I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

[Kitsa]

the bottles that came with our carbonation machine smell like chlorine.

[Grislygus]

So zhukov sent me this box of awesome in return for the case of payday bars I'm about to send him and I was looking for stuff from here to include. And I can't seem to find anything that wouldn't make him shake his head sadly at our society.

ALMOND JOYS, 100 GRAND BARS, MCMENAMINS DIJON MUSTARD, AND A VINTAGE ISSUE OF HUSTLER MAGAZINE

[Grislygus]

AND A PACKAGE OF SALMON JERKY, FRESH FROM ALASKA

[Kitsa]

I got him a bunch of stuff from cracker barrel, too.

[Grislygus]

Fuck I want some salmon jerky now :( I'M NOT GONNA GET THAT SHIT IN CALIFORNIA, I CAN'T EVEN GET FRESH MUSSELS, AND OYSTERS ANYMORE >::(:(:(:(:( we're right next to the fucking OCEAN, why aren't there any decent seafood vendors in the area I AM DEPRIVED

[Otto]

Canned boiled peanuts!

[Kitsa]

they don't have salmon jerky or boiled peanuts in stores here, except at jungle jims, and if I go there I might as well send him a box of Australian groceries while I'm at it.

[Otto]

Man, as much as I hate the state I live in, I couldn't imagine living somewhere that didn't have canned boiled peanuts readily available.

[Tadao]

Fuck I want some salmon jerky now :( I'M NOT GONNA GET THAT SHIT IN CALIFORNIA, I CAN'T EVEN GET FRESH MUSSELS, AND OYSTERS ANYMORE >::(:(:(:(:( we're right next to the fucking OCEAN, why aren't there any decent seafood vendors in the area I AM DEPRIVED

S.F. buys it all before you can.

[Grislygus]

THOSE TRENDY VEGAN SHITHEADS, I'LL KILL THEM

[Colonel Flagg]

Canned boiled peanuts!

We had a (recently retired) salesman who was originally from the deep south - he loved those slimy looking turdlets, but what really hit me was when he said "Are yew shore yew don' wan' sum BALD PENIS?"

I nearly crapped in my pants. :lol

[DevilWearsPrada]

finally remembered the password for my email address and now i can post again

[DevilWearsPrada]

What did I miss besides self congratulatory masturbation and shitty inside jokes?

[Pub Lover]

Sam, don't call Fathom a number two. I'm trying to sleep, dammit. >:

[executioneer]

it's been all re-runs, man. you gotta wait for the new season to come out

[Sam]

HE'S A DEUCE.

THE DEUCE IS LOOSE.

[Fathom Zero]

Dylan
OOOO BIG MAN
WITH THE CONKER
GO TO SLEEP
YOU'RE OLD

SAM
THE GREAT MIGHTY POO
I AM OLD BITCH
SHOW SOME RESPECT

Dylan
FUCK YOU, OLDIE

SAM
I AM 25 I AM OLD ENOUGH TO BE YOUR MOTHER

Dylan
Man you are old
Jesus
Go to sleep
you don't want your back to give out

SAM
HAVE SOME MORE CAVIAR

Dylan
working the pussy 12 hours

SAM
HAVE SOME MORE CAVIAR
OH PLEASE
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW LITTLE DYLAN

Dylan
What do you do?
Lick stamps?

SAM
MY JOB CRUSHES LITTLE LADY BOYS LIKE YOU
DAILY

Dylan
With your big retarded tongue?

SAM
LITTLE LADY BOYS
NAMED DYLAN
REDUCED TO TEARS
WITH SKINT KNEES

[Sam]

SUCK IT

[Fathom Zero]

MAKE IT HAPP'N, CAP'N

[Pub Lover]

Guys, I'm 50 fucking years old & I don't need this shit. >:

[Fathom Zero]

It's like fifteen o' clock wherever you're at, you don't need sleep

[Pub Lover]

19 o'clock. >:

That shit is late at my age. :(

[Zhukov]

I was going to go to Japan late this year with a friend for a holiday, but I have changed my mind and now want to go to North Korea.

Now I have to trick my friend into thinking it is better somehow.

[Kitsa]

Of course it is. Have fun with that.

I woke up wanting guacamole and I'm not quite sure why :/

[Fathom Zero]

As long as you eat it with blue-corn tortilla chips, you're good.

[Pub Lover]

:pagebrak

[Zhukov]

Of course it is. Have fun with that.



I'm thinking about just surprising him when we arrive.

[Wiffles]

Ive read many things about North Korea, apparently the easiest way is through northern china first. you can "buy" a visa there or something. Great place, paradise utopia ^.^

[Colonel Flagg]

Don't forget to carry a placard that says "Democracy NOW!" or "Impeach Kim!" or something. They love protesters there.

