I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

[executioneer]

I UPTATED GUYS :eek (http://home.blarg.net/~mobbswm/main.htm)

[MarioRPG]

Excellent material.

[MetalMilitia]

I need to go to the bank and get my overdraft extended as I have no money left.
I tried to get a job where I used to work, before I went to uni, but the new manager is a bitch. Basically my girlfriend still works at the store I applied for and the manager was all like "well I don't think Stefan can have the job because he invloved with Jen". Ironically she works with her boyfriend in another store on certain days of the week.

It's really stupid because I could start working straght away with no training. SOME PEOPLE.

[Esuohlim]

Hey Pub I wasn't going to even consider putting your new review up tomorrow because it was utterly boring but then I felt all bad because it has twice as many words as anything I ever wrote so far so now I might just put it up as a pity thing. :(

[Pub Lover]

That was exactly what I was going for. At first I thought of maybe splitting it in two and adding even more huge pictures, but I could barely read a paragraph of it without trying to put in another dick joke, so I just left it.

The only way I get anything in life is through pity. ;)

[Pub Lover]

That was exactly what I was going for. At first I thought of maybe splitting it in two and adding even more huge pictures, but I could barely read a paragraph of it without trying to put in another dick joke, so I just left it.

The only way I get anything in life is through pity. ;)

[Pub Lover]

That was exactly what I was going for. At first I thought of maybe splitting it in two and adding even more huge pictures, but I could barely read a paragraph of it without trying to put in another dick joke, so I just left it.

The only way I get anything in life is through pity. ;)

[Pub Lover]

That was exactly what I was going for. At first I thought of maybe splitting it in two and adding even more huge pictures, but I could barely read a paragraph of it without trying to put in another dick joke, so I just left it.

The only way I get anything in life is through pity. ;)

[Pub Lover]

I think I've forgotton how to use the internet! :(

[Esuohlim]

Egad! :eek

[Pub Lover]

http://www.abeautifulrevolution.com/photos/doodles/abox.jpg (http://www.abeautifulrevolution.com/abox.html)

[Pub Lover]

Hey Pub I wasn't going to even consider putting your new review up tomorrow because it was utterly boring but then I felt all bad because it has twice as many words as anything I ever wrote so far so now I might just put it up as a pity thing. :(
That's the Blake's 7 one right? Not the one I sent the day before that?

[GADZOOKS]

They gave me bum lettuce on my roast beef sandwhich, seriously it was like a clump of shit they put in a taco bell salad.

[executioneer]

was it lettuce that came out of a bum or did ythey put it in your bum :lol

[Esuohlim]

That's the Blake's 7 one right? Not the one I sent the day before that?

The Blake's 7 was the only one I got :(

[Esuohlim]

Oh wait, nevermind. For some reason your other one went into a Spam folder. :(

[Pub Lover]

I was thinking that it might have gone in a spam folder with that title.

[Pub Lover]

What the fuck is "Blake's 7"? Pub Lover wrote the most boring 4,000 words ever.
I completely forgot to mention that Blake's 7 is a British sci-fi show from the seventies. :(

[Pub Lover]

Pub Lover wrote the most boring 4,000 words ever.
:lol

[Pub Lover]

And that is the final season of Blake's 7.
And that is the final time you'll ever write anything for my site, Pub Lover.
:lol

[Pub Lover]

And now no one has any reason to read that fucking thing again! >:

[Esuohlim]

I probably won't put anymore of these sci-fi show reviews up unless you make them more interesting. I seriously did put this one up only because of its length and unless you ripped it off some other site you probably spent a lot of time writing it. :(

But your review of comics was stellar compared to the everything else you contributed so far, so that's definitely going up. :eek

Keep it in check. >:

[Pub Lover]

http://www.esuohlim.com/images/pub/b7-408.jpg

[Pub Lover]

OH SHIT! A DOOR?

[Pub Lover]

I only wrote the Blake's 7 one because a good ten hours after I sent you the comics piece you mentioned in Seven Force's thread that you wanted more of the shitty reviews. And yeah, I totally wrote the review. Go watch the show, it's nothing like the review because I was lying to make it more interesting. :(

I didn't want to write another shitty sci-fi review. :(

[Esuohlim]

I'll put up the comics piece Monday but I'm getting rid of that phony-baloney mouseover business. >:

And that image of Robin getting fucked in his vagina :(

[Pub Lover]

I totally knew that wouldn't make it into the online version. :lol

[funkyamunky]

jimmy smith - sagg shootin' his arrow

[funkyamunky]

jimmy smith - for everyone under the sun

[funkyamunky]

man is the bastard - freak machine

[executioneer]

whoops wrong thread hahah

[sadie]

tehee. esuohlim and publover sittin' in a tree.

