I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

[Esuohlim]

i wish i could disable the ability to give people positive rep

I think people with negative rep should also have their postcount decreased by 1 for each post

[Babs]

I can only hope to improve.

[kahljorn]

SOMEBODY GIVE ME SOME ZUGS OR REPUTATION PICKLES OR WHATEVER THEY ARE

[elx]

what asshole keeps messing with shit

[kahljorn]

ALL ASSHOLES KEEP MESSING WITH SHIT

[elx]

:lol



but really. nobody likes change!

[Esuohlim]

I WANT TO GIVE KAHL ALL MY PICKLES, BUT APPARENTLY I HAVE TO WAIT LIKE 10 YEARS BEFORE I'M ABLE TO GIVE PICKLES TO THE SAME PERSON AGAIN?

THIS PICKLE SYSTEM IS CHUCKLEWORTHY AT BEST

[Chojin]

you have to vote on 5 other people before you can rep the same person again

and you have 10 votes per day

i am open to revising this policy

[Chojin]

also i really do lol every time i read the word 'chuckleworthy'

[Tadao]

:NIPPLES

I'd prefer it if I could see my rep if I just click on my profile, the same way that my profile shows me my infractions.

[Otto]

I think my dog just ate one of my Celexa and or Dexedrine. He's just sitting on his pillow bobbing his head around and growling at nothing.

I kind of want to mess with him with my Peewee Herman ventriloquist dummy.

[Chojin]

our newest emoticon is

:chuckleworthy

[Tadao]

also i really do lol every time i read the word 'chuckleworthy'

Can you see my negstive feedback?

[Chojin]

:NIPPLES

I'd prefer it if I could see my rep if I just click on my profile, the same way that my profile shows me my infractions.

yeah i agree, i'd also like it if everyone could see everyones' rep in the profile view

[Fathom Zero]

I applaud these decisions.

ALL OF THESE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE FOR US, CHOJIN. You who art so selfless, what can we do for you?

[Chojin]

Can you see my negstive feedback?

yes but i have to go into the admin panel and type your name in. it's gay

I applaud these decisions.

ALL OF THESE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE FOR US, CHOJIN. You who art so selfless, what can we do for you?

this man knows how to collect rep

[Tadao]

yes but i have to go into the admin panel and type your name in. it's gay

I mean the bad rep I left you ;)

[Otto]

Okay I'm seriously worried here: Dog just let out a freak-out scream that would put Hunter Thompson to shame.

[Fathom Zero]

24 vet. :\

[Grislygus]

THE POST RANKINGS HAVE OPENED THE GATES INTO THE WORLD AND I DECLARE MYSELF HIGH PRIEST OF THE ESOTERIC ORDER OF THE BEARDED ONE

OUR GOD SLEEPS IN THE ANCIENT CITY OF R'LYEH AND OCCASIONALLY WAKES TO PLAY THE OREGON TRAIL AND PUT SHAVING CREAM IN THE EARS OF CTHULHU. PH'NGLUI MGLW'NAFH WILLIE R'LYEH WGAH'NAGI FHTAGN! THE CHOSEN SHALL BE BLESSED IN THE NAME OF OUR GOD, WHICH IS SUPERIOR TO ALL

[Fathom Zero]

24 vet. :\

I realize that makes even less sense when I don't add 'hour'.

[Otto]

Okay, I get it. I kind of thought you meant 24 hour vet it your original post. That's not an option since I live in the middle of fucking nowhere, but the dog should be fine. It was a really low dose of dexedrine and he's managed to get into my pill box before.

[Fathom Zero]

Dogs are more resilient than people give them credit for.

Unless they eat chocolate. Then you're an asshole.

[Esuohlim]

:nipples

[Esuohlim]

Okay, I get it. I kind of thought you meant 24 hour vet it your original post. That's not an option since I live in the middle of fucking nowhere, but the dog should be fine. It was a really low dose of dexedrine and he's managed to get into my pill box before.

http://i.imgur.com/UG5Tg.gif

[Tadao]

That actually makes me laugh.

[Otto]

The emoticon is funny, but I think animated is just too much.

[Zomboid]

What do you know? Not how to take care of your poor dog, obviously.

[Otto]

You don't know how fucking stupid my dog is. I mean he's really dumb, like low functioning autism dumb. I think that the anesthesia from his neutering might have brain damaged him.

[Pub Lover]

http://i.imgur.com/UG5Tg.gif

I was going to ask for this to be made but I had run out of Zugs.

[executioneer]

what if there was one for SUPER chuckleworthy that flipped twice as fast and had "SUPER" in flashy red/white/black letters

[Otto]

seizure inducingly chuckleworthy

[Chojin]

flippin' chuckleworthy

[kahljorn]

I WANT TO GIVE KAHL ALL MY PICKLES, BUT APPARENTLY I HAVE TO WAIT LIKE 10 YEARS BEFORE I'M ABLE TO GIVE PICKLES TO THE SAME PERSON AGAIN?

