Silver on 06/07/2008 2:21 pm

Well it looks like you have a point when you say that about youth being a state of mind instead of a physical one, Proto. My gramps is 66 years old and he can still kick ass in behalf of his entire generation when it comes to wit and sarcasm. For some reason I really admire, he always like to make fun of everything that happens and that's something I really envy, because we know that nowadays that's not as easy as it sounds. Sure, he rants a lot about some things, but he always makes sure that his listeners have a smile on their face.

I hope that you keep growing the way you are Proto, your articles always bring some genuine chuckles every time I read them (I still remember the first one I read from you about Public Restroom Etiquette). If anyone tells you otherwise you can be a sweet teddy bear and tell them to go and screw themselves.

Juanfer on 06/07/2008 2:31 pm

growing up is certainly scary

"A minority of people manage to maintain that youthful exuberance throughout their lives. Youth isn't a physical aspect of oneself so much as a state of mind."

that's what's important

Benmark (Guest) on 06/07/2008 4:22 pm

Hell, I'm still trying to make up for all the things I missed as a kid. I'm 22 years old and will still float my inflatable boat in the neighborhood swimming pool in front of gawking soccer moms-I'm not ashamed!

Aries (Guest) on 06/07/2008 4:40 pm

I'm 33 and I'm going to get quite drunk at a punk show tonight!

Aries (Guest) on 06/07/2008 4:42 pm

And BTW, I spent Wednesday night doing unspeakable things with a couple of girls from a fetish club.

panther3k on 06/07/2008 4:49 pm

"A day without music is a day in hell." Very well put. And I'm turning 30 next year; thanks for putting things in perspective.

Gilgongo on 06/07/2008 6:56 pm

Just turned 31 this past March and I'm still not used to the idea of it. I just try to remember what Bukowski said... "It's not about how old you can get, It's about how long you can maintain your moxie."

alittlebirdytoldmeso on 06/07/2008 8:27 pm

Yeah well, try being your age, totally immature and a woman. I've tried to champion the Venture Brothers cause to my "normal" female friends and they look at me like my head has spun off. And don't get me started about the pity looks I get when I tell people at work I own a PS3. Anyway, my dad is 53 and he still plays video games - so, he's totally my role model.

gr8bishie on 06/07/2008 9:11 pm

At what age does one stop anticipating growing older and begin to dread it? I'm sixteen, and I cant wait for seventeen, eighteen, nineteen... TWENTY... Then again, I don't really have a plan for thirty and beyond. I always thought thirty was the year one truly became an adult, though the law says eighteen. Well, happy birthday, Proto, and to you, Max. Keep on mockin'.

Pentegarn on 06/07/2008 9:16 pm

Age is relative. Have a happy b-day

Doctor_Who on 06/07/2008 9:46 pm

Growing up is entirely optional.

I myself intend to be the same immature screwball until I hit about 65, at which point my plan is to immediately model my entire personality after that of Professor Farnsworth.

Copper on 06/07/2008 10:26 pm

You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.

Says the 30 year old that's been mistaken for someone not old enough to drive (by a waitress) and get into a casino (by my beau, heh.) Another friend of mine says "We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing." So whatever your favorite form of play is, be it video games, puzzles, toys, concerts, whatnot, keep it up. It's what keeps you young!

Fear N Loathing on 06/07/2008 11:53 pm

31? Man Proto... As I prefer to say, "It's not the years, it's the mileage!"

And as it were, my odometer done gone and been kicked over a couple of times...

Ruler of Galaxy (Guest) on 06/08/2008 12:42 am

Happy birthday proto! just be glad you can legally drink, buy porn, lotto tickets, you know good stuff, oh yeah and vote but no one cares about that

0dd1 on 06/08/2008 1:26 am

Age is definitely not something definite. I like to think of myself as mentally being a composite of a five year old kid who loves to play, a fifteen year old with a pessimistic view on the world, a twentysomething optimist, and a sixty-five year old sailor who can really punch a guy out if he damn near wants to just because it's fun.

I'm one of those in terms of my physical self, but that's just one of me. (NO I DO NOT HAVE ISSUES!! NOR DO I HAVE MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER!! My psychologist tells me I'm normal...of course he also backs away a few feet when I stand up and speaks in a voice more soothing than that person who does those massage videos...)

Colonel Flagg on 06/08/2008 4:21 am

Happy Birthday.

Your philosophy is sound - my kids are growing up listening to bands that I grew up with, and they're liking that just fine.

Stay young in mind, but gain wisdom in age.

Alesmus (Guest) on 06/08/2008 8:23 am

Happy Birthday Proto. Although i can't figure why you'd feel that way, i am 17 since last 24th of May and the only thing i have wanted since i can remember since i have memory is being grown up so i could be treated like one and not a "kid", i don't care about play or being immature, to me it is a waste of time and luckily, my mother has always treated me more decently than all the other kids i know. Oh well, i suppose life placed us in the wrong place in time.