EDIT: Maybe you couild look up KulturKampf while you're there. ;)

[Dimnos]

I was going to go to Japan late this year with a friend for a holiday, but I have changed my mind and now want to go to North Korea.

Now I have to trick my friend into thinking it is better somehow.

Hot traffic girls. I bet thats the key.

[Grislygus]

I woke up wanting guacamole and I'm not quite sure why :/



PREGGERS AGAIRN

[Kitsa]

I damn well better not be.

[Dimnos]

When my wife was pregnant she had a constant craving for Chipotle. Now she cant stand the stuff. Im thinking about knocking her up again. :\

[Kitsa]

I love chipotle, and I do have a buy one burrito get one free coupon (meal's still fucking $21 though after chips and drinks). Last time I went, though, all gastrointestinal hell broke loose. I think it was the sour cream :(

[Terra]

I've never eaten at a Chipotles. We have one just the next block over from work. What's your favorite burrito?

[kahljorn]

the too much rice burrito

[Kitsa]

I get a vegetarian bowl with the fajita vegetables and the green salsa. Then I scoop it up with the chips. It's very yummy, but the sour cream is a bit of a bathroom roulette thing.

[Wiffles]

Chipotle people are a bit sexist, size-ist. Esp the female servers. Ive seen them give big chipotles to guys, esp big ones. The size of babies. However they always give me a small chipotle, almost half the size of a normal one for the same money I payed. I can finish a big one too =/

[Kitsa]

My serving sizes have always been more than I can usually deal with, especially when not pregnant. I was actually looking forward to not being pregnant this summer.

Now I want avocado and starbucks doubleshots. Perhaps I'm somehow malnourished.

[Sam]

MALNOURISHED FROM THE PREGNANCY

[Grislygus]

IT'LL BE TWINS THIS TIME

[Sam]

THEY ARE GOING TO TEAR YOU IN HALFFFFFFFF

[Kitsa]

I really doubt it. Anyway, there are other reasons that people crave things. I once knew someone with pica who ate sticks of chalk like candy.

[Zhukov]

Wiffles I'd love to take you on a date to Pyongyang and watch you eat your fill on boiled grass and bark.

[Wiffles]

well they dont serve those to tourists, strictly a local cuisine. but it would be ok to see how life is like for the masses, like sample their meals and work in their fields even for a day. to see the contrast compared to our lives

[Colonel Flagg]

I drove to the emergency room last night 'cause I couldn't breathe without gagging.

I got better. :(

It's a bitch getting old.

[Kitsa]

I'm glad you got better. It sucks not being able to breathe.

Epiglottitis or something?

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

That sounds like a real bad cold.

[Zhukov]

well they dont serve those to tourists, strictly a local cuisine.
:lol

Come with me Wiffles, we will elope to DPRK. I have a good working class background and will cook whatever I can find for you. Why try it for a day when we could spend the rest of our slightly shortened lives there?

[Babs]

I drove to the emergency room last night 'cause I couldn't breathe without gagging.

I got better. :(

It's a bitch getting old.

How are you doing now?

[RaNkeri]

Miami Vice, fuck yeah

[Esuohlim]

A TURKEY IN THE TENTH FRAME, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Bowled a 117 last night. Please, keep your seats during your applause

[Esuohlim]

Miami Vice, fuck yeah

How would you like a MONTH-LONG BAN for each instance you've posted this? (HINT: IT WOULD BE A 13-MONTH BAN)

[Fathom Zero]

A TURKEY IN THE TENTH FRAME, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Bowled a 117 last night. Please, keep your seats during your applause

:rock

[Tadao]

My dad just gave me a lesson on Japan before, during, and after ww2 and why things are like they are with his generation of Asians. Fucking wow.

[Kitsa]

I'm sincerely beginning to wonder if the asshat rednecks on either side of us are actively trying to run us out. I mean, we've had arrows fired into our yard, car repair done on the fucking front lawn, and the guy on one side deliberately tries to goad my dog into going nuts by setting his two little yappers after her. Then he stands there and watches like it's an entertaining TV show.

This morning he climbed the freeway wall and hung a damn flag on a metal pole on top of the wall. There's nothing really keeping it from flying off. Someone on the freeway's going to get killed.

This place would be great if it weren't for the damned idiot rednecks.

[MarioRPG]

Well, if they haven't invited you along for a cross burning, that's an indicator too...

