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Yo Compu-Geeks! Wanna work for I-Mockery?

Just a quick note to let you guys know that we're currently looking to hire a Developer/Admin for I-Mockery's big site redesign, and most likely some ongoing work after that project is completed. You can read all the details about the jobby-job here.

In other news, I'm really happy to have finally done a piece on "Clash of the Titans". It's one of those movies that I must've watched a hundred times while I was growing up and I hope it brings back a lot o' memories for you too. Memories of severed Medusa heads, a hero with big, pouty lips and... robotic owls. Check out the article and let me know what you think.

I'd also like to remind you guys that we've just launched another forum contest in which you get to create a horrific Christmas tree for a chance to win a copy of "Black Christmas" on DVD. Snow in April? Sure, why not, as long as it's mixed with blood and horror. HORROR.

Now that we've got that stuff out of the way, I'd say it's high time we have another showdown here in the blog. Last time we had a breakfast showdown between Waffles and Pancakes and it sparked quite a debate. This time I'd like to pose the question about who would win in a fight: "Ge-Nan" from Samurai Showdown or "Blanka" from Street Fighter?

Sprite Showdown!
Samurai Showdown - Ge-Nan!Street Fighter - Blanka!
Ge-Nan vs. Blanka

Cast your votes and be sure to back up why you think your choice would win with supporting evidence!

79 comments

Guest

Jesse B (Guest) on 04/25/2007 8:30 pm

I demand that job. Or to get paided to play Guitar Hero and to kiss your ass.

Also, Blanka will totally runin Ge-Nan's shit. Reason? Electricity kicks Metals ass..



Guest

James (Guest) on 04/25/2007 8:46 pm

Ge'nan would most definitely win. Sure, Blanka has the electic offensive/defensive attack, but when he is all fizzled out, Gen'nan would have the reach with his freddy kruger arm and put a few holes into Blanka.



Guest

Gus (Guest) on 04/25/2007 9:16 pm

i would say Blanka. I mean, the electricity will probably be enough to like explode Ge'nans arm



Guest

ToxinBlackheart (Guest) on 04/25/2007 9:44 pm

I have to side with Blanka.

While both are mean green fighting machines, Blanka's shock attacks give him the upper hand. Ge-nan's metal claw only makes him a conductor in this fight.

Also, Blanka lacks Ge-Nan's inhibiting hunchback, and he has a head full of hair.



Guest

protoclown (Guest) on 04/25/2007 10:19 pm

I vote for Blanka because I actually know who he is. :(



Guest

Tim (Guest) on 04/25/2007 10:27 pm

Wouldn't Ge-nan's arm cause Blanka's electricity to do at least double, likely triple, or even quadruple damage? One hit kill. Blanka claims "VICTOLY"



Guest

DrBadfish (Guest) on 04/25/2007 11:57 pm

Blanka, easily. All those surprise lefts and rights, too quick for those Samurai Showdown fools.



Guest

SunnyD (Guest) on 04/26/2007 12:36 am

sadly, i didn't get a chance to play samuria showdown. the closest i got was capcom vs. snk 2 and he wasn't in it. but i gotta agree with teh rest. metal versus electricity?

blanka for the win!



Guest

NinjaRygar (Guest) on 04/26/2007 1:33 am

I actually put my money on Gen-an Shiranui. He's an actual demon, who fought in a time when armed fighting was life. It may take more than just electricity to take him down, even considering his metal claw.
The only reason Blanka might win in the end anyway is because neither of them are very bright. But I imagine Gen-an is a bit smarter... if only a little.



Guest

CS (Guest) on 04/26/2007 5:36 am

Gen-an. Everyone does a lot more damate in Samurai Shodown than Street Fighter. That and people actually use Gen-An on a competitive level now.



Guest

Mystik Tomato (Guest) on 04/26/2007 6:40 am

If Ge-Nan can beat up Freddy Kreuger and steal his glove, he'll wipe the floor with Blanka's green ass.



Guest

ElSingario (Guest) on 04/26/2007 7:38 am

Although I never played Samurai Showdown, I'm going to have to say Ge-Nan. Even if Blanka pulls the electricity out on him when he tries to use his claw, Ge-Nan will most likely get a shock, but Blanka will still get skewered.



