I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

[MetalMilitia]

How the hell can you make a ~20 page children's book into a film?

[Tadao]

I dont know, but it's been so long since I've read it, I wouldn't remember anything from it anyways.

[MetalMilitia]

Actually come to think of it you can really make anything into a film. They'll just need a lot of filler.

[Kitsa]

I had a bad situation today.

I was cleaning the garage when a little girl down the street (who shouldn't have been home alone, but was) decided to take her not-at-all-trained dog for a walk (shouldn't have been out at all, but it was). The dog got as far as my duplex when it decided to try and attack the neighbor's dog. It was snapping and snarling and barking, this kid who couldn't have been older than 7 or 8 was being dragged on her butt behind it because she couldn't control it, and I was the only adult in the area until the neighbor started screaming at her. And then he left and she was sitting with this dog, bawling in my driveway.

I mean, what the hell can you do? I was no more capable of handling the dog than she was, but I grabbed the dog near the collar and helped her walk it back home.

Bad, bad situation that could've gotten ugly so fast.

What the hell was a kid that young doing home alone with a dog like that?

[b_squared]

If I worked in your neighborhood I would probally be paying the parents and dog owners a visit.

Your lucky you did not have to break up a dog fight, because that is a good way to get bit.

[Kitsa]

social worker?

[MetalMilitia]

Contract killer.

[MetalMilitia]

Happy Birthday Kitsa.

[Kitsa]

Thanks :)

[Dixie]

oh happy birthday kitsa!!!
:)
i did not know

[Tadao]

Happy Kitsa day! BTW, you shouldn't look at that as a bad situation. Remember when we were kids? Hell we were the original latch key generation! I used to fight with my brother with nunchicks in the middle of the street with no adults to be found. We had many stitches and many "bad situations".

You handled it like a good block mommy and when the little girl looks at you as her hero, don't break her heart.

[Babs]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KITSA!!! I'M ALREADY WASTED FOR YOU!!! GET NAUGHTY WITH IT POOP DAWG!

[Kitsa]

LOL, thanks. I think my birthday may or may not have actually happened last weekend when it was most convenient for those around me...that's when the cake and lunch happened. But what the hell, might as well stretch it out.

In your FACE, "terminal" cancer at age 3!

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Happy Birthday Kitsa! Glad I made it back in time for it.

[b_squared]

Happy Birthday Kitsa!

Contract Killer :)

Close enough, it's animal control, humane society, spca or whatever you call it where you live.

[Colonel Flagg]

Happy Birthday Kit. Go wild.

:rave

[Kitsa]

Ah, lol. Thanks.

I feel really bad for the dog. It just runs around that yard all day, and it's a herding dog so it goes absofuckinglutely nuts. It's small but very muscular and there was no way in hell that kid could control it. She shouldn't have tried, but she's a kid, and kids can be dumb.

I think when my neighbor screamed at her it scared her, hopefully she won't try it again.

[WhiteRat]

For your birthday are you going top on or off?

[Kitsa]

So far, on. But the night is young.

I don't know. After I had kids, topless is not the attractive thing it might have been before. I'd probably jump, smack myself in the forehead and wake up the next afternoon.

:(

The following conversation happened at dinner:

MOM: Did you hear that Obama's going to fuck with American Idol?

Me: (silent for a moment) ...what?

MOM: Did you hear Obama's fucking with American Idol again?

Me: ...what do you mean, "fucking with American Idol"?

MOM: Well, he's going to have some primetime address or something. He said he would do it.

My mom, who has a thing for American Idol, seems to believe Obama is personally fucking with its scheduling just to piss her off, lol.

[Colonel Flagg]

All presidents have a thing for addressing the nation in primetime. It goes with the job that they pre-empt your favorite show, like "Survivor" or "Who wants to be a Millionaire?" or some other craptastic suckfest. So tell your mom that it's all part of his evil plan to take over the world! :p

[Kitsa]

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/blooper.jpg



Yeah, I know. My parents dislike Obama so they're always primed for the next good reason to hate him. And now he's fucked with American Idol. ;)

Me, I didn't like either candidate, to tell you the truth.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I started working my new schedule yesterday and it's a bit of an adustment. I used to work from 2pm - 11pm and now work 9ap - 6pm. It's going to be a bit rough for the first week at least.


Four more threads till 30,000.

[Aaarg]

haaaay guys it's the first day of spring.

LET YOUR UNHAPPINESS MELT AWAY. HURRAH.

[Shrubfest]

I missed Kitsa's birthday. :(

I'm sorry. I was drinking. Is that ok?