[Kitsa]

considering that I didn't think to hide the manischewitz boxes and kedem bottles in the recycle bin after passover, I think we'd probably have a front row seat to any cross burning they decided to throw :/

[Tadao]

Kitty Kat, we have all told you to move the fuck out of hicksville. Your right to bitch is now revoked. :tear

[Tadao]

Mom just measured. 17 inches of full luscious black Japanese hair is going out to cancer baldies soon.

[Colonel Flagg]

Mom just measured. 17 inches of full luscious black Japanese hair is going out to cancer baldies soon.

Good for you. :)

[Tadao]

I wish I could hug a cancer ridden kid as they get my awesome hair placed on their little shiny dome.

[Tadao]

stupid dying kids

[Colonel Flagg]

I'm glad you got better. It sucks not being able to breathe.

Epiglottitis or something?

That sounds like a real bad cold.

How are you doing now?

Thanks for the well-wishes. :)

After getting some much needed z's I'm feeling pretty good. Actually I never really felt BAD either, except for the whole not-being-able-to-breathe thing.

@kit & 10K - The Doc called it uvulitis and pharyngitis, which is to say he saw swelling in both areas of the throat. Not a strep infection, but to be on the safe side they put me on Amox, then for the swelling Prednisone.

@babs - It took about 12 hours, but eventually the swelling went down to where it felt almost normal.

Now I need to rest my voice so I can talk normally again. Everyone around me will be very pleased - I have been accused of not being very subtle in the volume department. :\

[Kitsa]

cant move, too many extenuating circumstances. What I want is for THEM to move back to whatever oilpan-dumping, teeth-optional hellhole they came from >:

[Emu]

I wish I could hug a cancer ridden kid as they get my awesome hair placed on their little shiny dome.

What's stopping you?

[Colonel Flagg]

What I want is for THEM to move back to whatever oilpan-dumping, teeth-optional hellhole they came from >:

Unfortunately, "I was here first" doesn't work, :(

Here's a thought. Start a blog called "the worlds worst neighbors" and post pictures and videos of them doing really stupid crap. If it gets real popular, it could provide a separate source of income for you. The bonus - if they are as redneck as you say, they're unlikely to ever realize it exists, so they'll keep giving you new material.

[Kitsa]

yes, but if they did find out, I'd get sued the next time they needed beer money.

[Tadao]

My hairs in the mail and I look like a nazi. :O

[Kitsa]

an azn nazi, that's something I'd like to see

[Tadao]

Miso Soup Nazi

[Tadao]

I look like a grey. :(

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Human/IMG_6443.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

BFFT WAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA :lol

[Tadao]

Best Friend for Today?

[Tadao]

:(

[The Leader]

Holy fuck.

[The Leader]

There's a dog in that picture.

[WhiteRat]

I'm going to take an extremely hot shower while drinking an ice cold beer.

UPDATES COMING SOON

[Pub Lover]

Wiffles I'd love to take you on a date to Pyongyang and watch you eat your fill on boiled grass and bark.

Come with me Wiffles, we will elope to DPRK. I have a good working class background and will cook whatever I can find for you. Why try it for a day when we could spend the rest of our slightly shortened lives there?

Tasmanians are so charming. :love

[Pub Lover]

I look like a grey. :(

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Human/IMG_6443.jpg

Take it off! :orgasm

[Grislygus]

I'm going to take an extremely hot shower while drinking an ice cold beer.

UPDATES COMING SOON

I know I've done that before but I was too drunk to notice that it might be unusual

[Grislygus]

Tadao, my friend; You have Olive Oyl's arms.

[Tadao]

OH POPEYE! :love

[Grislygus]

WHERESMA GAWDDAMN SPINACH

I AIN'T GOIN FOR NO REHAB

[Terra]

I look like a grey. :(

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Human/IMG_6443.jpg


Oh snap. Even your dog is abandoning ship.

Cute face though. One I want to pee on. :D

[Guitar Woman]

He's got that "Aging Rockstar" quality about him.

[Tadao]

HAH! GW actually found humor!

[Guitar Woman]

I don't post on this website enough these days.

Hey guys.

[captain516]

Heh. Nice.

[Fathom Zero]

Best Friend for Today?

bfft is the sound of laugh that's trying to escape, while you're trying to hold your mouth closed.

[Fathom Zero]

Man that one picture of Grace Jones is hot, even if every other picture of her looks mean and scary.

[Tadao]

One man! Controls the stallion
Two men! Can tame the stallion
Three men! Can harness the stallion

[Tadao]

I AM THE STALLION MANG

[Guitar Woman]

Woah, dude, he's The Stallion!

Dude! He's The Stallion!

[Tadao]

Look out you son of a bitch
Goddamn motherfucker
Do you know who you're fucking with?