POOR BOY SANDWICHES FOR EVERYBODY

[Chojin]

someone needs to make the Page Zak

[kahljorn]

these girls were in one of those conference/study rooms talking about breat implants or some shit and one of them was saying how hers got messed up (not ruined just i dunno messed up a bit somehow "but they still look fine") from driving around / fucking and when they walked out of the room they looked at me cause i was sitting at a table right next to there and were all, "I WONDER IF HE HEARD US" and i looked at them and was all, "YEP" and went back to sleep

:masterofflirting

[Zhukov]

Smooth like glass Kahl. Nice.

These two filthy slappers sat on the bus behind me today, and were talking about getting tattoos during the school holidays. One of them wanted "a half car, half horse thing". I did an audible TSK and thought about how superior I was. I was on my way to collect my dole.

[Zomboid]

I just gave you bros some rep for those posts. Keep up the good work.
:chuckleworthy

[Chojin]

oh grrrreat i found a way to turn on rep for admins too

pram maven is online btw

i wonder how he feels about his mockerzugs.

[Tadao]

He just pmed me something about doing meth. I guess it was meant to upset me or something. I've never met anyone as slow in the head as this fool.

[Tadao]

So, I have the IPad for the next 2 weeks. At this point, I'd much rather have the laptop.

[Otto]

Doesn't Pram also think that you don't have legs for some reason?

I'm typing this from an ipod touch.

[Tadao]

He thinks a lot of wrong things because he never actually pays attention.

[Fathom Zero]

sorry aboutm you legs

[Tadao]

I need to set up a Tadao wheelchair donation website.

[Chojin]

just ask the actors' guild to set it up for you

[Fathom Zero]

You should try and snag a Free White Cane, too. (http://www.nfb.org/nfb/free_cane_program.asp)

[Tadao]

I've thought about turning my dog into a service dog, but appearently they have to be well behaved to pass. Kitsa, did yours ever pass?

[Otto]

use donations to buy child porn, mail child porn to pram maven in a big box marked HERE IS THE CHILD PORN YOU ORDERED, DON CARLSON.

[Tadao]

:pagebrak

[Pub Lover]

...what would you do if you wanted to be obnoxious when someone wants to take a serious picture of you?
Drop my trousers.

[Esuohlim]

Hand in the pants

[Pram Maven]

<i>use donations to buy child porn, mail child porn to pram maven in a big box marked HERE IS THE CHILD PORN YOU ORDERED, DON CARLSON</i>

Oh, you mean

[Otto]

I'M NOT THE DEGENERATED PREVERT THAT ORDERS CHILD PORNOGRAPHY, DON.

[Pram Maven]

Me neither. But, you know, I could just as easily spread lies about you, so stop being a punk.

[Tadao]

Yeah, you're real successful at that sort of thing. :lol

[Pram Maven]

Haven't tried. You annoy me, but haven't earned my genuine hatred. Mostly, I think you're an immature boob who likes typing ":nipples" a lot. Probably wishing you could see yours behind your neck fat.

[Pram Maven]

*pinches Tadao's neck fat* it's so CUTE! What's it's name?

[Tadao]

Again, it's amazing how much you don't know.

[Pram Maven]

I know you need mental help, seem to exist only to breathe out bad air, and have a weird crush on me.

[Tadao]

Everyones seen you crybaby pms. We share them every time you send them to one of us. :lol

[Tadao]

Tadao,

Would you please unlink that thread from your sig? I'm beggin' ya. It's showing up in my animation stuff now.

If there's any subject you want to learn about, or technical stuff related to your interests, or a song, or even a rare show clip you're looking for, I could probably find the information if you wanted me to trade that for my reputation. That's all I want, and I'm willing to improve your life in some way to get it back. If there's any indirect way I can contribute to the board, I'll do that too.

:lol

[Tadao]

You're nothing.

[Pram Maven]

Everyone's seen this thread (http://www.zug.com/live/68000/Pram-Support-Group.html) in which I embarrassed you in front of a whole messageboard before you had any power here.

[Otto]

Me neither. But, you know, I could just as easily spread lies about you, so stop being a punk.

MAKE ME STOP, YOU PERVERTED GNOME! OR ARE YOU TOO BUSY TOUCHING YOURSELF TO IMAGES OF SHIRTLESS LITTLE BOYS????

[Pram Maven]

You're less than nothing...You're so ignoble, you're not even on Google.

[Tadao]

He STILL thinks I'm Neophyte :lol You still don't have a clue. :lol Someone needs to track down Neophyte and show him all this. I'm sure he'd enjoy it.

[Otto]

Everyone's seen this thread (http://www.zug.com/live/68000/Pram-Support-Group.html) in which I embarrassed you in front of a whole messageboard before you had any power here.

All I see is people making fun of you, just like on this board.

[Otto]

You're less than nothing...You're so ignoble, you're not even on Google.

BETTER TO NOT BE ON GOOGLE, THAN TO BE ON GOOGLE AS AN E-CRYBABY THAT LET A DYING COMEDY MESSAGEBOARD RUIN HIS LIFE.

[Pram Maven]

Outta my way, Otto (Otto my way, Outta?)

How would I make you stop... Hmmmm. Oh, I know. I won't react to anything you say. I like that one.

Anyways, this is the chat thread, I don't want to disrupt whatever conversation you were having.