[Babs]

YOU CAN NOT MISS KITSA'S BIRTHDAY, NO REDEMPTION FOR YOU.

[Kitsa]

The way I look at it, the majority of the world missed my birthday and the sun went right on rising.

Being drunk is the best homage I can think of, so don't sweat it. Thanks.

[Tadao]

http://cdn-www.i-am-bored.com/media/84696_wantedgirl.jpg

[Babs]

you still have the good ol' i-mockery forums where you can come and hate life just a little bit more

[Kitsa]

It's a tall order to hate it much more.

At least I heard back from someone today; they've been ignoring me for weeks and I gots to get paid :(

[Tadao]

What month is your showing? Oh and my bento request still stands.

[Tadao]

dang dude my friend theresa lives there i will send her to look at games and get me something good ! you will see this woman

http://i60.photobucket.com/albums/h36/supercoolrobotgo/thatsshot.jpg
when do you work so i can send her by there

I need to own my own retro game store. :x


: pub

[Kitsa]

I think it's in July unless I get bumped again :( The book is "at the printer's" now.

I was in some Brazilian paper the other day apparently and I got all of these emails in what looks like Portuguese->English babelfish. I don't know how people track me down but they do.

I've been trying to figure out what a piece of "Tadao" food art should be and I've been drawing a total blank :(

[Tadao]

Not only that, it has to be Boyfriend acceptable :o

[Kitsa]

lol

[Babs]

shit, there's no way I read the post before me but I'm surper fucking wasted and I forgot ym friends so I have to go drive 8 more miles to get them and i allmost got pulled over but like the thread sead I'm drinking til my heart stops and i'm eatin and driving so SUE ME GET WASTED TIL YOU CAN'T PISS GREEN

[executioneer]

i dont think your piss is supposed to be green to begin with, i think you're eating too much blue food coloring :(

[Tadao]

I bet your head hurts today Babs.

[Kitsa]

I saw a nascar fan in a truck today with INTIMIDATER spelled out in big decal letters across the back window.

At first I thought it was a delightful pun, but after seeing the guy (and those little Dale decals with the halos all over his truck)...I doubt it.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

LOL, my Arabian friend has The Arabinator on his.

[Big McLargehuge]

For some reason it bugs the fuck out of me when people refer to Arabs as Arabians. It is technically correct but it seems somehow wrong.

[Babs]

they don't deserve to be called arabians.

[Kitsa]

I could see it differentiating an Arab from someone from Saudi Arabia.

I've never known any Saudi Arabians, so I don't know what they prefer.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I'll ask him next time. He's never mentioned it before.

I've known him since I was 12 and didn't realize he was Arabian/Arab until we were 19 though. I just assumed he was Italian. Apparently there were a few of our close friends that just never knew either so for Halloween that year he dressed up like a Sultan with a scimitar.

[Kitsa]

When I was in a college "youth" program, I and the other 13 year olds were shepherded around by a Kuwaiti guy named Ammar. Ammar was awesome.

He was supposed to take us to an outdoor concert once, and we stopped at Little Caesar's to get pizza to take. That was back during their Pizza Pizza days where you got 2 of everything. (I think they stopped that, didn't they?) Anyway, he ordered our pizzas and drinks and of course they gave him double.

He was freaked out and trying to give them back the extra pizzas. "No, you do not understand, I order..." It was hilarious. I think we walked out of there with 6 pizzas and I don't know how many drinks (back when they were in the cartons) and orders of breadsticks. We ended up giving a lot of it away.

[kahljorn]

Yea that's like how i hate when they call nigers nigerians i mean what the hell.

I actually hate the word ARAB because people always say, "A" "RAB" like they are two separate words.

[Kitsa]

Well, the one Nigerian I know refers to herself as Igbo (EE-bo) because tribal affiliation is really, really fucking important there.

[kahljorn]

Well, that's good, I guess.

[Big McLargehuge]

Tell that to the Tutsis :(

[Kitsa]

Really, she's pretty badass. She fought in the Nigerian Civil war and personally witnessed the Bar Beach Executions (http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,911769,00.html). She said that criminals would just be randomly picked...didn't matter if they were murderers, rapists, pickpockets, political prisoners, whatever...chained to oil drums, and then the death squad would just open fire.

[Babs]

Those barbaric insignificants, they will pay for their actions.

[kahljorn]

That's my kind of niger

[Babs]

Carnivore is wasted right now everyone, it is very entertaining to say the least.

Oh by the way, she pee'd on a tree for the 3rd time.