[Fathom Zero]

Clive Barker's Undying is the scariest game I've ever played.

[MarioRPG]

Why haven't I heard of it then?

[Guitar Woman]

HEY GUYS WUDOIN

[executioneer]

takin' a break from cleaning out my car :x

[Guitar Woman]

I'm using Linux and a web browser called Galeon :x

[Esuohlim]

Guitar Woman do you even play guitar :suspicious

[Guitar Woman]

I do but to tell you the truth I'm a lot better at the piano :lame

[executioneer]

play us a song you're the piano woman :lol

[Guitar Woman]

holy fucking shit I just saw some guy looking at Kim Possible porn :(

[executioneer]

are you in a library or somethging

[Guitar Woman]

yeah, it's a really crappy downtown library too

I'm here to get on th' internet and steal every volume of Ranma 1/2 I can find

[executioneer]

well jeez it must be crappy if they've got linux on all the computors, the cheapskates :lol

[Guitar Woman]

also I'm pretty sure that they're all 450 mhzs :lol

[Emu]

do libraries even carry anime?

[Moobs]

http://idisk.mac.com/jenlart/Public/jfk-pink.jpg

[Sam]

I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY OUR VACATION FROM TERRA!

I KNOW I AM! :eek

[Seven Force]

Eat shit

[Sam]

I hope she never comes back.

[Seven Force]

Eat shit

[Moobs]

She keeps trying to put me in a 'the tick' costume :(

[Sam]

I hope she never comes back.

Ever.

[Seven Force]

Eat shit

[Esuohlim]

SAM I AM BEHIND YOU 100% ON THIS ONE PAL

[GADZOOKS]

Terra wouldn't be half as bad if she didn't try to point out usually obvious sexual innuendos in every thread or was compelled to explain something that is obvious.

Oh wait, that 90% of her routine besides congratulating people.

On a lighter note, you better be kidding about Neil Hamburger Milhouse/Top Then List Faggot/Gadzooks

[Esuohlim]

I myself have never heard or seen any of Neil Hamburger's routine, so I'm completely neutral about his placement on the list.

And the whole thing about Carlos Mencia originally being on the other list is completely true >:

[GADZOOKS]

Whoo, I was wondering considering I hate every other comedian on that list (although my number one would be Judy Gold).

On a side note I'm really impressed by how much stuff is on your website already, I wish I could have the dedication to do something like that but HTML gives me the creeps. It should be easy when you have the world's greatest shut-in working for you.

[executioneer]

hahaha what i'm not working for him what are you talking about

[Sam]

SAM I AM BEHIND YOU 100% ON THIS ONE PAL

I KNEW I WASN'T ALONE! :picklehat

[Sam]

[11:00] Switch Dingo: CASH RULES EVERYTHING AROUND ME C.R.E.A.M GET THE MONEY DOLLAH DOLLAH BILL YA'LL
[11:00] odbgfkgzarzaraek: fuck yeah man
[11:00] odbgfkgzarzaraek: WU-TANG AINT NOTHIN TO FUCK WIT
[11:00] Switch Dingo: CUZ IF YOU GOT BEEF THEN BRING THE RUCKUS WU-TANG CLAN AIN'T NOTHIN TAH FUCK WIT
[11:01] Switch Dingo: SAM AIN'T NUTHIN TAH FUCK WIT
[11:01] Switch Dingo: RONGI
[11:01] Switch Dingo: YOU HEAR ME
[11:01] odbgfkgzarzaraek: I HEAR
[11:01] Switch Dingo: HOLLER AT YOUR BOY
[11:01] odbgfkgzarzaraek: SHAME ON YOU WHEN YOU STEP TO THE OL DIRTY BASTARD
[11:01] odbgfkgzarzaraek: BROOKLYN ZOO
[11:02] odbgfkgzarzaraek: WHAT
[11:02] odbgfkgzarzaraek: MAH NIGGA
[11:02] Switch Dingo: I CALLS HIM JESUS
[11:03] odbgfkgzarzaraek: BIG BABY JESUS I CANT WAIT
[11:03] odbgfkgzarzaraek: NIGGA FUCK THAT I CANT WAAAAIT
[11:03] Switch Dingo: I'LL LAY YOUR NUTS ON A DRESSER
[11:03] Switch Dingo: JUST YOUR FUCKIN NUTS ON A DRESSER
[11:03] Switch Dingo: AND I'LL BANG THEM SHITS WITH A SPIKED BASEBALL BAT
[11:04] odbgfkgzarzaraek: what song is that from =-o
[11:05] Switch Dingo: it's from Enter the 36 Chambers =(
[11:05] Switch Dingo: it's a skit thinige =(
[11:05] odbgfkgzarzaraek: ooooooh yeah
[11:05] Switch Dingo: JEEZ RONGI :ROLLEYES
[11:05] odbgfkgzarzaraek: i fucking love that album :(
[11:06] Switch Dingo: OBVIOUSLY :ROLLEYES