[Otto]

Outta my way, Otto (Otto my way, Outta?)

How would I make you stop... Hmmmm. Oh, I know. I won't react to anything you say. I like that one.

Anyways, this is the chat thread, I don't want to disrupt whatever conversation you were having.

I'M SORRY I COULDN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF YOU MASTURBATING TO THE LITTLE RASCALS AND CRYING INTO A PILLOW.

[Pram Maven]

Otto- I-mockery is dying?! What? I hope not.

[Pram Maven]

I-mockery is what I refer to when I talk about fat people who gang up on skinny guys to get out their pudge aggression. It's the south half of my moral compass. I-mockery can't die... I'll have nothing to remind me of the good in life.

[Tadao]

I love the fact that he plain ignores the part where he finally figures out Neophyte hasn't been following him and no one cares that much about him. He actually thought he as important for a while. :lol

[Pram Maven]

Proof Tadao is Neophyte (http://forums.spondylitis.org/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=74912&fpart=1)

Also, Tadao, you've come at me personally since I humiliated you in 2006. Your style of writing is the same as Neophyte's. You even created a thread about Asian tattoos and...feh.

[Tadao]

How does that prove I am Neophyte? I have to hear this one. :lol

[Tadao]

:nipples

[Otto]

Something tells me that Don is heavily immersed in the world of gangstalking victims :lol

[Pram Maven]

One last thing (http://www.google.com/search?q=%22Don+Carlson+%28Pram+Maven%29+is+a+home less+criminal%22&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=y7S&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&channel=np&prmd=ivnso&ei=4zQCTrrxMu_ViAK-jImnCA&start=0&sa=N&filter=0&biw=1680&bih=940), Tadao. If you're not following me, then why are you linking to that thread in every post you make and unfairly influencing Google's Page Rank (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=Eon&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&channel=np&q=Don+Carlson+animator&aq=f&aqi=g-v1&aql=&oq=) for my name?

[Zhukov]

Being unemployed means the worst stress I have at the moment is that Alley McBeal and Sabrina the Teenage Witch are both on TV at the same time, and I have to keep switching between the two to follow both stories.

Pram, I love that you came back. Just for everyone to hate you again.

[Tadao]

Oh fuck it. He's never gonna figure out that all I did was google him, find him complaining on Zug about Neophyte posting his name, then claim to be him to further spook the hell out of him. He needs me to be some guy who has been chasing him for 6 years. :lol You have got to be the biggest loser ever to grace this board.

[Tadao]

One last thing (http://www.google.com/search?q=%22Don+Carlson+%28Pram+Maven%29+is+a+home less+criminal%22&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=y7S&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&channel=np&prmd=ivnso&ei=4zQCTrrxMu_ViAK-jImnCA&start=0&sa=N&filter=0&biw=1680&bih=940), Tadao. If you're not following me, then why are you linking to that thread in every post you make and unfairly influencing Google's Page Rank (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=Eon&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&channel=np&q=Don+Carlson+animator&aq=f&aqi=g-v1&aql=&oq=) for my name?

I think your potential employers need to know how sue happy you are. ;)

[Zhukov]

I'll be surprised if anyone actually checks your links to other boards/proof/whatever, Pram. I don't give a shit if Tadao is being embarrassed by you (SCOFF) on other boards; you're an embarrassment here.

[Pram Maven]

I've been watching 1,000 ways to die. Pretty cool how the victims didn't die from the obvious, but something you wouldn't expect. CSI is my favorite show at the moment. Gotta watch something while Dexter is between seasons.

[Esuohlim]

One last thing (http://www.google.com/search?q=%22Don+Carlson+%28Pram+Maven%29+is+a+home less+criminal%22&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=y7S&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&channel=np&prmd=ivnso&ei=4zQCTrrxMu_ViAK-jImnCA&start=0&sa=N&filter=0&biw=1680&bih=940), Tadao. If you're not following me, then why are you linking to that thread in every post you make and unfairly influencing Google's Page Rank (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=Eon&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&channel=np&q=Don+Carlson+animator&aq=f&aqi=g-v1&aql=&oq=) for my name?

For the ninth fucking time, there isn't a link to any I-Mock thread on the first page of results

Unless of course your potential employers are indeed searching for "Don Carlson is a homeless criminal" on google

[Tadao]

NO GUYS, HE CLEARLY HAS THIS ALL FIGURED OUT

[Pram Maven]

There is on my computer... Weird. Maybe I just need to clear my cache.

[Pram Maven]

Ehhh, whatever. So... I was thinking about the mascot for I-mockery. It would look REALLY COOL in clay. Want to see it?

[Zhukov]

I want to see you hit by a car, but that's about it.

[Pub Lover]

Anyways, this is the chat thread, I don't want to disrupt whatever conversation you were having.
That isn't how it works. You have it backwards. I will now post an emoticon a thousand times.

[Pram Maven]

I think your potential employers need to know how sue happy you are. ;)

Nah, I don't have any money to sue.

But I do think they need to know that you're orchestrating all of this inaccurate information about me. For now, they just think you're a psycho stalker. So, they know about you, and don't expect anything you say about me to be true.