[Tadao]

:rolleyes

[Dixie]

PEEEE ONNNNN YOUUU ALLLLLLL

[executioneer]

You people are the rudest pricks I've ever met on the internet:imock

[executioneer]

YOU CANT PEE ON ME ILL PEE ON YOU

[Babs]

the only thing that will make my life complete is turning your face into a toilet seat

[Dixie]

TADAO
TALK TO MEEEEEEEEEEEE

[kahljorn]

I'll pee on all of you guys and then ill slap your wet faces with my dick and itll make loud noises and ill laugh at you >:

more girls should have wet tshirt contests with my pee

[Babs]

got me wet

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I don't like working sundays....especially sunday mornings.

[Kitsa]

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/hasabuckit.jpg

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

When I'm at work pictures don't show for me :(

[Kitsa]

Frame 1: I HAS A BUCKET

Frame 2: NO THEY BE STEALIN MAH BUCKET

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

:) Another 8 hours and I can go home and look at it.

I had some wine at dinner last night that I ordered that I can't find now. It's something like Pong de Lonc or Pon de Lonch. It's a white wine that was slightly bitter and delicious.

[Kitsa]

can you narrow it down to the type of white?

Edit: I ask because there's a category called "blanc de blanc" that's white wine made exclusively from white (green) grapes.

Edit again: Dammit I want this shirt, it works on so many levels
http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/frogs.jpg

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Maybe it's blanc de blanc. She told me was it was but when I ordered it I kinda just made it seem like I knew what I was talking about to the bartender.

sidenote: Harvey Pekar, creator of American Splendor is coming next saturday. I've never read any of them, enjoyed the movie and think he would be a generally interesting person to meet.

[Kitsa]

Harvey Pekar is incredibly cool. He appears to have a very low BS tolerance, so be forewarned.

I know there are a couple of "pon de" wines, but I don't know of any "pon de lance" or whatever. I'm not really a wine snob and don't keep up with it, I'm just vaguely conscious of what's around.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Ding! It was 2001 Sauvignon Blanc from South Africa.

[Kitsa]

lol, you're right, that sounds just like it.

I'm irritated at our local hospital. I had to go to the ER in December. My insurance negotiated the cost down and paid all but a couple hundred, which is lucky for me because there's no way in hell I could have done it all myself.

As it is, I'm happy to pay down the balance steadily. However, it's not as quick as they want. I've sent two checks in two months with all I can afford to pay each month (no, I'm not sending smartass checks for $2 or anything). They sent me a letter commanding me to call to make "acceptable payment arrangements". I went through that a few months earlier and they won't settle for anything less than the bill being paid off in large chunks I can't afford. So I sent in another check. Which they've cashed.

Then they sent me a colorful (bright orange paper) "second notice" bill for the full amount, no credit for what I've paid, threatening to send me to collections.

Then the next day, a "collections notice" on bright pink paper.

I'm irritated. I've sent them two checks in two months, which they've cashed, and not "under protest" (what you're supposed to write if you dispute the method or terms). Now they've put me on the fast track to "collections" for the total amount, not even giving me credit for what I've paid?

Grrrrrr.

So now I have to call and argue with them tomorrow, and I'm getting angry thinking about it because I know they're going to try and bully me into paying the full balance and I just can't.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

At the very least they should credit you for the amount you've paid already.

[Kitsa]

That was also my opinion.

The fact that they're dicks and inflexible on how much I send is one thing. But at least credit me for what I've paid. As I said, they weren't tiny smartass amounts.

[Babs]

COLLECTIONS!!!!!

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

You could always try calling the hospital, say you spoke with collections and say they're okay with the amount you're paying. Not sure how long that'll work for though.

[Kitsa]

well, the hitch in that is if they sell the debt to a collections agency, the agency usually takes over the payments (to a different address).

It irritates me that they haul out this "collections" thing so quickly, especially when I've been making not-insignificant payments.

[MetalMilitia]

I think "significant" was the word you were looking for there :p

[Kitsa]

...no. Not-insignificant. I have been making not-insignificant payments, as in they have not been piddly one-or-two-dollar payments.

[MetalMilitia]

I find that logic not-unreasonable, I guess.

[Kitsa]

my writing style is not for everyone.

I'm sure some sort of analysis would reveal that it shows me to be a negative person.

Or I'm not sure it won't.

[Tadao]

I believe that you can't go to collections for hospital bills if you send them a good faith payment of 20 dollars a month. It might even be less. I don't think it is just a California thing either. They threaten collections but I think there is an exception for medical.

