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Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie

by -RoG- on 04/11/2007, 1:42 pm

On Monday, John (Dr. Boogie) and I got to attend an advance private screening of the new "Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters". We were pretty excited to see the flick because we're both fans of the show - plus the screening room had some extremely nice seats that all movie theaters should be required to have these days considering how much tickets cost. For me, anything involving Carl Brutananadilewski and his daily struggles to stay alive during his neighbors' latest botched experiments is always a source of insta-chuckles. That man alone is what got me into the show and kept me hooked on it. Without spoiling anything for those of you who plan on seeing the movie, lemme give you a brief synopsis of it. It's basically an origin story that goes out of its way to NOT really tell you much at all about the origins of Frylock, Master Shake and Meatwad. Unfortunately, the movie itself was a let-down. The humor just fell flat all too often and it felt like they were desperately trying to stretch it out for the full 90 minutes. John and I were both in agreement that the show works much better in the 15-minute format we've all seen on Adult Swim. They're simply able to tell a whole story and get straight to the funny stuff, and there's no time for the jokes to get old that way. That's not to say the movie is completely devoid of laughs, I'm just saying most ATHF fans will probably feel like it was too long for its own good.

The good news is that many of your favorite side-characters from past episodes are in the movie including MC Pee Pants, the Mooninites, Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future, and more. I gotta say though, I was hoping to see Happy Time Harry in there, but he never showed up. Guess he was busy with his "action bills" or something.

The most surprising thing, however, is the intro before the movie. I won't spoil it for you, but it's a spoof on those old-fashioned cartoons that would play before movies telling you to grab a refreshment and not to talk during the show. Honestly, it was one of the most hilarious things I've seen in quite a while and everybody who was in the screening room was dying with laughter. So yeah, I guess it says a lot about the movie when the intro (that's not even technically a part of the movie) is the funniest thing about it.

One thing's for sure though: while I didn't care that much for the movie, I definitely need to get my hands on the poster for it.

Best. Poster. EVER.
There's no denying that this is one of the greatest posters ever made.

33 Comments

Easter candies galore, Zelda and Grindhouse!

by -RoG- on 04/07/2007, 4:34 pm

I've never been a huge fan of Easter, it's just one of those so-called holidays that come and go without much hoopla. Actually, Easter is the only holiday that simultaneously allows you to celebrate a guy who was brutally nailed to a cross and fluffy white bunnies. That's a pretty awesome dichotomy. But hey, if nothing else, with Easter's arrival, you can always expect some tasty candies. Naturally, I horde bags upon bags of my favorite Cadbury Mini Eggs whenever Easter rolls around. But there are some other candies deserving of your attention this season.

God sure looks tasty

First up is a candy that I just don't get - Palmer's Happy Easter Candy Cross. Maybe it's just me, but isn't it just a bit sacrilegious to make an edible crucifix? I mean, I don't see them making edible baby Jesus chocolates come Christmas each year... though they should. Well, all I can say is this...

Think it still works on vampires after you've taken a bite out of it?
Being a heathen sure is delicious!

Next up on the candy list is Jelly Belly's Prehistoric Egg. I'm not sure what dinosaurs really have to do with Easter, but at least they lay eggs. And Easter is ALL about the eggs, right? Right.

Fossilized in chocolate!

If you've gotta go, I supposed being fossilized in a chocolate egg isn't a bad way to go. Still, while I appreciate the novelty of the item, the combination of solid milk chocolate and a chewy dinosaur fruit snack in the middle just isn't working.

And, of course, no Easter would be complete without Marshmallow Peeps candies. Now we've all had the Marshmallows before, but there are some other Peep things on the market this year:

The Marshmallow Peeps are invading your holiday once again!

Lollipop rings, push-up pops and chick & bunny candy with Peeps stickers. All of these candies look nice as you would expect, but the one thing I don't understand is why they insisted on making all of them taste just like Marshmallow Peeps. I love Peeps as much as the next guy, but I'll be the first to admit that they're not exactly the tastiest things on the planet. Fact is, if you eat more than one at a time you'll probably start to feel nauseous. With all these new candies they had the opportunity to brand outside of the standard marshmallow flavor, while still maintaining the awesome Peeps style. Trust me when I say that a marshmallow-flavored lollipop is one of the strangest things you'll ever taste. Ah well, at least they all look good.

Be sure to take a stroll down I-Mockery memory lane and check out some of our old Peep-themed pieces:

-The Marshmallow Peeps Marshmallow Maker!
-Marshmallow Peeps in Outer Space!
-The Quest for Peeps!