Relaxing Dragon on 06/08/2008 2:47 pm

Liking the attitude there, Proto. Good to keep positive, especially when what you're dealing with... well, actually, it's not really a bad thing you're dealing with. You may be getting older, but your mind is still wonderfully the same. Happy birthday, and hope you continue to do the things you do best that the rest of us love so much.

hurr (Guest) on 06/08/2008 4:33 pm

Look at that frog
goddamn

Tetsu Deinonychus on 06/08/2008 8:53 pm

Thank you to Proto and Copper.

I'll be 25 in a couple months, and I've been freaking out about my age since I hit 22.

But, what you each said really helps.

Desert_Screams on 06/08/2008 9:09 pm

It ain't so awful. I slipped on that particular banana peel-- turning thirty-one-- five months ago, and hell has not quite yet frozen over. I'm plagued by the same problems I've had for years-- bum knees, mostly deaf in one year-- but those derive from years of punishing myself at soccer, not from the decrepitness inherent within three-decades-plus-one.

But I think pretty much the same way, although I think you've expressed it far better than I ever could. There's no biological need to put aside a frame of reference in favor of another one, even though many people do it....I'm typing this with Captain Spaulding and Hannibal Lecter figures staring at me from one end of the desk, and a PULP FICTION one-sheet down at the other. And the day I think I'm too old for any of these things-- on my wall, on my desk, in my head-- is the day I strap myself to a rocker and Mexican-suicide-chair that mother.

simogene on 06/09/2008 5:31 am

"Grow old if you must, but never grow up." - Dr. Seuss

I find spending most of my days around five year-olds a good remedy for being 31.

Happy birthday!

Steve Smashstuff on 06/09/2008 8:44 am

You kids keep it down!

Icculus on 06/09/2008 8:44 am

Happy birthday proto. It appears that I am the median of age here...turning 27 in august. I really haven't changed over my years too much. I've noticed little things...I think that might be how it works though. You change ever so slightly and you rationalize everything you’re changing. Then one day you wake up and your 36, there's juice box stains on the couch, you want to get to Home Depot before it gets too busy, and you’re listening to Radio Disney. I've seen it happen.

Ronin S on 06/09/2008 8:52 am

I know everyone else has already said it, but I hope you have a Happy Birthday too, Proto.

And I totally know what you mean about people saying that you need to 'act your age'. One of my girlfriends now is starting to feel embarrassed about going to anime conventions because she thinks we're getting 'too old'. Everyone at her job comments on how immature she is. I don't see what other people's perceptions of us should dictate what we should and shouldn't be doing.

matty (Guest) on 06/09/2008 9:25 am

Seriously all those losers who use "the kids" as an excuse for not having fun are just stupid. I have two kids and instead of losing my ability to have fun, I have more fun and have an excuse. Nobody looks at you strangely in the children's book section if you have two kids to cart along with you. Nobody thinks its weird if you're prancing around in Toys R Us if you've got a five year old in tow. And as the kids grow up, it will be even more fun.

I think people grow up and get boring just because they think they have to, but really, all getting older means is that it takes more time to recover from a night of debauchery (be it just staying up late playing SNES or drinking or dancing or whatever).

Granted the first two years of a kids life is annoying what with all the enforced responsibility of diapers and feeding and bathing, but if you can make that fun, you'll be able to then carry on to a whole world of fun.

I'm sick of hearing people say they aren't ready to give up their lives and settle down. There is nothing "settled down" about having kids and a spouse and a home unless you let it get that way. So don't look at turning 31 as the beginning of the end or whatever, just look at it as a chance to get to have fun...all over again.

-RoG- on 06/09/2008 12:09 pm

Proto told me he wants to sleep with the goddamn Batman on his birthday. Let's make it happen for him!

Courtney (Guest) on 06/09/2008 12:23 pm

happy birthday proto!!! now you have old balls HA!

JC (Guest) on 06/09/2008 1:35 pm

Proto, have a very happy birthday and screw the age thing. I'm actually 40 staring hard at 41 now and I don't let my physical age stop me from doing and enjoying the things that I like. I just got my first motorcycle (the wife calls it the mid-life crisis-cycle) and am almost done with my first tattoo sleeve which was a gift to myself for making it to 40! I listen to punk music with my kids, still love comics and cartoons and don't go anywhere without my iPod. Just continue to surround yourself with the people and things that you love and all the rest is gravy. Many happy returns.