[Kitsa]

That was my understanding from when I worked in a hospital. These cretins have no honor.

[Tadao]

Well, at least it wont ruin your credit. Not like you have an use for credit. I know I don't.

[Kitsa]

I have no use for credit. My ex saw to that.

[Babs]

I believe credit is one of the worst things to ever happen to society. It's more safe to play with fire inside your house then playing with you credit. Remember this kids.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Credit isn't so bad. Majority of the time it's used will ill intent though. I have credit available in case of emergencies but I try and contain any frivolous spending. I had to learn that the hard way.

[Kitsa]

My decisions to avoid all future excursions into the world of debt and the world of matrimony happened pretty much simultaneously.

I watch Bridezillas like people watch car racing...for the inevitable crash.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

can you narrow it down to the type of white?

Edit: I ask because there's a category called "blanc de blanc" that's white wine made exclusively from white (green) grapes.

Edit again: Dammit I want this shirt, it works on so many levels
http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/frogs.jpg

:lol

[Tadao]

I'm watching a movie on SciFi called RAGING SHARKS. The opening scene was aliens fighting in space and the sharks in the movie growl like tigers underwater. This is awesome.

[kahljorn]

i owe the hospitol a ton of money cause they act like they are gonna cover me and then ten months later they send a notice basically saying, "YOU FORGOT TO SIGN YOUR NAME ON THIS LINE. SO YOU OWE US TEN THOUSANDS DOLLARS."

I'm never paying those jerkoffs. I didn't ask for their help.

[kahljorn]

Man there was this lady at my work today who drove me crazy. She was hanging out with a bunch of guys who were in their mid twenties, and while her facial features looked kind of young, and her body was fit, her skin was wrinkling all over the fucking place. She was also a an annoying customer.
Then towards the end she started talking to other people in line about how she used to be a subway employee and shit. And she had this fucking CACKLE. a straight up annoying fucking CACKLE LAUGH and she wouldn't stop she was like one of those people you get them to start laughing and they don't stop and they sound like they're gonna hyperventilate >:.

She must've been on meth or somethin

[Kitsa]

you sound like you're in a bad mood this evening, kahl.

[kahljorn]

not really ;o

[Kitsa]

I should really go take the dog for a walk because it's nice out, but I overdid the yardwork this afternoon and I have no energy :(

[Babs]

hahaha i just had an amazing time. I thought it would be a good idea to take this radio flyer I had and ride it down this soap box track by my house. It was pretty fun but then I got bored and decided to go down the grassy hill, well the wheel came off and I almost ate the biggest dick sandwhich. Stay tuned for pictures soon!

[Tadao]

Pics of a dick sandwich? :yum

[Babs]

Only the tastiest ones. :orgasm

[Kitsa]

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/enjoy.jpg

"And now, here's something you'll really enjoy."

http://www.buzzfeed.com/expresident/boob-machine (NSFW)

[Babs]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v424/LifeInMono/wagonhill.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v424/LifeInMono/miracleinlane2copy.jpg

OH MAN! it was so awesome when Frankie came out to support his role in his awesome movie Miracle in Lane 2. He came and took off his shirt and began chugging milk proving that he's in fact a machine.

[Aaarg]

the fact that your location is a tom waits lyric makes me enjoy you

BTW WHERE DO YOU LIVES , looks gloomy !!

[Babs]

I live in Columbus, Ohio and right now the weather can not decide on anything.

[Aaarg]

oh yeah, I think I knew that. I know/knew a few people from there. fuck Ohio!

[Babs]

Yeah, it's a complete piece of shit. All the people around here are turds except for a couple of people, they're part of the exception.

[Aaarg]

Basically when I think of Columbus two specific people come to mind:
1. a young man who is deathly afraid of spiders. His dream is to become a professional fisherman (so much so that in his 21.5 years on this earth, he's only had one job (because he had to get an internship)), yet he won't go into ankle-deep water without wearing waders.
2. a fat girl who is a senior in college but can't spell words like "maybe" (maby), "does" (dose), or "bagel" (begal).

[Babs]

Sounds more like Virginia you're talking about. :lol

I'm just kidding but yeah, seems like those might be some backwoods rejects.

[Aaarg]

Well, to be fair, they were both attending West Virginia University for the Wildlife/Fisheries program.

I'm not really a Virginian. I'm a northern Virginian. I love Virginia. I loathe northern Virginia.

VIRGINIA IS FOR LOVERS, FUCK YOU!

[Babs]

WE ARE THE BIRTHPLACE OF AVIATION!!!