Guest

Jimmy Jazz (Guest) on 04/26/2007 1:03 pm

BRANKA! chew his face off. end of story.



Guest

Styx (Guest) on 04/26/2007 2:17 pm

My vote's on Blanka

If Ge-Nan tries something with his metal-gloved hand Blanka would counter with some electricity which would fry Ge-Nan, if he tries something else that body part will be a snack for Blanka, He'll eat it.



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 04/26/2007 2:21 pm

Alright, I have to go with Ge-Nan on this one. To those of you who are making the "Blanka will win because he's got electricity!" arguement, you're forgetting one major factor...

Ge-Nan has POISON BREATH! So not only does he have a huge range with his Freddy glove, but he can spit out poison clouds from the other side of the screen. Let's see Blanka's electricity stop that!

Plus, you really can't go wrong with a character who has what is easily one of the BEST. VOICES. EVAR.

[Listen to Ge-Nan's Battle Cry!]

[Listen to Ge-Nan's Laugh!]

And to those of you who've never played any of the Samurai Showdown games... you need to remedy that immediately.



Guest

Steve (Guest) on 04/26/2007 2:29 pm

Hey RoG, why don't you just download the "MUGEN" game engine and have both of them battle?



Guest

Brian (Guest) on 04/26/2007 5:24 pm

Blanka man, but only because that's who i know the most. you won't believe how many summers i've spent in my friend mando's garage kicking ass with him



Guest

James (Guest) on 04/26/2007 6:59 pm

-RoG- has spoken! All hail Ge-Nan and his poison breath/freddy arm claw!



Guest

Spruce (Guest) on 04/26/2007 7:47 pm

Gen-An has one pretty amazing stage in Samurai Showdown 2...and yet I've had more success playing with Blanka.

Then again, Blanka was never anywhere near effective after Street Fighter 2...

Conclusion:
Assuming SFII era Blanka, even with the Beast roll and electricity, I've seen the poison breath at work, so special attacks are a wash. Blanka has some nice fierce attacks, but so doe Gen-an, and with more range. Gen-an in a close one.

We need more Samurai Showdown vs. Street Fighter surveys, stat.



Guest

Jesse B (Guest) on 04/26/2007 10:04 pm

Poison Breath?

POISON BREATH?!?

BLANKA SUCKS UP POISON BREATH LIKE IT WAS ORANGE TIC TACS!



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 04/26/2007 10:25 pm

Steve, tell me more about this "MUGEN" and how it works.

Spruce, aye, we'll have more surveys like this. I'm all for posting random surveys so we can all argue about the things in life that TRULY matter.

And hey folks, you read it here first... Jesse B just said "BLANKA SUCKS". I guess she changed her vote after all!



Guest

NinjaRygar (Guest) on 04/26/2007 11:52 pm

Mugen was a really popular 2d fighter engine made by elecbyte years ago.

Seriously... back then it was the greatest thing ever. You could download characters off of creators sites and play your own fantasy fighting game, people even made awesome original creations with it.

Sadly... the state it's in now... those days are long gone. There are a few creators left, but the community SUCKS. You'll never find a more unfriendly and hateful environment then the current mugen community. Characters are hard to come by... and if you want help you'll be treated like shit.

I've been into it for years, and it still rocks, but beware. (Also, there isn't a single decent Gen-an made for it.)



Guest

Scorpio420 (Guest) on 04/27/2007 1:34 am

Blanka. Period.



Guest

Supragenius (Guest) on 04/27/2007 1:40 am

Blanka has a REALLY low priority on a LOT of his moves. He also has to charge to do most of his attacks. Remember kids, a sweep kick will knock Blanka out of the electrical attack. This leaves Gen with a big opening to tick him afterwards, sending Blanka into a block stun, and allowing Gen to get an upper hand due to his higher priority and no-charge moves. Plus, the poison cloud would QUITE effectively wall Blanka's rolling attacks. The only way Blanka would win would be pure basic, fundamental fighting. Using his specials would put him at a HUGE disadvantage. He would have to rely on the amazon river rush to get under poison cloud, and his pounces could effectively allow him to escape Gen's harder, slow swing. Hard strikes in SS always have a HUGE recoil time, and even bigger if it whiffs. This would allow Blanka's crouching hard punch a bit of an advantage if he could block a hard slash. In the end, I think Gen would win unless controlled by a total newbie, and that also I have played WAY WAY too many 2D fighting games. And I still do. 2D forever!