You're fucking with the stallion, mang.
You're fucking with the goddamn, mang.
You're fucking with the stallion, mang.

Goddamn piece of shit.
On my dick you should sit.
Do you know who you're fucking with?

Prancing stallion. Oh ho handsome. Prancing on the grass.

I'm the fucking stallion, mang.
The stallion.
I'm the fucking stallion, mang.
The stallion.
I am the stallion, mang.
You get it?
I am the stallion, mang.
You get it?

You see the damn stallion, mang?
You goddamn son of a bitch.
You fucking piece of shit.


Goddamn son of a bitch.
Goddamn piece of shit.

Now it's clear, I can see stallion.
Yes, I too can struggle with the stallion.

[Grislygus]

BOW DOWN BEFORE THE GOD OF DRAWINGS, WEAK AND PITIFUL MORTALS



http://i111.photobucket.com/albums/n157/grislygus/Hand_Study.gif

[Babs]

I AM THREE MEN

p.s. Please read my weekly review in the music column and give your intake. BE LIKE TRU N SHIT.

[DevilWearsPrada]

hey guys look at my shitty drawings made with a ballpoint pen, some idiot out there will probably buy these!

[Guitar Woman]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w--SG2a6xI4&feature=popular

[Pub Lover]

Oh. well that is a thin hope with nothing backing it up. I don't know why you accepted it as you're so disparaging of my unrealistic assertions.

[Pub Lover]

:pagebrak

[Guitar Woman]

I'd take the jetpack too, btw

[elx]

this is bananas :(

sam is running against me :(

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I look like a grey. :(

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Human/IMG_6443.jpg

DAMN YOU AND YOUR FUCKING WARM WEATHER. I SEE THOSE SHORTS.

[Sam]

THOSE ARE CARGO PANTS.

BTW ELX, YOU GOIN DOOOOOWWWWWWWNNNNNN LIKE A SWEET MUFFIN.

[Grislygus]

http://i111.photobucket.com/albums/n157/grislygus/Hand_Study.gif

hey guys look at my shitty drawings made with a ballpoint pen, some idiot out there will probably buy these!

:lol







http://i111.photobucket.com/albums/n157/grislygus/Hand_Study.gif


with a ballpoint pen






http://i111.photobucket.com/albums/n157/grislygus/Hand_Study.gif

a ballpoint pen

[Grislygus]

Jesus Christ, does he have the brain of a fucking goldfish?

[Tadao]

I hope he losses his password again

[Pub Lover]

I want him to post more often. Yes.

[Grislygus]

I actually want him too as well :( He'll pop in whenever no ones around, pause, post, and bail out before anyone can make him cry :( He just wants to be loved, you heartless bastards


On a related note, have you guys SEEN Sam's avatar? That's the best goddamn ballpoint pen drawing I've ever seen in my life

[Pub Lover]

There is a suggestion that they are a rare and hard to get item. Like I am suggesting she retrieve the ark of the covenant or the Maltese falcon. But she might just be refusing to stand up. :x

[Otto]

It is a proven fact that Papermate marker pens cure any form of cancer.

[Terra]

I would love to have a pee date with Tadao. Just to see if ..you know..we might mesh well. What, with his living with his parents and then sharing time with his gf.

No. I promise to not cross the streams.

[Tadao]

I'D FUCK THE LIVING HELL OUT OF YOUR BONEY ASS AND THEN SERVE YOUR KID PANCAKES SHAPED LIKE HELLOKITTY. BUT I'M A ONE LADY KINDA GUY SO YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT TIL I DESTROY YET ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP.

[Grislygus]

I don't really don't fucking think I'm drunk, but once as I got back and started writing and I just spent five minutes trying to fix my incorrect spelling of activites, hating the omnipresent red line smugly sitting under it AND NOW I'M SHARING, FUCK YOU

[Grislygus]

Sam's gonna be mad that hes sharing a pee date. :(

[Grislygus]

this is bananas :(

sam is running against me :(

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE CONTEXT OF THIS IS

[Tadao]

Sam's gonna be mad that hes sharing a pee date. :(

ONE MAN GATHERS WHAT ANOTHER MAN SPILLS

[Fathom Zero]

Anyone know of a good DVD ripper? I'm tired of pirating things I already own. It's dumb and the quality is always shite.

[Tadao]

rip to avi?

[Pub Lover]

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/WebJunk/IMG_6396.jpg
Always a pleasure. :wank
:squiglyhttp://i581.photobucket.com/albums/ss259/wiffles/IMG_6443cop3.gif:squigly

Ain't she just the best? The Zuke needs to tie this one down before some other fella gets in there.