GO OSU BUCKEYES!!1!!! FOOTBALL YEAH O-H-I-O HELLLL YEAHHH!!!1!1!! BROHIO!!!!!!

[Aaarg]

Brohio, oh Jeeeesus.

I can't really say too much about Ohio, though. Canton's the only place I've been to for more than 12 hours.

[Kitsa]

Where the hell in Columbus is there a track like that? Not over by Children's, too skeevy an area.

Ohio is just like anywhere else...nothing wrong with the land, just the people.

[WhiteRat]

Anyone hear anything about Pac-Man and that whole kiddie porn thing? He hasn't posted since the 12th and frankly i'm a bit worried that we won't be seeing him for a while.

[Tadao]

Last I heard, he was drunk and had just talked to his ex and was feeling a little pissy about ****** jokes. I didn't hear anything about kiddie porn :(

[WhiteRat]

hopefully he comes around, I happen to like the lil' bugger.

[Tadao]

Yeah, just as we all got comfortable with him... :tear

[kahljorn]

what happened with him and kiddie porn?

[Tadao]

I think WhiteRat let something slip :eek

[kahljorn]

he doesn't strike me as the type to be into that kinda stuff so hopefully THERE IS NO GROSS INJUSTICE IN THE WORLD WHICH IS BEING TARGETTED AT HIM

[Tadao]

Yeah, I instantly thought his crazy ex set him up or something. I know all kinds are into that, but I just don't see Pacman being into it. I think he likes thick white women.

[Babs]

holy shit kiddie porn what the hell is wrong with this forum.

[Dixie]

There's one of those in every group, man.

[WhiteRat]

Sorry, made that part up in the hopes that he would quickly come here to post in his defense.

It was actually Tadao that was looking at dirty and illegal things on the internet.

[Fathom Zero]

It'd suck having an illegal fetish, though.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I think Pac has trouble with his computer every once in a while. He was gone for two weeks a few months ago. Maybe he smashed his ex with it.



Chojin: Do you have it set so you average 6.66 posts a day or are you just evil?

[Tadao]

It was actually Tadao that was looking at dirty and illegal things on the internet.


Was?

[wobzire]

Hold the fuck up! You can get in trouble for LOOKING at things now?

[wobzire]

Not that I look at anything on the internet except for LOLcats heh ha...

[Esuohlim]

right on brah

[Esuohlim]

pound it

[Sam]

bump my knuckles

[wobzire]

friendly pat on the bum

[Chojin]

Chojin: Do you have it set so you average 6.66 posts a day or are you just evil?

It was Bape's idea.

[Tadao]

Sup Eric? Sam said he is mod material. :rolleyes

[Chojin]

Hey Tadao.

Good idea, let's mod half the forums.

[Kitsa]

Being a mod can make a place stop being fun. That's what happened with me and a forum I used to frequent. Not only did you constantly have to deal with all the idiotic spam posts, but it was a pain in the ass to move things from one forum to another. People either kissed your ass, whined to you about nonsense shit, or both.

[Babs]

sounds like fun

[Kitsa]

I lost a thread once :(

[Chojin]

Usually it's Rog who gets whined to about my behavior. He's like my e-dad.

[Tadao]

I would hate to be a mod in a scrapbook forum.

[Kitsa]

I would hate to be a mod in a scrapbook forum.


I wouldn't; I'd take the opportunity to ban everyone on General Fucking Principle.

[wobzire]

Dont get scapbookers angry. They will cut you with their curvy scissors.

[Kitsa]

I just heard this weird, wild honking and went outside. There were three Canada geese beating the fuck out of each other in midair over my house. No apparent reason, no other geese in sight.

Really strange. Maybe we're going to have an earthquake or something.

[kahljorn]

Maybe they were fuckin

[Tadao]

RAPE

[Kitsa]

If they were, it was a loud fucking threesome with much shedding of feathers.

[kahljorn]

It wasn't a threesome they were fighting over mates

trust me on this I know how geese think

even canadian ones

[wobzire]

Don't get Canada Geese angry either. They will also cut you.

[Babs]

Not to long ago, I saw this kid start blaring preset 3 on his Fischer Price toy boom box and he proceeded to break dance on the concrete and get some amazing road rash all over his face. It was beautiful to see such failure.

[wobzire]

Holy shit! Really? Even if your not telling the truth that's sweet.

[Tadao]

Even the poorest kids put down cardboard first. What was he? 5 years old?

[Babs]

I would say 8 years old. He was such a little brat, I remember he was trying to steal something out of my yard and I caught him, he then decided to run and thought he was gone YEAH THE HELL RIGHT, I chucked this rock about 30 yards and it slammed right into his dome piece. Made me feel good about myself.