And don't forget, I'm interviewed in the "The Power of the Peep" documentary that's due out next year. Can't wait for that one.

In other news, my brother gave me a copy of "Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess" for the Wii to try out. So Re and I were playing it late last night when all of a sudden Link gets angry, starts twitching and turns into a wolf. A WOLF!? Granted I haven't played (read: "been interested in") a Zelda game since A Link To The Past on the SNES, but just when in the hell did the series start implementing elements to entertain people with a furry fetish? Seriously, if he doesn't turn back into the sword-slashin', slingshot-packin', creepy-eyed elf pronto, I just might have to stop playing this game forever. Keep the animality stuff with Mortal Kombat, damnit.

Furthermore, are there any more shape-shifting horrors that await me in this Zelda game? If he turns into a goddamned butterfly, I just might have to kill the world.

Yesterday, I got to catch an early showing of "Grindhouse" at one of the biggest theaters around and it did not disappoint at all. In fact, I can't remember the last time I've been so entertained by a movie. It's really hard to say which of the two movies I liked better, I'll probably have to see it again before I can make any official decision. I will say this though; Tarantino continues to impress the hell out of me. I honestly don't think anybody out there is better at writing dialogue that comes off as completely natural as his does. And Kurt Russell? Even after all these years, he is still THE MAN.

Survey: What's the craziest thing you've ever seen packaged in one of those giant store-bought Easter baskets?

Survey #2: Who saw "Grindhouse" this weekend? Which of the two movies did you like better and why? What was your favorite "fake" trailer?

54 Comments

FlavorProtect? I call bullshit! Also: the Indian Butter Trick!

by -RoG- on 03/30/2007, 10:24 am

So I was making a batch of Pasta Roni the other day when I was reminded of something I had meant to discuss on here a while ago. See, one of the ingredients for Pasta Roni is butter, and on the back of my Land O'Lakes butter box I saw this notice:

I call bullshit!

A while back I had seen a commercial promoting this so-called "FlavorProtect" wrapper as a big selling point. For chrissakes, it's just a wrapper! It's the same kind of wrapper that all sticks of butter come packaged in! So yes, I am calling bullshit on their FlavorProtect wrapper. What exactly is it about the Land O'Lakes wrapper that makes it "protect" the butter flavor far more than other butter wrappers? Do they have some sort of über-secret wrapping technology or did they simply steal these preservation methods from the Egyptian mummification process? We may never find out the truth.

Well anyway, since we're on the topic of Land O'Lakes butter, this is probably as good a time as any for me to share the infamous Indian Butter Trick with you. Now I'm sure that many of you have heard of this old trick, but for the uninitiated, allow me to explain...

Screw the Pilgrims, for I have butter!

The idea behind this trick is to take the Land O'Lakes Indian lady and make it so you can lift up her box of butter to reveal a "surprise" behind it. In order to do this trick, you'll need one box of Land O'Lakes butter. Each box has two sides that feature the full logo, and you'll need to keep both of them. Cut each of these sides apart from the rest of the box and throw the remnants away (optional task: burn the "FlavorProtect" side in effigy). Now with one of the two logo sides, you'll want to use an X-Acto knife and cut along the bottom, left and right edges of the box of butter that she's holding in the picture. You do this so that you can lift up the box as if it's on a hinge. Make sure you don't cut the top edge though, otherwise, you'll just ruin the project completely. Next, you'll want to take the other box side that you cut out and remove the knees from the picture. Now all you have to do is attach the knees to the back of the other box side where you originally cut out the three sides of the butter box. So what's the result of all this crafty work?

Does the FlavorProtect Wrapper protect those too?

You have an Indian woman who unveils her boobs when you lift up the butter box flap. Yep, it's one of those tricks that somebody with waaaaaaaaay too much time on their hands came up with, but hey, at least they contributed something to society, right? Right.

The feel good book of the year!

In other news, one of my old favorite lyricists, John S. Hall, has just put out a new book. Some of you may remember him from the band King Missile and the song "Detachable Penis" that was a big hit on radio stations for a while. I still maintain they have FAR greater songs than that one though, "Ed" being my favorite, and Hall has also done some excellent spoken word material. His new book is called "Daily Negations" and the title pretty much sums it up. It's a satirical collection of negative thoughts - one for each day of the year. For example: "July 11: Today I will not let occasional lapses of beauty or goodness stand in the way of my having a bad day." If you ask me, it's the "feel good" book of the year. Pick it up, and while you're at it, get some King Missile CDs too.