[Tadao]

NO! SHE'S ONE OF MINE! HE NEEDS MY PERMISSION FIRST!

[Sam]

THIS IS HORSE SHIT

[Tadao]

SHE GOT YELLOW FEVER

double pun

[Sam]

NO ONE WANTED TO PISS ON HER BEFORE I DID

NOW EVERYONE WANTS TO PISS ON HER

FUCK YA'LL >:

[Tadao]

:pagebrak

I don't want to pee play with her. I want to fuck her mouth hole and cum all up in her hair. Then make her kid pancakes.

[Fathom Zero]

Hey, Shrubfest. Where you at? Lemme aks you sumthin'.

How you doin', gurl?

[Kitsa]

according to my kid's bathtub, hot water makes you Asian.

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/hotwatermakesyouasian.jpg

[Tadao]

Chinese to be specific

[Kitsa]

well, duh, a japanese baby would be dumping that gel shit in the onsen and having the time of its life

[Otto]

A Chinese baby with a spit-curl.

[Pub Lover]

That is it's ear.

[Tadao]

Jap babies eyes slant the other way

[Grislygus]

Why the hell am I the only person in the United States that thinks Trailer Park Boys is funny as fuck?

[Tadao]

My best friend loves it. He's an idiot though.

[Grislygus]

and why would the bathtub manufacturer think a parent would need to be reminded as to whether or not their baby's bathwater was cold or scalding hot

[Grislygus]

I think its hilarious :( My friends, my coworkers, even my brother thought it was retarded (and that kid still watches cartoons at the age of seventeen, WHILE SOBER)

[Fathom Zero]

My mother loves it. She's an idiot, though.

[Tadao]

Dear Kitsa.

http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/129130952167062621.jpg

[The Leader]

I think its hilarious :( My friends, my coworkers, even my brother thought it was retarded (and that kid still watches cartoons at the age of seventeen, WHILE SOBER)
Bubbles is the best.

Also, what's wrong with cartoons? >:

[WhiteRat]

Why the hell am I the only person in the United States that thinks Trailer Park Boys is funny as fuck?

I've met dozens of people who love the show. When I was deployed we would have 10 or people crowding around my laptop watching the seasons on DVD every night. I have met only one person who I introduced the show to that didn't like it.

[Grislygus]

BUBBALS


Depends on the cartoon

[Grislygus]

Glad to hear I'm not the ONLY ONE, though. I would have bet money that it would have been a big hits with my friends in Coos Bay OR, but it just went flying over their heads (as did my Bill Hicks dvds)

[Kitsa]

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/kitsaasbubbles.jpg

[Terra]

according to my kid's bathtub, hot water makes you Asian.

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/hotwatermakesyouasian.jpg

So that's what happened to my child!! :confused:

What brand is that, Kitsa?

[Tadao]

TITSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[Dixie]

and i'm back. glowbelly did not come see me.
:(
she had a good reason though, but maybe next time.

[Kitsa]

Fisher-price, I think?

Yep, fisher-price.

http://www.walmart.com/ip/Fisher-Price-3-Stage-Pink-Sparkles-Bath-Tub/11315703?sourceid=1500000000000003260330&ci_src=14110944&ci_sku=11315703

[Esuohlim]

Know what every newborn child actually needs?

http://i581.photobucket.com/albums/ss259/wiffles/IMG_6443cop3.gif

[Tadao]

SEXYPARTYTIME

[Colonel Flagg]

NSFW! >:

[Esuohlim]

But safe for kids! :eek

[elx]

woah that thing really does turn your baby azn :( the blonde mother has a blonde baby in one photo and then an azn-esque one in the next!

[Tadao]

SHUT UP AND SHOW ME MORE LEG

[Tadao]

CAUSE I LOVE YOUR LEGS BABY

[Tadao]

YOUR BRAIN IS OK BUT I DON'T WANT TO RUB MY COCK ON YOUR BRAIN

[Tadao]

SO SHOW ME SOME ASS CHEEK AND LEG BABY

[Kitsa]

woah that thing really does turn your baby azn :( the blonde mother has a blonde baby in one photo and then an azn-esque one in the next!


Holy shit, you're right. I hadn't even noticed.

This is all too much to be sheer coincidence. Hot water plus fisher-price tub turns your baby Asian!

[Tadao]

shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[Kitsa]

it's not like you don't have a way to turn babies azn, tadao.

[Tadao]

I got a vasectomy. :tear

[Sam]

TADAO CAN'T EVEN GET AN ERECTION WITHOUT CREAKING LIKE A OLD HOUSE IN A HARD WIND. >:

[Tadao]

I GOT BANNED FROM GBFANS CAUSE I TOLD IT LIKE IT IS!