Dave (Guest) on 06/09/2008 3:20 pm

You're right - the older people get, the more boring and uniform they become. It's kind of sad to see, for instance, people who could have been real vivacious and free-spirited in their teens and early twenties, reach middle age transformed into just another downtrodden white-collared zombie doing the 9 to 5 day in, day out with no life besides their car, their cubicle and pleasing their asshole boss. Is that what aging is really like ? To hell with that crap.

Happy Birthday, anyway.

Jimbob Jones (Guest) on 06/09/2008 3:55 pm

I'm a few weeks short of turning 33, so I'm pretty much right there with you.

Honestly, I don't see the age thing as a problem. Granted, it puts a little more pressure on my whole "get a damned book published" goal, but, other than that, it hasn't changed who I am. I still love comics and role-playing games (as well as some seriously-awesome board games -- anyone who loves Zombies and hasn't played "Last Night on Earth" should have their skin peeled from their bones).

However, the "wisdom" thing has come into play a few times. I notice myself wasting less time lately with hobbies that don't really give me a lot. I stopped enjoying video games a few years back (no real reason -- I just noticed my enjoyment of them dropped dramatically), so I stopped playing them, rather than playing them just because I felt I "should" because I used to enjoy them. I also dropped my game-programming hobby. The strange thing was in both cases, I was SERIOUSLY bummed out, because I felt I should still enjoy them, since both had been a huge part of my life for so long.

Other than those two things (neither of which I really enjoyed any more, and certainly didn't drop because I "had" to), I haven't really changed, and now have more time to do stuff I really WANT to do, like writing, playing other games, and graphic design.

As for the kids thing, my kids have made me laugh more than anyone ever (and they're an awesome reason to act immature). They love the Smurfs, Scooby Doo, The Muppet Show, and Tom and Jerry. So I'm all set.

Ferrit on 06/09/2008 4:13 pm

I'm 37, with a family of my own that includes 3 cats and a 17 year old son. I never noticed myself getting more and more responsible as the years went by and the bills piled up and the economy started to tank - it's just something that happened all on its own. But I do still manage to split my time up between being insanely responsible, and spending hours in front of my 360 going on super fun happy killfests on GTAIV, or hosting Troma-Thons, or other movie marathons featuring movies that "normal, older, straight people" wouldn't be caught dead watching. Granted, periods of being responsible seem to last a lot longer than just kicking back and unplugging myself from what I'm "supposed to be doing", but I take what I can get, and enjoy the hell out of "off duty" times all the more.

Happy Birthday Proto - it's all down hill from here :)

10,000 Volt Ghost on 06/09/2008 4:14 pm

I was watching the original Johnny Quest show before work today and I realized it was 6/9 day today. Then I remembered to wish Proto a happy birthday today.

Happy B-day

J. Tithonus Pednaud on 06/09/2008 4:19 pm

Happy Birthday Proto. Congrats on being firmly entrenched in your 30's. It's not so bad, I just turned 32 and I expect to hit 90. So, I'm barely a third of the way to my ultimate destination.

Duct Tape Ninja on 06/09/2008 6:53 pm

I've just turned 15 myself and i'm already dreading every passing year. Although i'm still a child at heart, people dont see it that way.

Jimbob Jones (Guest) on 06/09/2008 7:13 pm

I've just turned 15 myself and i'm already dreading every passing year.

I'm about 1/2 step away from kicking you in the nads.

test tube (Guest) on 06/09/2008 9:41 pm

I'm 24 and I play in a punk band with 40 year olds who remember buying KILL EM ALL when it was first released, bet your ass those guys got some badass record collections.

I don't care about getting old anymore, until I get to the age where I can't fucking walk or hold my feces. The best people I know are older, the worst people I know are young and fucking worthless, in fact young people today seem to shut their minds before they even reach 18. Fuck everyone actually, but yeah, people who have no clue and feel they have an obligation to become lame deserve their fate, fuck em!

Rock on!

Protoclown on 06/09/2008 10:09 pm

Thanks guys!

And those of you who are older than me and are obviously still cool, interesting, awesome people, you give me hope!! Obviously the kind of person who comes to I-Mockery in their 30s or 40s is going to be more interesting than your average schmuck you'd meet on the street, and I'm glad to know there are so many of you out there.

Copper on 06/09/2008 11:16 pm

It's still Proto's birthday on the west coast (pay no mind that I'm in the EST...)

Fat_Hippo on 06/10/2008 12:23 pm

Happy b-day, Proto. And about what you said in the 2nd part of you blog entry: I totally agree. I see this every day with my mother. I don't know jack shit about her music tastes, except that she USED to listen to Queen, but all she listens to nowadays is the radio or whatever my dad listens to. I find it kinda sad actually.

Count Mek on 06/15/2008 10:53 am

You hit the nail right on the head there Proto; but still, well done for surviving for this long :D