Guest

Wolfman Jake (Guest) on 04/27/2007 2:08 am

Spruce, I think you're forgetting (or just never knew) how awesome Blanka was in the Capcom vs. SNK games. In CvS1, Blanka was one of, if not THE best Ratio 1 character. In CvS2, he got even better, especially considering you could assign him any ratio you wanted with your four points aloted, allowing for a VERY powerful and functional character for your team of choice.



Guest

Daniel (Guest) on 04/27/2007 6:48 am

Does Blanka still have his bitchslap attack? If so, Blanka would win.



Guest

Frostor (Guest) on 04/27/2007 7:04 am

Well, why limit the fight to 2D fighting game mechanics? I'm going to go with Blanka, not just because Street Fighter was my life at one point, but hey...in addition to the electricity > metal argument, poison breath? Blanka grew up in the freaking Amazon rainforest--he learned electricity attacks from communing with electric eels. Don't you think it's probable he's got pretty effective poison immunity as well, what with all the nasty creatures there?



Guest

Jesse B (Guest) on 04/27/2007 10:06 am

...

-GaH-, I am so angry at you, that only a article with pictures can describe my rage.



Guest

zug (Guest) on 04/27/2007 11:45 am

GE-NAN FTW. He's more fun to play with, Blanka is a chump.



Guest

Ralf (Guest) on 04/27/2007 2:25 pm

Gen-An. I've gotten sick of the SFII characters after Capcom whored them out for so many games. Plus, Gen-An has a gloves with huge knives in it. He may have copied Freddy Kruegar, but come on... that thing is badass!



Guest

Steve (Guest) on 04/27/2007 2:58 pm

Yep, basically what NinjaRygar said, great game engine, bad community.



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 04/27/2007 4:06 pm

Anybody else notice that Ge-Nan has FIVE razors on his fingers? Freddy never had one on this thumb, probably because he'd slice some of his own fingers off if he did. But not Ge-Nan. I guess green demons can handle the extra blade.



Guest

MattJack (Guest) on 04/27/2007 7:32 pm

If Blanka doesn't win, Hitler truly won and men have no souls.

How is Poison Breath going to help you when you have a 300lb mutant beast flying like a cannon ball towards your face? Answer: It's not.

Let's say Blanka decided to up the ante and go into crazy electric mode while doing this move, then what? I'll tell you what, Ge-Nan would be meeting his maker(SNK)!

Ge-Nan has a crazy voice and laugh.. BIG DEAL. Have you heard the Blanka yell after a match is won? Or how about when he is hurling himself at you at the speed of light? That is the voice of pain

If Hanzo was fighting Blanka it would be a different story, but Hanzo is the creme de la creme of SS while Blanka is the bottom of the barrell of SFII

Basically old skool (SNES/SEGA era) Capcom is nothing to fuck with, period.



Guest

Ray Charles (Guest) on 04/27/2007 8:15 pm

I gotta root for Ge-nan, the underdog. Blanka is too overrated here folks.



Guest

ColdFusion (Guest) on 04/27/2007 8:42 pm

I have often wondered if Blanka was really a troll or an oni, but apparently his backstory says he's a kid that fell into the jungle and learned how to be electric from eels. I guess he learned how to be green from.. AIDS monkeys...
But yeah, I'm pretty sure it's "Gen-an" so .. nice typos ^_^'



Guest

Keith (Guest) on 04/27/2007 10:20 pm

Have any of you seen electric eels in action? They don't visibly spark like Blanka. And an electric eel is already powerful enough to kill a person. So Blanka's electric charge, more powerful by many of orders of magnitude and conducted through a metal blade, would leave this Geman fellow looking like a french fry stuck in a microwave for an hour.