[Tadao]

Yeah, that's why you pm us to beg us to stop. :lol

[Zhukov]

Yes, potential employers are going to browse i-mockery for links to other message boards where you DESTROY someone called Neophyte who you say is Tadao from i-mockery. They will then see that his claims that you are homeless are unfounded.

Potential employers are only aware that Tadao is a stalker at this point, so keep posting here to clear your reputation. This makes sense.

[Pub Lover]

Being unemployed means the worst stress I have at the moment is that Alley McBeal and Sabrina the Teenage Witch are both on TV at the same time, and I have to keep switching between the two to follow both stories.
Which episodes are on? Are you merging the two into a single narrative?

[Zhukov]

Oh, they were on hours ago. On Ally Mcbeal the guy with bleached hair died for real and there was singing, and on Sabrina she was wearing a mini skirt and used magic or something.

Like I said; problems.

[Fathom Zero]

I keep looking for a thread called "Don Carlson is a homeless vagrant" but it doesn't exist. :(

[Pram Maven]

Yeah, that's why you pm us to beg us to stop. :lol

Actually, I don't care anymore. I've accepted it. There's going to be ugly shit about me on the internet no matter what. There will also be positive shit. Same as there's always been.

[Ex Leper]

When will there be an Encyclopedia Dramatic page for him?

[Pram Maven]

...unlike YOU, Tadao, whom, when Googled, one can only find negative shit. Because you're a dick everywhere you post. Even on the Spondylitis forums. Shock this, sex that. Is there any SUBSTANCE to you?

[Babs]

Fuck off loser

[Pram Maven]

Anyway, what's this I hear about I-mockery's forum dying? Sure, i-mockery and I might not be on cuddle-fucking terms, but I wouldn't wish death on it.

[Babs]

Stop googling your name as well, you self centered fuck.

[Babs]

Because things like you come in here and people see your stupid ass infamous name and decide to avoid it as much as possible. Honestly, because of you, I don't come here anymore.

[Pram Maven]

That's like saying "because of the rising cost of ingredients, CAKES DON'T TASTE GOOD ANYMORE". You can't blame the cost of me being here on the entire site dying. If you need something to point the finger at, how about... oh, I don't know, I-mockery slowly getting a bad rap for going too far with abusing its users? THAT'S what makes them leave, fucky.

[Grislygus]

Oh shit, Tadao's going to like Pram Maven now :eek:eek:eek

[Pram Maven]

...and it surely keeps new posters from even joining. Shit. The fact that you can read everything on the forums before signing up is very telling. A lot of forums make you join before you can see a single post. Maybe that would help I-mockery's case.

[Pram Maven]

*sigh* this is pointless.

[Grislygus]

Yeah, 'cause we'd LOVE to be exactly like the Dead Horse Interchange

[Kitsa]

I've thought about turning my dog into a service dog, but appearently they have to be well behaved to pass. Kitsa, did yours ever pass?

I had to wade a river of shit to find this post...

I held off on the certification because I got pregnant and was on bedrest. She's passed her basic obedience training she has to have before the certification, but not the certification training.

Waiting for her to calm down a little, really. She's still young and hyper.

[Kitsa]

also, not sure how it is in California, but in my state once they're certified you get a special lifetime dog license and don't have to pay every year anymore, so there's that.

[Tadao]

I'd pay just so that I can take her into restaurants and Farmers Markets :lol

[Tadao]

Also I've have sex with women on both forums :eek

[Tadao]

Oh man, no one rated Mock yet, so I red pickled him. HAH!

[Tadao]

Oh shit, I forgot to tell you guys because I was pretending to be Tomatstu or whatever. An ex lives in NY and has some photos in a real gallery there. I forget which one but FZ's art thing just reminded me. I hope she didn't make a pee jesus. :(

[Tadao]

FUCK, I'M OUT OF JUSTICE. HOW CAN I PROTECT THE CITY?

[Guitar Woman]

Fuck, I had one of those relapse nightmares

I thought that was a recovering alcoholic thing

[kahljorn]

I-mockery is what I refer to when I talk about fat people who gang up on skinny guys to get out their pudge aggression.Pram maven is what i refer to when I'm talking about the skinny dudes too stupid to run away from fat people with pudge aggression

THEYRE FAT YOU IDIOT THEY CANT CATCH YOU

also i like how he already has negative red pickles

[Ex Leper]

There should a number of negative pickles that equals an automatic banning.

[Chojin]

i hope you guys are repping pram according to his tantrums.

...and it surely keeps new posters from even joining. Shit. The fact that you can read everything on the forums before signing up is very telling. A lot of forums make you join before you can see a single post. Maybe that would help I-mockery's case.

:chuckleworthy

[Chojin]

i wonder what brawl-hall is up to these days

[Shyandquietguy]

Pram Maven, YOU are what's wrong with this fucking world. You are the intolerant, closed minded shit stains that can't seem to come to a lick of sense before you open your mouth.

Fuck you. Fuck you for not only giving people with mental illnesses bad names but for proving that THEY DESERVE TO BE HOMELESS>

[Zhukov]

I-mockery is dying :\


It's dying because it abuses its powers and the common people aren't happy.