[Aaarg]

i'm glad you guys seem to realize that they are in fact canada geese and not "canadian geese"

[Otto]

My old neighbors used to have a mentally retarded son that they would lock outside for about three hours every day and as soon as he was out of the door, he would run into my front lawn and start screaming at the top of his lungs. One day I decided that I'd had enough and put on a cheap skull mask and scared him away.

[Tadao]

http://blogs.sltrib.com/burger/uploaded_images/Breeders-719360.jpg

Breeding is so unnecessary right now.

[executioneer]

i hope i burst a capillary in my brain soon

[kahljorn]

man i scored two tutoring jobs outside of school. One of them's going to pay 12 dollars an hour, and raise it to 15 if I'm helping him a lot. He also offered bonuses depending on what grade he gets.

The other i dunno but whatever its tax free ;o

[kahljorn]

Man I'm so fucking bored

[Kitsa]

Kahl...not to be negative, but watch out with the ones who dangle "bonuses"....I had a few of those who promised BIG bonuses if only I'd write papers for them, etc.

[Colonel Flagg]

Get your payments in cash, per session. Just a suggestion.

[Esuohlim]

Is the new Nintendo DSi seriously just a DS with a camera in it

[Tadao]

The must have teamed up with Apple.

[Pub Lover]

One time I got my sister so drunk that she passed out and then I busted my seed in her. I didn't tell her about it till our kids 5th birthday. Ah man, you should have seen the look on her face. Priceless!

What kind of seed? :eek

I hope it was pumpkin. :)

[Tadao]

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Avatars/fatcat_dance.gifWE MISSED YOU!http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Avatars/fatcat_dance.gif

[wobzire]

Omigash pub is back!

[Tadao]

Don't count on it!

[Babs]

you little seed buster you

[Tadao]

KITSA, can I submit Chloe to cute overload? I bet she will be famous.

[Kitsa]

sure, why not.

You wouldn't think she was cute if you had to deal with her barking today.

[Tadao]

They sure don't make it easy to submit pics!

[Kitsa]

let me know how it goes.

[kahljorn]

Most of these people dont seem like the type to rip somebody off, but ill see about getting it up front ;o

[Tadao]

;)

[kahljorn]

stupid 9 page research papers that have to be written in a day >:

[Dixie]

sometimes i wish we still had the NSFW thread
:(
memories.

[kahljorn]

:(

[executioneer]

well you could make a forum that is solely dedicated to nsfw pictures for imockery forumgoers

YOU COULD CALL IT WHO WANTS TO JACKET ;_; ;_; ;_;

[Dixie]

That was bad Willie, even for you.

[MetalMilitia]

http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/wherethewildthingsare/

[Tadao]

http://pictureisunrelated.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/wtf_pics-water-kid-mini-bik.jpg

I'll go see it, I might even enjoy it.

[Fathom Zero]

I'd trust Spike Jonze with my first-born, so yes.

[Babs]

Spike Jonez is my first born.

[Tadao]

I just brought back my Fu Manchu. I look like such a Mexican.

[Kitsa]

:( You can all learn something from my mistake.

If you, say, have a bucket you collect dog poop in to throw away at the end of the week when the trash is picked up....if you have such a bucket, and it's full of dogshit....don't leave it out in the rain. And then a day's worth of unseasonably hot sun.

I just had to deal with a bucket brimming with warm dogshit soup :(

I'm going to hose out the bucket and drill some holes in the bottom of it this weekend. Learned my lesson :(


How come the shit stuff always happens to me?

[Babs]

Shit loves you and you love shit

[Pub Lover]

I just brought back my Fu Manchu. I look like such a Mexican.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/urbansuicidejunkie/linkedjunk/2008/may/sandwich.jpg

Have you also got ten years younger?

[Tadao]

I wish!

[kahljorn]

i made 13 bucks tutoring today :)

the best thing about tutoring is that i learn a toooon about whatever im tutoring. I pretty much know how to tutor every kind of logic at school

[Kitsa]

I always had bad luck with tutoring. Especially when it came to the bf and math. I'd try to show him how to choose an equation or something, and he'd be like uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh you do it.

I took the dog out for a 15 min walk so we could both say we got exercise today. We've got this guy who moved in with his mom 2 doors down. The guy is middle-aged and has a loud burgundy chopper my bf calls the "Fartcopter". It does sound like an exact cross between a helicopter and a loud, blatting fart. It's pretty obnoxious, especially at night.