:CRY

[The Leader]

What's GBFans?

[Tadao]

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/member.php?u=12183

Send him pm's telling him that he is a pussy fagt

[Sam]

IT'S A GHOSTBUSTERS FANSITE THAT TADAO AND I FREQUENT

[Tadao]

http://www.gbfans.com/community/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=19729&start=0

Cause i teased a fat fucker :(

[The Leader]

But he hasn't been on for months. :\

[Tadao]

fgt plkease!

[Tadao]

Rock-et ship (x2)

I'm going on a trip
Far away
I am leaving today (x2)
Rock-et ship (x2)

My bags are packed
I'm ready to go
I'm ready to go-o

Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one
Liftoff

Goin' to Planet X
There's a girl on Planet X
I don't know her
But that's alright
She don't know me either

Rock-et ship (x2)

I'm goin' on a trip
Far away
I am leaving today (x2)
Rock-et ship (x4)

[Fathom Zero]

Google Chrome says that website doesn't exist. Wait, no. Just that topic. :lol

You got blacklisted, Tadao. :lol

[Fathom Zero]

GUYS, I BOUGHT SEVEN BANANAS JUST NOW

BUT- HEADFAKE

I'M PROBABLY NOT EVEN GOING TO EAT THEM ALL

[Tadao]

It's like my thread got ******ed. :(

[Fathom Zero]

Don't worry, Tadao. Them bitches ain't shit, yo.

[DevilWearsPrada]

Why the hell am I the only person in the United States that thinks Trailer Park Boys is funny as fuck?

you're too much of a douchebag to like funny things

[Tadao]

stfu disease

[Fathom Zero]

http://www.mtv.com/videos/the-maxx-episode-1/1611381/playlist.jhtml
SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM

THE MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAXX

[Grislygus]

:lol At least he's trying. The half-retarded little bastard can't even tell the difference a ballpoint pen and A STICK OF CHARCOAL, we needs to protect and support him

[Tadao]

Anyone remember Liquid Television? Anyone? Fgts.

[Sam]

I DO.

OLD FGGT.

[Tadao]

HIGH FGT!

[Tadao]

WOW, WHO DELETED MY gbfans are fgts THREAD? WHAT A CUNT MOVE.

[Fathom Zero]

I'm gonna miss you, Tadao.

[Tadao]

Gay :(

I'll miss you the most FZ

[Sam]

PROBABLY DR BOOGIE DOWN

[Fathom Zero]

Oh, this is melodramatic.

[Babs]

I want to know what it's like to be missed :(

[Pentegarn]

WOW, WHO DELETED MY gbfans are fgts THREAD?

We must get the greatest investigative minds on this, stat!

[Kitsa]

I remember Liquid Television. Wasn't that where Beavis and Butt-head were before they had the show?

And Aeon Flux before it was a shitty movie :(

[Kitsa]

Cincinnati man calls police because hooker shortchanged him in White Castle restroom:

link potentially NSFW

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2010/0406102whitecastle1.html

[Zhukov]

Maybe there's only a certain amount of common sense in the world, and as the population grows, more people miss out.

[Kitsa]

also, it's cincinnati.

[Otto]

I remember liquid television! Most of the animators work for Augenblick Studios (Superjail!, Ugly Americans) now.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

THE MAXX

Brothers Grump?

I have season 1 of THE HEAD on vhs.

[Dixie]

hey sucky mcdickface! i hope you die to death!

[Kitsa]

I have taken out the garbage, lysoled, opened the windows, changed my clothes...WHY DO I STILL SMELL BABY POOP :(

[The Leader]

It might just be your ocd. Sometimes I get to thinking that I smell stuff and it's just me imagining it.

[Kitsa]

maybe :(

I used to have a physician coworker who thought he was about to have a seizure every time he smelled citrus or coffee, since sometimes you phantom-smell those things before seizures.

[RaNkeri]

Must've been a treat during coffee breaks

[MarioRPG]

Should have slipped some coffee grinds into his pocket or something.

[captain516]

Can we talk about Liquid Televison again?

[Kitsa]

the physicians were always doing shit like that to each other.

one guy talked to a colleague before a conference in Denver and told him that Viagra has the side effect of easing altitude sickness. The guy took a bunch of Viagra on the plane and developed priapism.

Someone gave these (http://www.foodservicedirect.com/product.cfm/p/123235/Harry-and-David-Cherry-Chocolate,-4.5-Ounce-.htm) as gifts because they make your shit look bloody. Then he got a kick out of it if he found out the recipient ordered a stool screen or colonoscopy.