[Rongi]

REST IN PEACE Ol' DIRTY :tear

also, fuck you terra :D

[Sam]

:lol This is now the "Everyone Be Happy That Terra Is Gone Except for Seven Force Who Is All Pouty Party Page!"

[Esuohlim]

They should decapitate her while video taping it that'd be so rad

[Benjamin_Franklin]

That's a cut scene from UHF.

[Emu]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v238/ikrsez/jesusgod.jpg

banned

[Benjamin_Franklin]

Chuck?

[Benjamin_Franklin]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v238/ikrsez/jesusgod.jpg

banned

I'm just trying to fit in.

[Emu]

and you've failed

[Moobs]

fuck you benjamin_Franklin
fuck you Terra
fuck you
fuckfducdckdcudkc

>:

[Benjamin_Franklin]

O RLY?

[Moobs]

http://tfp.killbots.com/fanart/sean/023_nibbler-looking-angry.jpg

lol u r a v.funny guy Mr Benjamin Franklin I bet you make ur friends lol lots

[Moobs]

ANGRY PAGE >:

[Emu]

I WILL BEAT U UP >:

[Benjamin_Franklin]

OMG! $75,000!

[Moobs]

I'LL SEE YOU AFTER SCHOOL FATTY >:

[GADZOOKS]

Ugh, who's in charge here again?

[Esuohlim]

Ugh, who's in charge here again?

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/9818/charles4rc.gif

[Pub Lover]

It should be easy when you have the world's greatest shut-in working for you.
hahaha what i'm not working for him what are you talking about
WILLIE! I WILL FIGHT YOU FOR THE CROWN OF WORLD'S GREATEST SHUT-IN! :eek

[Seven Force]

Yeah, I think I got you both beat on that one. :(

[Fathom Zero]

Stay Tuned is my new favourite movie.

[Cliff Steele]

I have everybody beat for world's greatest shut in! I work 3 days a week and otherwise don't leave my apartment. Seriously besides going to work I might leave for like 30 minutes a day tops. :paleskin

[Fathom Zero]

I don't work, nor do I shop for myself. So I don't have to leave the house for weeks on end.

[Pub Lover]

Yeah, well I work from home, live with my parents, have never kissed a girl, have no friends, never leave the house and I'm 23.

I win.

[Mockery]

Sorry to break your hearts, but Benjamin_Franklin will no longer be with us, nor will the 200+ posts he made today. I know, I know... try to hold back the tears if you can manage it.

[executioneer]

it's not like he wasn't given fair warning :x

[Emu]

Did he really post that much?

[Pub Lover]

If only Benjamin Franklin had kept it all in here, then we could've carried on hating him for weeks.


Mockery posting in this thread just doesn't seem right. :(

[executioneer]

Yeah, well I work from home, live with my parents, have never kissed a girl, have no friends, never leave the house and I'm 23.

I win.

well when i was 23 i also had not kissed any girls

and i'm now 29 and still have yet to get past "second base" (if i remeber the system properly)

and whattaya mean no friends does the internet not count :x :x :x

[Pub Lover]

I didn't mention the internet because then I'd probably talk about kissing a girl on the internet and that's a whole differant train to Losertown. :(

[Seven Force]

I kissed a lesbian once.


...does that count?

[Emu]

RIP BENJAMIN_FRANKLIN 6/25/2006 NEVER FORGET.

[Pub Lover]

How did you know the mirror was a lesbian?

[Fathom Zero]

I'm waiting 11 1/2 hours for my Prey demo to finish downloading.
What're you guys doing?