On a final note, I'm happy to announced that Season 2 of the Upright Citizens Brigade is finally coming out this fall. You might recall that I-Mockery played a large part in getting the first season of UCB released on DVD, so it's really great to see that the second season is finally coming out. Finally, you'll have a chance to learn about the glorious Spaghetti Jesus or the dangers of Supercool.

Survey: Ok now 'fess up perverts, how many of you have tried (or plan on trying) the Land O'Lakes Indian Butter Trick?

Blog Contest: Post one of your own daily negations (ie: the opposite of a "daily affirmation" if you will). Whoever posts the most amusing one will receive a free copy of John S. Hall's new "Daily Negations" book. This contest ends Friday, April 6, 2007. One entry per person, please.

P.S.: We'll be at the Cannibal Flower group show for a little while tomorrow night (Saturday) at Infusion Gallery in Los Angeles. Re has a piece that's gonna be in there. So for any of you L.A. mockers, be sure to stop by and check it out!

40 Comments

I finally got a Wii!

by -RoG- on 03/21/2007, 2:04 pm

Managed to score a Nintendo Wii system of my own the other day and I'm loving it. Naturally, this means I need to share my Wii Friend Code with all of you who have Wii systems of your own, so here ya go! Make sure you post your codes in this thread too!

3127 6060 7013 2494 is WAY better than 867-5309

Survey: What are your favorite Wii games and your favorite games on the Virtual Console so far? Recommend some stuff for me to try out!

100 Comments

Ok you Irish bastards…

by -RoG- on 03/17/2007, 1:12 pm

Let's hear your favorite St. Patty's Day recipes for GREEN drinks and foods.

Are you a Leprechaun or a Leprechaun't?

29 Comments

Do you like a little MEAT with your ACTION?

by -RoG- on 03/13/2007, 11:13 am

After reading my latest "Stupid Toys" article, I-Mockery reader Destin Berthelot was nice enough to write in with a suggestion for another toy that I should include in my next installment of the series. While I'm always more than happy to listen to suggestions for any of the articles I write, I don't necessarily always agree with them. This is a perfect example of that... BEHOLD!

I'm so hungry, I could punch a frozen cow!

Your eyes do not deceive you, there is now an action figure for "The Meat" from the Rocky films. That's right, the lifeless slab of frozen meat that Rocky pummeled during his training has joined the ranks of action figures. This is far from stupid. In fact, this is fucking fantastic. A frozen slab of meat toy and they throw in a bloody smock for good measure? I wasn't even that impressed with the current line of Rocky figures (many of the faces just didn't look right), but my friends, I can guarantee you one thing: "The Meat" figure will soon be part of my collection. We need more action figures for completely random things like the meat! Personally, I'd like to see action figures for Rocky's two turtles, Cuff and Link. What other "action figures" would you guys like to see released?

Go Kevin Keene! Show Mother Brain who's boss with your Nintendo Zapper!

In DVD news, while I'm still eagerly awaiting the release of "Twin Peaks: Season 2" next month, I'm happy to report that they've finally released "Captain N: The Game Master" entire series on DVD! Actually, it's not the "entire" series, it's more like the first two seasons (there were 34 episodes total, but this set has 26... still pretty damned good). They couldn't include the rest of the episodes due to legal reasons, which is understandable, but why they would call it "the complete series" on the DVD set is beyond me. To those of you who don't know much about this show, it was basically every NES fanboy's dream back in the day. Well, that and "The Wizard" of course. Anyway, it was a cartoon in which a teenager is brought into the world of Videoland to help some of your favorite video game characters fight off the bad guys (led by Mother Brain from Metroid). It was a fun cartoon and it had all sorts o' characters found in the games including King Hippo, Kid Icarus, Eggplant Wizard, Dr. Wily, Ganon, Donkey Kong and more.

In celebration of the release of Captain N, I'm holding a contest in the I-Mockery forums where YOU get to become Captain N by inserting a picture of yourself into any video game you like. All you gotta do is take a photograph of yourself and then put it into a screenshot of your favorite video game in an attempt to make it look like you're interacting with what's happening on the screen. I've included a sample of myself inserted into the classic "Defender" game so you guys can see exactly what I mean.

The winner of this contest will receive a brand-spankin' new copy of "Captain N: The Game Master" on DVD! All the rules and details for this contest have been posted in the official thread, so be sure to check it out and then get your entries turned in before the deadline (April 15th). Good luck all!

25 Comments

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