Another guy got the super-wide saran wrap and stretched it over the bowl of the toilet, then put down the seat because his target was known for pissing on the seat. It was stretched so tight it was perfectly clear, you couldn't see it if you weren't looking for it. When the guy went in and pissed, the pee bounced off it like a drum and all over his scrubs. It wasn't too harmful because you just grab more off the linen cart, just a little mean.

[Pub Lover]

After a tiff with my bit of skirt, I was feeling charitable and unblocked some people that maybe should've stayed blocked.
[11:53] Axem Cupola: Hiiiiiiii.
[11:53] Pubbles: hullo
[11:54] Axem Cupola: Tell I-mockery that I have lost 60 pounds and that I am down to 205!
[11:54] Pubbles: okay
[11:55] Axem Cupola: And that soon, they'll never be able to call me "sagtits" again.
[11:56] Pubbles: I imagine they will always call you sagtits, my friend. They are not nice people.
[11:56] Axem Cupola: Then that will make them retarded.
[11:57] Axem Cupola: It will prove how pathetic they really are, and how they'll fail at life whever they go, and that they'll always be the ******s, and that outside of their pathetic little forum, they've got no chance against anybody and they'll be buttfucked by big, strong ******s.
[11:57] Pubbles: Um, yes. That is true.
[11:57] Pubbles: You didn't need to prove it.
[11:58] Axem Cupola: That they'll be the little boys with the microscopic penises who even ******s make fun of.
[11:58] Axem Cupola: Oh, but I did. Because now, they're going to be miserable. This is my revenge for their rotton treatment of me.
[11:59] Pubbles: They are already miserible. They are sad, lonely people.
[11:59] Pubbles: If they were good people they would never have treated you so poorly, I'm sure.

[Tadao]

205 pounds of sad. :tear

[Pub Lover]

[13:36] Axem Cupola: "205 pounds of sad". Oh, really? XD
[13:36] Pubbles: Tadao. Poor guy.
[13:36] Axem Cupola: That was the BEST they could do?
[13:37] Pubbles: I think you hurt his feelings.
[13:37] Axem Cupola: lol.
[13:40] Axem Cupola: Seriously, is a person of perfect weight "162 pounds of sad". What a sad attempt at psychological manipulation by attributing a seemingly large weight to what is incorporeal and weightless by it's very nature.
[13:42] Pubbles: Yeah, emotions can't be quantified like that. Silly Tadao didn't even make sense.

..

[Grislygus]

:lol


Who is this person

[Tadao]

The fat mumbling Japanophile know as Clement.

[Terra]

I remember Clement. Not much more, though.

[The Leader]

Tell Clement that I miss him and that he should kill himself, k Pub?

[Grislygus]

He was 265 POUNDS?! JESUS RATFUCKING CHRIST

[Tadao]

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/WebJunk/terrasdemonspawn.gif

[Grislygus]

His face did NOT denote that. Fat face, yes, but not PORKBEAST. Was he a fucking human Weeble or something?

[Pub Lover]

[15:31] Axem Cupola: Tell them "Oh, you silly guys. You think I'm not watching your pathetic denial of your irrepairble failure from a proxy? NEWSFLASH: YOU LOST! You killed the only hope you ever had of feeling suprior to anybody! You're the fatties now. YOU! And that's never going to chance because you are faggots. You all live miserable lives, living in shitty conditions, working on shitty jobs, only to come home to the computer to talk to people who could care less about you, and get made fun of by a guy who lost more weight in one hour than you ever will in your whole life. Get the fuck out, over the hill, white ******s.
[15:31] Pubbles: Absolutely. :)
..

[Tadao]

:lol Those are some seriously retarded thought trees. I bet his parents are related.

[Tadao]

http://jonathanclement.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=122

Ahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahah

[RaNkeri]

COULD THIS MARK THE RETURN OF CLEMENT?


FOR THE 5TH TIME?

[Tadao]

http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b167/jonathanclement/DSC00058.jpg


HE'S GONNA EAT THE BABY!

Holy fuck what an inbred family.

[Grislygus]

What the hell is he bitching about? Did he get banned again or something?

[Grislygus]

Even in that picture, he does not look like he nearly weighed NEARLY 300 POUNDS, did he stash it all in his beefneck?