Guest

spencerjg (Guest) on 04/28/2007 4:06 am

gen-an,he would tottaly kick blankas green amazon ass,gen-an would be able to block and charge up blankas electric attacks and use them against him,besides hes got poison breath
POISON BREATH!!!so yeah he would kick his ass



Guest

Lol@This (Guest) on 04/28/2007 10:13 am

Your all a bunch of geeky fags.



Guest

Guy (Guest) on 04/28/2007 10:33 am

While initially swayed by Blanka's electric attacks, I have to conclude that the power and range of Ge-Nan gives him a decisive advantage. Provided he made no stupid mistakes, he would be able to defeat Blanka.

Guess I'm biased because I always did better in Samurai Showdown than I did on the Street Fighter games.



Guest

James (Guest) on 04/28/2007 12:12 pm

Hey Lol@This, if we are a bunch of "Geeky Fags" then why the hell are you here?



Guest

Ollie (Guest) on 04/28/2007 3:04 pm

Ge-nan because he looks cool, Blanka looks like he's taking an electric crap.



Guest

SenorBooyah (Guest) on 04/28/2007 3:45 pm

Blanka, no question. He got the exclamation point in the graphic. Exclamation point = win.



Guest

NinjaRygar (Guest) on 04/28/2007 3:54 pm

Hey Lol@This... perhaps discussing this does make us "geeky fags" BUT AT LEAST WE KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "your" AND "you're".
And YOU'RE obviously 12.



Guest

diraru (Guest) on 04/28/2007 5:17 pm

ge-nan gets my vote. The voice, the claw, the POISONOUS BREATH!! He's awesome.

As for mugen, you should give it a try RoG! Nothing beats watching predator impale dan hibiki with a spear, or scorpion using his infaous "fire breath" fatality on megaman.



Guest

diraru (Guest) on 04/28/2007 5:18 pm

Also, click my name for a good site to get started with, sadly they're under temproary maintenence right now...



Guest

Aaron der Schaedel (Guest) on 04/28/2007 8:03 pm

I'm for Blanka. He's able to generate electricity. Thinking realistically, if Ge-nan tries to go after Blanka with his kooky-looking metal arm thing, even if it puts a hole or two in Blanka, it's made of metal, and attached to Ge-nan's arm. He'll get shocked, fried, and he'll have a fist full of death afterwards.

tl;dr Metal conducts electricity, Blanka wins.



Guest

Skate (Guest) on 04/29/2007 10:10 am

Whoever wins, we lose.



Guest

Skate (Guest) on 04/29/2007 10:18 am

Wait, I didn't vote.

Ge-Nan FTW.



Guest

Jeff The Ninja (Guest) on 04/29/2007 10:48 am

Damnit



Guest

lolatthis (Guest) on 04/29/2007 1:28 pm

yeah the other guy is right, you guys ARE NERDS! :rolleyes



Guest

Spruce (Guest) on 04/29/2007 4:15 pm

Wolfman-Jake: I don't rememeber Blanka being good in either CvS game, since in Cvs1, it was all-Kim-all the-time with another random 2-pointer, or Sagat with a random 1 pointer(and it probably was Blanka too, since I liked him so much in SF2. But I didn't lose with Sagat enough to get memorable experience).

In CvS2, it was Kim, Sagat, Haohmaru. Somehow Blanka slipped under my radar again. I'll take your word for it, but he broke my heart after I played SF Alpha 3 right after SF2, and that's what I'm basing my memory off of.

As for poison breath immunity: Cham-Cham and Tam-Tam grew up in the jungle, and they weren't immune. Badass ninja men like Hanzo aren't immune. Massive Chinese warriors like Wan-Fu aren't immune. Badass as Blanka is, I don't think he's immune either.