Pram Maven; what world do you live on, and can you return to it?

[captain516]

red pickles= sausages ?

[Otto]

Pram Maven; what world do you live on, and can you return to it?

I don't want to imagine a planet where every being on it is a homeless sperglord that takes the internet seriously.

[Kitsa]

red pickles= sausages ?

Strange that the first thing I thought of was severed penises.

Maybe I need therapy :\

[captain516]

:lol
also what do the numbers of pickles mean

[Esuohlim]

If you get enough for a full jar you win a prize!

[Otto]

I hope it's a personal Pram Maven stalking safari!

[Tadao]

:NIPPLES

[dextire]

Dammit, Tadao! The nipples thing wasn't funny the first time and it's... getting funnier every time you do it for some stupid reason. :lol

[Fathom Zero]

snipples

t_htoSaQFf4

[Chojin]

:lol
also what do the numbers of pickles mean

http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69706899

[Zhukov]

I keep getting told that before I can rate someone again I have to spread the reputation love around. Any idea how many times I have to rate someone else before I can get back to slagging off the same people I have little or no real problem with, but still want to see die?

[Chojin]

you get 10 votes per 24 hours, and have to vote on 5 people before you can vote on the same person...i'm going to remove that restriction for now, though.

[Zhukov]

Brilliant.

[Otto]

Ugh, I got followed around town for three hours today by some weird guy that kept wanting to tell me about "the reptillian conspiracy."

[Chojin]

you should have started hissing angrily at him

[Zhukov]

Eh, that sounds vaguely interesting. Today I just keep getting hassled by the bank to sign up for life insurance, next step they take will be to hit me with a truck to show me how close I am to death.

[Otto]

Eh, that sounds vaguely interesting. Today I just keep getting hassled by the bank to sign up for life insurance, next step they take will be to hit me with a truck to show me how close I am to death.

That reminds me of when one of my friends that I used to live with signed up for a local TEA party newsletter at the state fair to piss me off. I haven't lived with him for a while, but he still can't get them to stop sending him e-mails, phone calls, invitations to their klavern, and letters begging for donations.

[dextire]

"the reptillian conspiracy."
It all makes sense now!

http://i678.photobucket.com/albums/vv150/dextire/repcon.jpg

[Otto]

I got a serious Daniel Johnston vibe from the guy, he even had the creepy childlike voice and lisp. Only I think instead of recording Casio songs on cassettes he just stalks random people and tries to warn them that politicians are actually lizard-people.

[Zhukov]

I said to myself "Why would you think that? He sounds crazy..."

Which is pretty fucking obvious.

[executioneer]

WHY DO I HAVE A GREEN PICKLE





HOW DARE YOU ALL
whoops :lol

[kahljorn]

i like that pram maven has two accounts cause i can give him tons of red pickles

[Esuohlim]

I'm going to go red pickle a whole bunch of old Lenor posts right now

[Esuohlim]

Shit, after about 7 I used up my limit for the day :lol

There's always tomorrow!

[Pram Maven]

When you think about it, all my pickles indicate that I have joined the Dim Side. You will call me Sperg Vader. Now I'm off to build my Death Asterisk.

[HickMan]

So thanks to Chojin, I got my old account back! And I forgot how awesome I-Bapery was. Thanks, Chojin!

BTW


I'M BACK FAGITS

[HickMan]

I have an unread message from Jixby Phillips :eek

[Zhukov]

Did Rudy end up winning?

[kahljorn]

he had a heart attack right before he made the touch down

apparently he had a congenital heart problem which is what made him so small

[Tadao]

http://kritikallyfe.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/nips1.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

Sometimes, cleaning your desktop feels like you've been cleaning the house.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

lol, yeah. I have a folder on my desktop just called DESKTOP STUFF though. I feel like I should have just named it THE ATTIC.

[Shyandquietguy]

You mean THAT desktop! :lol

[Fathom Zero]

I have eleven thousand mp3s, game shortcuts, government pdfs, short stories, and Disney movies on it. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IS IN THESE WORD FILES. :(

[Fathom Zero]

I refuse to have a desk. I hate desks. The school supplied one I had when I stayed there served only to bring my minifridge up an additional four feet.

[LordSappington]

My problems with desks is I can never find any with the right amount and placement of drawers, nooks, and desk space to hold all my shit I somehow accumulate.
Seriously, I have cds, gloves, knives, bullet casings, flashlights, movies, and hardware on and in my desk. Where the hell do I even get this shit?

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

You need an armoire LS.

Final Fantasy XI tought me how to organize my stuff way better than life lessons ever had.

[Otto]

My desk looks like it's from the house of a methamphetamine addict. It's full of random trinkets that I've picked up from flea-markets, I'm pretty sure every container on it has been used as an ash-tray at least once, there's bottles of ink and paint, soup cans full of drawing pens that I haven't touched in months, and empty cigarette packs and tobacco pouches galore!

I need help.

[Kitsa]

I've always been obsessively neat, and that's slowly going to hell. I have no choice :(

[Otto]

The funny thing is that I used to keep my desk relatively clean, save for the trinkets and pens, but I've been having insomnia problems (I somehow manage to lose track of the time and fall asleep around three in the morning) and everything else has gone straight to hell.

