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the-license-plate

The License Plate

by Dr. Boogie on 01/21/2008, 6:35 am

Anybody catch the number of that plate?

It's very uncommon for me to see anything particularly noteworthy on my drive home from work. Yesterday, however, I saw something quite unusual, and it was on the car in front of me at the entrance to the highway. It was far more eye-catching than any bumper sticker, though it could be found in the same general area. You see, the license plate on the car in front of me is what caught my attention. (more...)

32 Comments

doing-the-dishes-is-like-tetris

Doing The Dishes Is Like Tetris.

by -RoG- on 01/17/2008, 3:22 pm

Dishwasher Tetris - Coming soon to the Nintendo Wii.

I know it's a fairly typical thing to say, but I really do hate doing the dishes. I hate it so much that I've often considered replacing all the dishes we own with disposable paper plates, dixie cups and plastic cutlery (sporks optional). Aside from the inherent wastefulness of going down that route, I think one of the main reasons I can't bring myself to do it is because most plastic cutlery is too weak (for example, try cutting an onion in half with a plastic knife). So yeah, I'm definitely gonna stick with real dishes until I can figure out a better solution. I also know that I shouldn't even really complain about doing them since having a dishwasher can actually be a luxury depending on where you live. I've lived in places where I had to do all the dishes by hand and that's an entirely different level of annoying. (more...)

46 Comments

in-which-i-offer-up-my-obsession-with-zac-efron

In Which I Offer Up My Obsession With Zac Efron

by Max Burbank on 01/16/2008, 1:08 pm

You can call me Zac

Gentle reader, last night I told me eldest daughter it was my plan to divorce her mother and gay marry Zac Efron. I advised her to get used to the idea that Zacky was going to be her new dad as quickly as possible. I did this because A.) I am the best Dad ever, and B.) Zac Efron is the most dreamiest dreamboat crown prince of unintentional comedy that ever was.

My daughters are twelve and seven, so I’ve seen “High School Musical” (or at least been in the room when it’s on) several times now. Zac’s big show stoppin’ song and dance tirade ‘Bet On It’ is so howlingly hilarious I was quite literally reduced to tears the first time I saw it. (more...)

37 Comments

orbitz-the-lava-lamp-of-the-beverage-industry-still-exists

Orbitz, The Lava Lamp Of The Beverage Industry, Still Exists!

by -RoG- on 01/15/2008, 2:41 am

Orbitz!

You should all know by now that I'm a huge sucker for novelty food and beverage items, so it should come as no surprise when I shout to the heavens about how ORBITZ LIVES AGAIN!!! Now before I get ahead of myself, let me explain a little bit about this amazing fruity beverage from yesteryear. Orbitz was a non-carbonated drink that was released by the Clearly Canadian company back in 1996 and featured colorful edible balls which lay suspended in the liquid. The balls were able to "defy gravity" like this because they were the same density as the liquid and had some help from the gellan gum ingredient. While the Orbitz drink itself wasn't as bad as some people made it out to be, it didn't last long in the marketplace and was sadly discontinued. That hasn't stopped it from garnering a cult following over the years however, and you can still find old bottles of it for sale on eBay (though I wouldn't recommend drinking them at this point - if you're gonna get 'em, just put 'em on display for your friends and family to gaze upon with awe). (more...)

115 Comments

hey-comic-nerds

Hey, Comic Nerds.

by Protoclown on 01/14/2008, 3:59 am

Discover the feeling... learn to read.

Now before you get your Wolverine panties in a bunch over me calling you nerds, you can rest assured that I'm one too. Now that we have that out of the way, a lot of people have inquired about what comics I read on a monthly basis. I mean, it's pretty obvious from my Longbox columns what comics I don't like, but what ones do I actually enjoy reading (or hate myself enough to keep buying)?

So I figured I'd share my "pull list", and then maybe you can show me your "pull list", and then maybe we can go somewhere private and pull each other's lists for a while. (more...)

61 Comments

my-new-aquatic-pets

My New Aquatic Pets

by -RoG- on 01/11/2008, 2:14 am

We <3 Cryptobiosis

Before I went to college, I used to have pets all the time. Cats, fish, reptiles, bugs... you name it. While all the other kids were dreaming of becoming astronauts and baseball stars, I was 100% certain that I wanted to become an entomologist. One of my hobbies was catching black widow spiders in jars and then showing them to my friends, impressing them with my vast knowledge of arachnids. "See this one here? See the red hourglass symbol on it? That means it can kill ya!" Yes indeed, I was well on my way to a rewarding career in entomology. (more...)

56 Comments

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