Guest

arg_zombies (Guest) on 04/29/2007 4:23 pm

I'll have to go for that Ge-gay guy, even though I don't like him...
Blanca used to be my favourite street fighter character, I used him to beat the games every single time
But then I watched the Street Fighter film
and found out that he wasn't blue, as has been shone on my gameboy all along

That scarred me for life



Guest

Fat_Saget (Guest) on 04/29/2007 4:57 pm

I feel like Ge-Nan could beat Blanka, but he'd put up a good fight. HE COULD LATCH ONTO PEOPLES HEADS! I have a feeling Ge-Nan would leave the fight a fried, chewed-up, amputated demon.



Guest

Fat_Saget (Guest) on 04/29/2007 4:59 pm

BTW, the only person who agreed with Lol@this happened to be called Lolatthis...

hmm...



Guest

Spruce (Guest) on 04/29/2007 5:21 pm

Fat-Saget: It could end up like that fight between Sagat and Adon. You know, the one Capcom said happened to advance the story line or soemthing. Where Adon beat Sagat because Sagat wasn't concentrating, but Adon ended up in hospitalized for months after the battle.

Hey, that's what those Gamefaqs guys said.



Guest

Shane Skekel (Guest) on 04/29/2007 7:28 pm

Me, it depends on who is controlling who. Besides, Gen-An probably has his gauntlet insulated to prevent being electrocuted.



Guest

Brent (Guest) on 04/29/2007 8:59 pm

Blanka, electrocute FTW!



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 04/29/2007 10:33 pm

Haha, some of you are still trying to make that argument that Blanka's electricity would destroy Ge-Nan simply because he has a razor glove. Well I've got one word for you:

VEGA beats BLANKA
VEGA

He doesn't have any problem kicking Blanka's ass... and he doesn't even have poison breath. Game over.



Guest

Steve (Guest) on 04/30/2007 1:00 am

The joystick must have been broken, because Vega sucks ass!



Guest

Jesse B (Guest) on 04/30/2007 1:23 am

-RoG-, you have to pull the Vaga card, eh?

Know why he wears that mask?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/63/VegaSF.jpg

BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE A CHICK.

He's the Raiden of Street Fighter.



Guest

Jesse B (Guest) on 04/30/2007 1:24 am

*Vega

(i'm going to get nailed for that)



Guest

SenorBooyah (Guest) on 04/30/2007 2:28 am

I call shenanigans on that picture. Where's the proof that there was a player trying to win with Blanka? According to my legal-type lawyerin' book for legality (tm), that's not hard evidence.



Guest

MrSteveTic (Guest) on 04/30/2007 2:29 am

For the sake of allthe purists, it's Balrog, not Vega.

Here's a run down goes American Name-Original Name
M. Bison- Vega
Vega- Balrog
Balrog- M. Bison
They had to change the names around in order not to infringe on any of Mike Tyson's Intellectual property (try saying that and Mike Tyson in the same sentence without cracking a smile)

As for the big question, I'd have to go with Blanka on this one, or maybe a double KO, sure Gen An may poison Blanka With his breath and then close in for the kill, but the moment those bladey finger things touch the Amazonian Wrecking ball's skin, in a last ditch effor to save his win loss reccord, Blanka would summon all his remianing conciousness and shock Gen-an... All the way up the shoulder into the heart baby. Counter blow double damage, possible win to Blanka.



Guest

Black Tooth Grin (Guest) on 04/30/2007 12:34 pm

this little toad fella would slash away at blanka but with each slash he'd get his ass fried. blanka would be immune to the poisonous breath due to time spent in the jungle with poisonous snakes and shit.

BLANKS WINS!

ROOOOOAAAARRRRR



Guest

Max Radical (Guest) on 04/30/2007 3:33 pm

Blanka, without a shadow of a question of a doubt.

The reason? Because the original will always triumph over the weak copied shill, and never was that so clear than the days of SFII and Samurai Showdown - or should I say, SFII and the ten-million knockoffs.

It was tragic watching them mill through the clones (the real signpost was how every single game back then had a stretchy-limbs character, usually an Inspector-gadget style robot, despite the fact that Dhalsim sucked even the first time around).



Guest

Black Tooth Grin (Guest) on 04/30/2007 5:17 pm

Dhalism was good for beginners.

You've got to wonder why he wasn't more popular with the ladies, considering he must have a twelve-foot dong.