Anyway, the dog was doing well until we heard the roar of the Fartcopter, and then she started bucking and trying to run. It was a bad 50 feet or so getting her back to the house, and she ran into the crate and waited for me to shut the door. Apparently the Fartcopter is terrifying.

[Tadao]

Cesar would say that the dog is reacting to your reaction to the motorcycle.

[Kitsa]

My reaction to the motorcycle would be a middle finger if I wasn't in such a fucking defective body that I'm sure would lose a fight. I'm not enamoured of the guy.

[Tadao]

I only believe half of what Cesar says anyways.

[Kitsa]

He seems like a genuinely good guy, though.

[Tadao]

Yeah, he really is in tune with what a dog needs. But I'm not the guy who thinks animals can feel your feelings the way he says. I don't think he really believes it too. But he sells it to some degree. Maybe because it helps people project what the want onto the dog.

[Kitsa]

I just figured out today my dog will eat carrots.

I've been giving her baby carrots as treats. She really does think she's a horse.

[Tadao]

I tried to get mine to eat lettuce. He'll eat veggies, just not lettuce.

[Kitsa]

They say that most veggies except for onions, broccoli and garlic are okay.

[Tadao]

I have heard rumor that avocado is not that good for animals too. I bet the mango people spread that rumor.

[Kitsa]

I know avocado is supposed to be a latex cross-allergen. But it never gave me a problem.

[Tadao]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avocado#Toxicity_to_animals

yeah I guess it's not the meat of the avocado but everything else.

[executioneer]

That was bad Willie, even for you.

i was making a reference to the old ezboard days when there actually was such a board, but ezboard shut it down cause they don't allow porno :(

[Chojin]

the best thing about tutoring is that i learn a toooon about whatever im tutoring. I pretty much know how to tutor every kind of logic at school

the best thing about tutoring isn't learning a ton about whatever you're tutoring, it's letting everyone online know you did.

[Chojin]

Is the new Nintendo DSi seriously just a DS with a camera in it

Of course not - it also can't play GBA games.

[kahljorn]

the best thing about tutoring isn't learning a ton about whatever you're tutoring, it's letting everyone online know you did.

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/images/mockery/buttons/quote.gif (http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=621752)
Don't get all jealous cause you're a dumbass, chojin. I CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR SUBPAR INTELLIGENCE.

[LordSappington]

I just got back from the Austin Rodeo '09. I'm terribly disappointed I forgot my camera; there were so many insane rides. They had several rotating, flipping arm rides, one of those straight loops that just go around on a car, and even one of those centrifugal UFO rides. That was by far my favorite; I almost got kicked out of the fair for turning myself upside down.

[kahljorn]

THE BEST THING ABOUT IT THOUGH WAS TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT IT ON THE INTERNET

RIGHT?
RIGHT?

[WhiteRat]

Nothing beats two god damn tornado warnings for my entire county for the second morning in a row.

[Kitsa]

kahl: are you claiming to have superpar intelligence? :P

[Esuohlim]

http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/5090/screensavers.png

MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I almost got kicked out of the fair for turning myself upside down.


They hate that big time. This lady got really mad at me because I managed to get upside before the ride even started.

[kahljorn]

Not anymore than anybody else who mimics jackasses...

[Kitsa]

There are two strange women at my door, ringing the doorbell, ignoring my NO SOLICITATION sign. I'm not answering. Fuck them if they can't read :(

[Tadao]

Maybe they are not soliciting.

[kahljorn]

maybe you should answer and tell them no soliciting.

THEN SLAM THE DOOR IN THEIR FACE >:

[kahljorn]

YOU CANT SOLICIT THE LORD

thats jst MINSTRATING

[Tadao]

You need rottweiler barks on a cassette tape volume 5

[Kitsa]

I just called my mom down the street and she apparently already had a fight with them.

DING DONG

MOM: (opening door) I have a no soliciting sign.

TWO WOMEN: Oh, we're not soliciting. We want to tell you about an important event at the Kingdom Hall...

MOM: You are soliciting, you're selling your religion. I'm not interested. (slams door in their faces)


I went and opened my door and I've got an "invitation" to a Very Special Event at my local Kingdom Hall of JWs on April 9.

My ex was a JW. I dislike them very much for peddling religion door to door.

[Tadao]

Such a waste of paper.

[Kitsa]

I collect them. I figure the worst thing I can do to them dignity-wise is save up a bunch and turn the lot over to a bunch of first-year anthropology students to make fun of.

Still have my "fornicator" booklet from that garage sale last year.