[Ex Leper]

I have a bad habit of deleting everything when it gets too cluttered.

[dextire]

I keep my desktop clean and organized, but my actual desk is a complete mess.
So I can find my Halloween clip-art from 1995 in seconds, and it can take an hour to find my car keys. I've got my priorities straight. :posh

[Fathom Zero]

http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/1675/tumblrln08hyqxsh1qffuuf.jpg

[Otto]

I found this one at a goodwill for 25 cents! YOUR LOSS GOODWILL!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/Arnoldreap/gaydogs.jpg

[Pub Lover]

So how many of you are willing to get into a TF2 penisfight now that it is free for my hoboass to play?

[Otto]

I'd love to join in, but I'm on a cheap laptop and my desktop is six years old.

[Shyandquietguy]

Sure, I'm up. CaptainFlameGore

[Shyandquietguy]

I am now curious.

How many people on here would tell me "Good for you, doing it is bad for your health" if I said I have never done any non-prescribed drugs in my life.

[executioneer]

man prescribed drugs are bad for you too

just don't overdo whatever it is you do

[Otto]

People say that I'm "perma-stoned," but unless I'm under a lot of real or perceived stress I usually manage to avoid using too much of whatever substance I'm on.

I'd go with what Willie says! Everything in moderation!

[Esuohlim]

Everything in moderation!

Except for huuuuuuugs

[Zhukov]

I am now curious.

How many people on here would tell me "Good for you, doing it is bad for your health" if I said I have never done any non-prescribed drugs in my life.

I would. Here, have some complimentary mockerzugs to wash down with the appraisal.

[Pub Lover]

:pagebrak

[HickMan]

thanks for the page brak

[Pub Lover]

Thank you for keeping us safe in our beds.

[HickMan]

I'll let you know when it's safe to go outside and play. But for now, there's evil afoot.

J/K not really. Not even a hundred John Matrix's could fix this country.

[Tadao]

Thanks Dad!

[Pub Lover]

A few years ago I suggested I wanted Sarah Palin to be US President and Yulia Tymoshenko to be Ukrainian/Russian President. I wanted a sexy cold war. In hindsight that shit would've been mental.

Tymoshenko on trial in Kiev for abuse of power. (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-13899740)

[Kitsa]

I've always loved her Empire Strikes Back hairdo, though.

[executioneer]

aw peter falk died boo

[Pub Lover]

One last thing, Mr Falk? :(

[Pram Maven]

Hey Pub, how's it goin?

[kahljorn]

Pub Lover when did you change your name to Pram Lover

did he show you his cock yet

[Kitsa]

I take exception to the i-bapery skin referring to me as Brother Kitsa.

:(

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Drunk mode are go!

[Otto]

I just looked down at my floor and realized that it's caked with Taco Bell chili-cheese burrito wrappers. My life clearly went wrong at some point.

[Ex Leper]

Has anyone else here noticed that every once in a while there are a ton of banned spam-bots listed as being online? I was wondering how that works.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I just looked down at my floor and realized that it's caked with Taco Bell chili-cheese burrito wrappers. My life clearly went wrong at some point.

Just not yet.

[Esuohlim]

Has anyone else here noticed that every once in a while there are a ton of banned spam-bots listed as being online? I was wondering how that works.

I usually notice this in the middle of the night, yeah. It's like an extra fuck-you to all of us

[LordSappington]

There's some crappy bug going around Austin right now that I caught. The weird thing is that in addition to making me stuffy, achy, and exhausted, it's also given me an insatiable hunger. To the point that I've eaten three sandwiches, half a jumbo bag of curly cheetos, half a can of salt and vinegar pringles, half a gallon of tea, and about half a pound of blueberries.
What in the hell is this bug?

[Esuohlim]

Congrats, you probably caught puberty. Your mom and I are dang proud

[Zhukov]

That's what you think is eating a lot of food? That's just snacking.

[kahljorn]

youve caught worms

[Pub Lover]

Sappy, try eating brains. It will sate your hunger. That or blood.

[Pub Lover]

Pub Lover when did you change your name to Pram Lover

did he show you his cock yet

Double nope. >:

[Tadao]

:eek

[Tadao]

:conspiracy

[Tadao]

:pagebrak

[Chojin]

i'm putting a user spread of 2 on repping because some people are just lazoring in on others and redding them for every post in a thread

and by 'some people' i mean 'tadao', and by 'others' i mean 'babs'

[Fathom Zero]

lol

[RaNkeri]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v202/RaNkeri/Viski2.png

:rock

[Fathom Zero]

RANKERI

<3 u, bby

[Kitsa]

I went to the zoo today and long story short i fucking hate everyone

[Shyandquietguy]

Someone threw their feces at the monkeys, didn't they?

[Otto]

South Carolina's Riverbanks Zoo is actually pretty neat.. I mean it would be neat if this state wasn't full of dumb trash. All of the animals look miserable (I keep expecting to go to the gorilla exhibit and see one of the silverbacks smoking to deal with the depression and the stress), there are morbidly obese children vomiting and shitting on everything, I saw some dumb fuck in a Dale Earnhardt baseball cap laughing and flicking cigarettes at the monkeys, and I'm pretty sure the zoo's only polar bear killed itself to get away (it died almost six years ago and its enclosure is still empty and full of trash).