[Tadao]

:lol

[RaNkeri]

http://jonathanclement.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=429

Same old john

[Grislygus]

I'm actually going to break I-Mockery tradition and CONGRATULATE the poor bastard, Holy Mary Mother of God

[Grislygus]

Now that I've read the links to his forum, I wish that I hadn't already used "Holy Mary Mother of God". It was a just humorous statement, I didn't realize that it was completely fucking appropriate

The forum would be hilarious if it wasn't full of sad, weird people trying to reason with an OBVIOUS CRAZY PERSON

[RaNkeri]

Clement was the best thing to ever happen to I-mockery

[Pub Lover]

Even in that picture, he does not look like he nearly weighed NEARLY 300 POUNDS, did he stash it all in his beefneck?

[16:22] Axem Cupola:
"Even in that picture, he does not look like he nearly weighed NEARLY 300 POUNDS, did he stash it all in his beefneck?"
[16:22] Axem Cupola: That's what Grislygus said.
[16:22] Axem Cupola: Quote it and respond "Heavy bones, maybe?"
..

[Pub Lover]

:pagebrak

[Grislygus]

[16:22] Axem Cupola:
"Even in that picture, he does not look like he nearly weighed NEARLY 300 POUNDS, did he stash it all in his beefneck?"
[16:22] Axem Cupola: That's what Grislygus said.
[16:22] Axem Cupola: Quote it and respond "Heavy bones, maybe?

So he lost sixty pounds of bone marrow?

[Wiffles]

before and after pix plz~

[Pub Lover]

Hullo Wiffles, How are you? :love
before and after pix plz~

[17:01] Axem Cupola: Quote "before and after pix plz~" And say "I'll post "After" pics later, cause I'm not done, yet! I want to shed at least 20 more pounds! Then I'll be in the "normal" weight range with a BMI of <25.00 Before pics... I wish to fuck I had taken some! :-(

[Tadao]

Normal weight for a mid western inbred fgt

[kahljorn]

[16:22] Axem Cupola: Quote it and respond "Heavy bones, maybe?"

:O his bones are made of gold

[Zhukov]

Hello Wiffles, how are you? Do anything interesting lately? :)


I know a guy with cerebral palsy, his right arm and leg are very horribly disfigured, and he has trouble speaking. He was so bummed that he was a virgin that he was going to pay for a prostitute and get it over and done with, but I managed to help him realise that virginity isn't as important/bad as people make it out to be, and that finding someone genuine rather than paying someone to force themselves to have sex with you is a much better alternative, and one that you would at least not look back on with regret. Pub, tell Jonathan Clements that if my disfigured acquaintance can deal with using his personality to have sex, then his fat body and mental-ness can do the same. :)

[Wiffles]

I havent done anything interesting in a while, just opened up my 5 yr old laptop and cleaned all the dust. runs cooler and faster now. ^.^

[executioneer]

finding someone genuine rather than paying someone to force themselves to have sex with you is a much better alternative
oh yeah, that works real great >: >: :(

[elx]

jonathan clement is eucky :( he will never be unblocked &you guys are crazy

[Kitsa]

reading the past few pages of this thread is like when one of those basic cable channels plays Carrie over and over and over again.

[Pub Lover]

[02:30] Axem Cupola: Tell I-mockery "BEEF JERKY JERK OFF!!!"

..

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I bet he works at a jerk office too.

[Zhukov]

jonathan clement is eucky :( he will never be unblocked &you guys are crazy

Unblocked? You mean as in on MSN or something? Why would you add him in the first place?

[Dimnos]

Thats what I was just wondering. Why are any of you talking to him in any form? :\

[The Leader]

Because he's funny.

[RaNkeri]

Thats what I was just wondering. Why are any of you talking to him in any form? :\

Plenty of his old gems are stored in thread backups section

[Esuohlim]

Plenty of his old gems are stored in thread backups section

:miamivicefuckyeah

[Zhukov]

:miamivicefuckyeah

Banned.

[elx]

he started messaging me and i didn't know who he was :(

as for them i have no idea why they'd be voluntarily be talking to him, that's why i called them crazy!

[Dimnos]

If by funny you mean "in the head" then sure. :\

[Zhukov]

I don't think I understand instant messaging these days. I was under the impression that someone had to be added to your 'network' or something like that before you could talk to them.

[Pub Lover]

Thats what I was just wondering. Why are any of you talking to him in any form? :\

I am willing to talk to anyone that wants to talk to me. I unblock everyone eventually.

[Pub Lover]

I don't think I understand instant messaging these days. I was under the impression that someone had to be added to your 'network' or something like that before you could talk to them.

It can be set so anyone can contact you. If you are lonely like me.

[Pub Lover]

[QUOTE=elx;680728as for them i have no idea why they'd be voluntarily be talking to him, that's why i called them crazy![/QUOTE]

I feel sorry for him. He is so bitter over something he brings on himself. the people that originally made him feel bad don't even post here any more.