[Babs]

I'm heading for Indiana today! FINALLY OUT OF OHIO, but sadly it's only for an hour :(

[Zomboid]

Back when I had long hair and a goatee, I was waiting for at a bus stop and this lady gave me a pamphlet to SAVE ME. I kept it and read it every night!

[Kitsa]

be sure to pick up some CANDLES AND FIREWORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!

srsly be careful in Eaton, they bust people coming back over the border. They live for it.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Do It To It!

[Babs]

fireworks, gotta have em

[Kitsa]

Apparently I need to add to my sign outside the door. It currently says NO SOLICITATION, THANK YOU. I just printed up a new one:

NO SOLICITING
THIS INCLUDES:
- RELIGIOUS VISITS/INVITES
- SURVEYS/PETITIONS
- DOOR TO DOOR SALES
- DOOR TO DOOR NONPROFITS


Because what I've been running into the past few weeks is that people seem to keep exempting themselves from the "solicitation" label, and it's pissing me off.

The other night some guy actually walked door to door IN THE RAIN to try and get money for a make-a-wish ripoff that didn't even sound real. I told him no thank you and left him in the rain.

I hate the door to door thing. I really, really hate it. I used to get in fights with my teachers over school fundraisers because I'd bring the participation levels way down. No one should be doing that shit.

[Babs]

I need to post the no soliciting religious visits, reason being is because smack dab in the middle of my subdivision is a mormon church. They come up to my door just about everyday in there little tidy suites talking about Joseph Smith and his god dam plates and how he deciphers that shit in one month. It's annoying and pathetic, makes me glad that atleast I'm not prancing around wasting my life going door to door for some shit guy.

[kahljorn]

i hate people who go door to door to get money for their cousins funeral and always have an old black and white printed picture of them.

Or those shit eating kids who sell candy for their church and their parents are always lookin at you like, YOU BETTER BUY IT ITS A CHILD FOR CHRISTS SAKE DONT RUIN THEIR HOPE OF BEING AN ANNOYING SALEMEN IN PARKINGLOTS IN FRONT OF BUSINESSES. and i always see the same kids doing it and they do it year round ;\

[Kitsa]

"Future Mormon missionary" baby bib:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=sr_gallery_15&listing_id=16932987&ga_search_query=mormon&ga_search_type=tag_title&ga_page=3&min=&max=&order=

This is the sign I REALLY want:
http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/engrish.jpg

[Lenor]

I was assuming this was a thread about drinking, apparently I am quite mistaken.

Willie must be sad...

GOLDSLAUGER BITCHES!

[Tadao]

You should post a new pic. I bet you got fat.

[Lenor]

Actually... no

but I'll post a new pic anyway..

[Tadao]

The end justifies the means. ;)

[Lenor]

And I don't remember who you are, does that justify anything to your means?

[Tadao]

Not knowing anything about me gives me the advantage, so yes it does.

[Lenor]

So, your implying being a stalker is ok?

[Tadao]

:lol not at all :rolleyes

[Lenor]

I posted a pic so you can stop pulling a milhouse :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

[Tadao]

That wasn't a pic, that was a disaster.

[Lenor]

So are you, but....

[Tadao]

I can't decide who needs make up more.

[Kitsa]

I went to a drive-thru ice cream place and there were a bunch of idiot fucktard teenagers waving madly at us through the restaurant window as we drove past, so I waved like a fucktard back and made them feel alive!

[Tadao]

That's right. Back down. Now pm me you A cups.

[Kitsa]

Do you have something against small-breasted women, Tadao?

[Tadao]

My cock usually.

[Kitsa]

oho

glad I'm safe then!

[Babs]

WAStedDD!!!!!!!

[RaNkeri]

:rolleyes

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I don't know if I have pink eye or if I just scratched my cornea. I'm hoping for the latter.

[Fathom Zero]

Nothing force on Earth or in the heavens could get me to touch my eye. It's the nastiest thing ever.

[RaNkeri]

I've once accidently scratched my eye with a pointy fingernail. Didn't do ay damage but it hurt like a son of a bitch

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

It's really kind of pink. I've been coughing really hard this week, hoping it's just from that. I need to cut my nails too though. I can touch my eye okay, contacts bug me out though so I don't get them.

[Kitsa]

I had contacts melt to my eyes twice. The funny thing about that was that it was under the same exact circumstances almost exactly one year apart.

[Tadao]

Yay! It's apocalypse movies on scifi today!

[Kitsa]

I think I'll make coffee jello today.

It's fun to eat it in front of people and give them the oogies, but it's actually not bad.