Guest

Jason Kaine (Guest) on 04/30/2007 7:20 pm

the condemned has the trailers for hostel 2 and the halloween remake...that should be enough reason for anyone to go see it..plus its a decent flick.



Guest

Spruce (Guest) on 04/30/2007 7:55 pm

Somehow, I don't think all of you have actually played SS...seriously it's nothing like SF gameplay-wise. That's why everyone loses so damn much when they first play.



Guest

Arnin (Guest) on 04/30/2007 8:55 pm

I root for Blanka. Gen-an is, you know... cool... but Blanka's mouth is big enough to take out most of Gen-an in one bite. Also, come on. Poison breath? Blanka is very agile for his size, and his skin (depending on what player you are, I'll admit) matches the color of the poison. It probably won't do much.



Guest

NinjaRygar (Guest) on 04/30/2007 9:50 pm

Gen an also wins because he has:

HOT DECENDANTS



Guest

haltox (Guest) on 05/01/2007 9:37 pm

Probably Ge-Nan. Blanka's shock wouldn't be amplified by his arm because, unlike what many seem to think, metal doesn't have the property to increase the strenght of an electrical current, it would simply go to his hand faster and then follow its course through his body (in the best case the current would be simply as strong as at the beginning). Also, he could simply poison breath the green bitch and wait until he dies.

By the way, when will the Gymkata contest's results will be posted?



Guest

FlameAdder (Guest) on 05/02/2007 3:52 am

Hey Rygar, I heard that Gen-an and Mai actually aren't related. Not sure if it's true, but I've seen it in more than one place.



Guest

Teros (Guest) on 05/02/2007 10:40 am

Actually haltox, Ge-Nan's metal arm would increase the electric current going through his body but not because the metal amplifies the current but actually because the metal would have considerably less resistance than his skin. Still, it is too close to call so the only way we could prove it is by using MUGEN (best 3 out of 5 matches to make the results accurate)



Guest

commodorejohn (Guest) on 05/02/2007 1:19 pm

Tough call. Ge-Nan is a pretty tough opponent (although nobody but NOBODY can get all up on your ass like Earthquake; damn you, Earthquake,) but Blanka can just hit and hit and hit and hit and keep going until your poor character is DEAD. Not that you have a chance of doing the same when playing as Blanka.

Bitter? Just a little.



Guest

Regen (Guest) on 05/02/2007 1:52 pm

Just a thought but looking at ol' Genny's sprite, it seems to me that his weapon has a mesh covering to keep it more secure on his arm, that, coupled with the fact that there is no obvious method for securing it to him, implies to me that there is at least some level of padding between his upper arm and the metal.

Presuming that this is true, Gen-Nan would not likely be electrocuted any more severely then he would be without, and assuming the least of Blanka's electrical abilities, that he simply channels electricity to the surface of his skin, then any stab wound and a subsequent attempt to electrify his skin could theoretically stop his heart and prove fatal to Blanka.

If not, then the only question is Gen-Nan's ability to persist through pain and maintain some control over his body, since it would not take much for his claws to fatally maim Blanka.



Guest

Kahou (Guest) on 05/04/2007 3:22 am

By your logic, RoG, I'd say that Chun Li wins.

Airgrab you out of vegas airgrab special > Vega =Gen-an > Blanka
Therefore Chun wins.



Guest

King Shokan (Guest) on 05/04/2007 9:34 am

I'd say Ge-nan would easily win because he's the only who actually KILLS in the games he appears in, while Blanka never posed a real threat to someone's life. Besides, he comes from Japan.



Guest

Scott (Guest) on 05/04/2007 11:12 am

Blanka would eat him, I loved Gen-an in SS, but I always found him too difficult to control. Blanka's not my favourite SF guy (has to be vega, the wolverine claws are just TOO damn cool) but he's basically a rabid animal... So... Yah...



Guest

Arabian Knight (Guest) on 06/15/2007 9:40 am

Blankas name is Jimmy ( play SFA 3 with Dan to see) Im gonna say that Gee Nan would win simply because he would trick Blanka into being his friend (Blanka is nice) and then stab him in the back with his freddy glove.



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