[Zhukov]

The Hobart zoo was closed down in the 1930s. All the animals were shot - including the last surviving Tasmanian tiger - except for the chimpanzees, because they were considered a rarity.

The chimps where moved up north to Launceston, to become that city's main tourist attraction. Several decades later when the entire colony had to be exterminated because they were spreading AIDS.

The entrance to the Hobart zoo didn't muck about, and depicted the full horrors of zoo life on it's iron bars. Just look at the sad, caged animals. (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/de/Beaumaris_Zoo_site.jpg)

[Otto]

Even for a place that's been abandoned since the thrities that is one piss poor looking zoo entrance.

[Pub Lover]

That is what the high class places look like in New Zealand.

[Evil Robot II]

the CIA created the "like" button to track you. The CIA funded "miss" magazine.

[Fathom Zero]

Barkmarket is awesome.

[Esuohlim]

i'm putting a user spread of 2 on repping because some people are just lazoring in on others and redding them for every post in a thread

and by 'some people' i mean 'tadao', and by 'others' i mean 'babs'

I AM GETTING HOUNDED BY ZHUKOV BECAUSE HE IS A JEALOUS CUNT ABOUT PICKLES

[Grislygus]

RANKERI GOD BLESS YOUR TASTE YOU LOVABLE FINNLISH BASTARD

[Esuohlim]

If this were 2006 Rankeri would have 10 red pickles by now.

Oh how the times have changed

[Kitsa]

Mainly my problem with the zoo was the teeming mass of beerbellied idiots and the black cloud of selfishness, ignorance and noise that emanated from it.

Here are a few bullet points.

- There was some enormous group there. They all had burgundy t-shirts on with Confederate flags and music notes on the back. I don't even understand what that was supposed to mean. Klan Khoir? How many Confederate songs could there be? Anyway, they were everywhere, shouting to each other and basically obnoxious-ing up the place.

- If I had a nickel for every idiot who ran just far enough ahead of their group to read the exhibit sign first, then announce to the rest "THIS HERE IS A SUN BEAR", or something like that like they knew what the hell they were talking about, I could buy a really nice club to beat the fuck out of all of them with.

-The obesely-disabled in rented scooters, ramming people.

-People who stand at displays and announce to everyone else, "See 'at-air? I shot one-a 'im."

-People who try to provoke sleeping animals to action by hooting and throwing things. I keep hoping they'll get mauled and it never happens.

-The guy who was wheeling a large, beat-up rolling cooler that was so loaded with soda bottles that it broke off the handle and fell on its side, with bottles and ice going *sploosh* all over the path. There had to be three or four 12-packs of soda bottles in that cooler, for his small family's exclusive use. Why the hell would you need that much soda for a visit to the zoo? I mean, really, do you have to fill a suitcase-sized cooler?

-Parents who don't make their kids stay near them, leaving the kids to dart around wildly from display to display, running into people and generally raising hell.

-Aforementioned kids, who run from display to display just randomly trying out all of the interactive stuff and breaking it before you get there.

-the fucking idiots who can't understand basic instructions on a carousel, like one person per horse. The carousel operator had to stop people several times who stuck small infants on horses and then climbed up on another horse to take a ride themselves. How the hell is a little baby supposed to stay on a carousel horse?

- The idiot bitch who actually did place a small toddler (like 1 year old) on a carousel horse by herself and got off the ride altogether. The baby actually managed to hold on, but when the 7-minute ride ended, the horse stopped in the up position and she was five feet in the air with no way of getting down. People were actually going around looking for the kid's mother.

-The women who dress like fucking prostitutes to go to the zoo. Booty shorts and spike heels? Really?

- The woman who stood in front of the sign that clearly said ARCTIC FOX and kept asking the keeper, "What is those? Is those some sorta cat?"

Fuck I hate people.

[elx]

could someone pleeease give me nine red pickles that way I'm not left out and I have a set that matches the i-bape and also aligns neatly with my avatar? that'd be pretty sweet.

[Pub Lover]

I'm only going to give you green pickles. :(

[Pub Lover]

Well, I AM the Dolemite of second generation Scots-Americans



Whose families were originally forced to emigrate to Scotland from Ireland after two great-great-uncles murdered an English soldier in cold blood :eek

Haha. My Scot ancestors were clamped in irons and emigrated to the Caribbean and then Canada for the Crime of Living In Scotland Under English Rule. :eek

But don't worry, they ran away to New Zealand to get rich on gold before going back to the UK to die in coal mines for no money. :lol

[Otto]

My german relatives didn't move to the United States until the end of World War 2. I guess we're all slow and kind of stupid :(.

EDIT: AND NO THEY WERE NOT MEMBERS OF THE NSDAP, THOSE RUMORS ARE COMPLETELY UNFOUNDED, ESPECIALLY THE ONES ABOUT THEM TRYING TO CLONE HITLER IN BRAZIL.