[Seven Force]

Configuring Thunderbird.

[Fathom Zero]

http://img389.imageshack.us/img389/2550/fordthunderbird1965a0pg.jpg

I fail to see how this can recieve email.

[Pub Lover]

http://www.newgenevacenter.org/portrait/franklin.jpg

[Pub Lover]

RIP BENJAMIN_FRANKLIN 6/25/2006 NEVER FORGET.

[Seven Force]

Fuck him.

Another useless poster bites the dick.

[Esuohlim]

Pub Lover I congratulate you. Your ramblings in today's update made me smile, and only with half-pity :x

[Esuohlim]

Oh wait I didn't put it up yet :lol

[Esuohlim]

There we go :eek

[Pub Lover]

Pub Lover I congratulate you. Your ramblings in today's update made me smile, and only with half-pity :x
ha. :(

[Pub Lover]

I still think it needs the picture of Batman fucking Robin in his vagina to round the article off. :(

[Mockery]

Hey guys, let's chat because, you know, that's where it's at! :lol

[Pub Lover]

I now remember that I wanted to bit in there where I mentioned that the bitchy fanboy letters in the back pages all seemed to come from "AOL".

But I never remember that sort of thing until a week after I've written the piece.

[Pub Lover]

Hey guys, let's chat because, you know, that's where it's at! :lol
Great, now I feel worse about my shitty article.

[executioneer]

what

[Fathom Zero]

You're an unknown quantity.

[MarioRPG]

Now that was uncalled for.

[executioneer]

http://home.blarg.net/~mobbswm/wasteofwillie.jpg
http://home.blarg.net/~mobbswm/causepeoplearejerks.jpg

NEWSPAPER COMICS ON THE INTERNET >:

[Esuohlim]

I just read that the suicide rate in Finland is double that of the U.S., Canada, Australia, and New Zealand. :eek

Not only did we get rid of Terra but we could lose Rankeri too :eek

[GADZOOKS]

I don't want Terra to die, I just want her to find another hobby like shopping or prostitution.

[Seven Force]

I hope she stays FOREVER. >:

[darnin]

*walks in*

*looks around*


*spontainuously combusts*

AHHHH!!!! THE PAIN!!!!!! BRIANS IN PAINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*dies*



...Yeah, that was random. And in case you're wondering, this is my first post. w00t!

[Sethomas]

I remember reading how Eisenhower would play up Scandanavia's suicide rate as a prime reason for why America should avoid socialism at all costs. He just kind of ignored that among American states, Alaska has the highest suicide rate, so it probably has more to do with perpetual darkness in the winter rather than taxes.

[executioneer]

S.O.-S.A.D. ;_;

[Esuohlim]

*walks in*

*looks around*


*spontainuously combusts*

AHHHH!!!! THE PAIN!!!!!! BRIANS IN PAINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*dies*

Actions expressed with asterisks. Strike one.

...Yeah, that was random.

Strike two.

w00t!

Out. >:

[Seven Force]

Yeah, seriously. That's fucking queer as hell.

Makes me sick just thinking about it.

This shit doesn't happen in MY (Esuohlim's) thread.

[darnin]

Does that mean I'm officially hated now?

[MarioRPG]

Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be banned within a week.

[Emu]

This guy is just Benjamin Franklin all over again.

darnin give me a hug!

[darnin]

:confused Ok, now I'm just confused...

[Mockery]

And people say I-Mockery's "newbie beatdown" is dead...

Psshaw!

[Seven Force]

What if either one of these is womti?

[darnin]

Not sure who womti is, but I'm pretty sure I'm not them. At least I can type correctly, unlike about 99.9% of the internet.

Newbie beatdown...sigh...

[executioneer]

we don't "beat down newbies" so much as "thresh the wheat from the chaff" >:

[Fathom Zero]

What's with the sudden influx of "these people"? Perhaps it was my absence over the weekend.

[Seven Force]

Ya know you were once "these people" yourself. :rolleyes

I, much worse.

I don't know why i'm still here. :(

[Fathom Zero]

Yeah. I was that annoying. But at least I didn't use emoticons like that or have a Lego avatar... or use l33t-speak.

[darnin]

See? Now can we get to something productive. If possible. Which I doubt.

[Fathom Zero]

By the way, I actually like that skull Lego avatar.