[executioneer]

ZOO HORROR

for the love of god, move

[executioneer]

Haha. My Scot ancestors were clamped in irons and emigrated to the Caribbean and then Canada for the Crime of Living In Scotland Under English Rule. :eek

But don't worry, they ran away to New Zealand to get rich on gold before going back to the UK to die in coal mines for no money. :lol
some of my scots-irish ancestors immigrated to the US America in the late 1600s :eek

don't know the motivation though!

[Otto]

I learned the hard way not to even insinuate that my great grandfather was a Nazi. I made a joke about it once when I was twelve and ten years later I can still hear him screaming at me in German.

[executioneer]

hahaha :(

[Fathom Zero]

I wish I knew anything about my family. I only know that half are well-to-do and half are likely to have more fingers than teeth.

[Otto]

I wish I knew anything about my family. I only know that half are well-to-do and half are likely to have more fingers than teeth.

Eh, it's a tricky situation. I don't know much about my family because the American branch begins at my great grandfather and ends with me. The rest of it is a mystery to me. We could be Sino-Russo-Mexican for all I know!

[Fathom Zero]

Biologically, my last name doesn't even belong to me. My father took it from the person who adopted him. I have no idea what my name would be otherwise nor where his father's from.

But I've gathered enough about my family to know that we're pretty much mutts, as is typical of most families who've been in America for a while.

Then again, I don't really give a damn about any of this. I look Scandinavian, anyway.

[Otto]

My mother's side of the family is the German one (the ones that didn't show up in the US until the fifties), my dad's side are a bunch of coal mining hicks from Tennessee and shadowy mafioso from New Jersey from what I've been able to gather.

[Fathom Zero]

My great-grandfather "did some things" for certain people in Pittsburgh, from what I understand. I didn't really ask further into it. Man had fists as big as your head, though, so I could see why.

[Grislygus]

GODDAMNIT, WILLIE

[Fathom Zero]

Ponies, ehh?

[LordSappington]

All I know about my family is that only one of my Mom's siblings and her family are cool, and the rest are losers who blame their shortcomings on everything but themselves. And my dad's side is full of people I don't know anything about, at all. I don't think he cares to talk to/about them much.
They're not bad people; they're just really boring.

[Pub Lover]

OR SPIES. :eek

[LordSappington]

I'm pretty sure a lady on my street is a spook. Her lawn is never cared for, and we never see her enter or leave her house; just sometimes, the lights are back on. I think that she has an elaborate underground tunnel system to get to her headquarters.
Or other people's houses....
Dun dun duuuuuun
Am I funny yet, guys?
Guys?

[Otto]

My great-grandfather "did some things" for certain people in Pittsburgh, from what I understand. I didn't really ask further into it. Man had fists as big as your head, though, so I could see why.

That's got to be pretty terrifying considering I wear a size 7 7/8 hat. That's 25 inches :chatter.

[Fathom Zero]

I meant generally. Everyone can plainly see you've got a massive head.

[Fathom Zero]

1bS4FYq8Er8

[Otto]

I meant generally. Everyone can plainly see you've got a massive head.

:lol

Most people dread wearing their bathing suit to the beach, I dread going hat shopping.

[Pub Lover]

I'm pretty sure a lady on my street is a spook. Her lawn is never cared for, and we never see her enter or leave her house; just sometimes, the lights are back on.
Sounds like a shut in.

[LordSappington]

Spook.

[Fathom Zero]

http://img853.imageshack.us/img853/6362/humanstain1.jpg

[executioneer]

GODDAMNIT, WILLIE

Ponies, ehh?

no i added him on facebook

or at least i think that's what it is

could be ponies i guess

[Babs]

i'm putting a user spread of 2 on repping because some people are just lazoring in on others and redding them for every post in a thread

and by 'some people' i mean 'tadao', and by 'others' i mean 'babs'

I was wondering why I have two sausages. Don't get me wrong, I love italian sausages just as much as the next man does, but I'm more of a pickle guy myself.

[executioneer]

they could be pickled sausages like they have sometimes in bars and shitty convenience stores

[Fathom Zero]

could be ponies i guess

inn'ernet ponies

[LordSappington]

they could be pickled sausages like they have sometimes in bars and shitty convenience stores
When I stopped by a WalMart in Florida, I saw multiple shelves filled with giant jars of pickled pig feet. What the fuck, Florida

[Otto]

Hey, don't knock the pickled pigs feet! Those motherfuckers are delicious! Not only do they taste like a chewy pickled sausage, but it looks kind of like you're eating a baby's leg/arm so you also get to feel like a zombie, or a cannibal, or whatever your bizarre fantasy is!

[thimanazahan]

On the official site there’s some honesty about exactly what to expect, with the admission that total removal of stretch marks will probably not occur. There’s also the admission that with Revitol, preventative measures work best. A pregnant woman is advised to start using it in the early stages of pregnancy. If a woman doesn’t consider buying Revitol until after she’s had the baby, she’s advised to not hesitate. The makers concede that the product works best on the newer, deeply-hued scars.

[executioneer]

SHUT UP DIDLO

[Pub Lover]

:pagebrak