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/witmot.jpg

STU - Well, that's the end of the series and the show--

ROD HULL - What is the meaning of this?! I went to that hotel to get the jelly you mentioned. There was none to be seen! How dare you treat ME, Rod Hull, like that?!

STU - Well, I wouldn't treat Rod Hull like that, but you are not the real Rod Hull, are you?

ROD HULL - [In a strange quacking voice] I AM ROD HULL!

RICH - Stu, he says he's Rod Hull. He must be!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/imposter.jpg

STU - Rich, I have suspected for two weeks now that we have been dealing with an imposter. A sly imposter, but an imposter none the less, and I now I think I've found someone who can prove it! Will you please welcome the evidence!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/rodrod.jpg

[THE REAL ROD HULL WALKS ON STAGE TO HUGE APPLAUSE]

RICH - I can't believe my eyes! There must be a mirror!

STU - Thanks for coming on the show here tonight.

THE REAL ROD HULL - Stewart, thankyou very much in deed for asking me. That's awfully kind of you.

STU -Now, you claim that you are the real Rod Hull.

THE REAL ROD HULL - I don't claim, I am Rod Hull.

THE FALSE ROD HULL - No, no! I am you-- ME. I AM ROD HULL! Anyway, you don't look anything like Rod Hul-- me, I mean!

THE REAL ROD HULL - I'll tell you what, I've brought something along. Look, see that? It's a photo of me and Emu and it says underneath 'Rod Hull and Emu'.

And another thing, I've found a film clip. That would prove it.

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/ebc1.jpg

[CLIP PLAYS OF ROD HULL AND EMU]

ROD HULL - [TO EMU] Stop it! It's that fly again. [TO AUDIENCE] Do you know you've got a fly in your television set?

[CLIP ENDS]

THE REAL ROD HULL - So, I hope that all proves it to you. That piece of film and that photograph was manifest, undeniable, graphic, evidence that I am the real Rod Hull and you are a mere fabrication.

THE FALSE ROD HULL - No, no, no!! That was manifest, undeniable, graphic, proof that I'm the REAL ROD HULL and you are FALSE!

THE REAL ROD HULL - That is no argument, is it? All you've done is to use the same words that I've used and put your own inflection on it! You do it all the time!

THE FALSE ROD HULL - You do it all the time!

THE REAL ROD HULL - You're doing it now!

THE FALSE ROD HULL - You're doing it now, aren't you!

THE REAL ROD HULL - You're the fake, I'm original! You want to be me? Do you know what you want? You want the Moon on a stick!

Tell me something, False Rod, is that a real arm?

THE FALSE ROD HULL - Yes! It is a real arm, False Rod!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/rodarm.jpg

[THE REAL ROD HULL PULLS THE FALSE ARM OFF THE FALSE ROD HULL]

Ow! Ow! My real arm! Now there will be real blood all over the stage!

[THE REAL ROD HULL PULLS BACK THE FALSE ROD HULL'S JACKET TO REVEAL THE FALSE ROD'S REAL ARM]

Ah, oh! It's grown back! It's a miracle!!

RICH - Rod, stop making a fool of yourself. Answer me a question: Are you the Real Rod Hull?

[FALSE ROD LOOKS AT REAL ROD]

No, you!

THE FALSE ROD HULL - Oh...Yes, I am the real Rod Hull!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/rurodrod.jpg

[THE REAL ROD HULL PULLS THE FALSE CHIN OFF OF THE FALSE ROD HULL]

RICH - And this ridiculous wig.

THE FALSE ROD HULL - No, no! The hair is real.

RICH - Oh, sorry. I'm going to ask you the question once again. Listen carefully to what I say. Think very carefully before you answer: Are you the Real Rod Hull, Rod?

THE FALSE ROD HULL - [VERY QUIETLY] No.

RICH - What did you say?

THE FALSE ROD HULL - NO, I'M NOT! I'M NOT HIM!

RICH - I'm very cross with you, False Rod Hull. I trusted you and now look an idiot in front of everyone!

THE FALSE ROD HULL - I-I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. Can I now please have my JELLY!

STU - No you can't! [TO AUDIENCE] No, don't encourage him.

You've got over four bowls of jelly out of this show under false pretences. No way!

THE FALSE ROD HULL - Excuse me, real, genuine, three-dimensional Rod Hull.

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/sansevery.jpg

[FALSE ROD KNEELS IN FRONT OF STU]

Please! I luuuuuurrrrrrrvvvvee Jelly!

STU -No, off you go.

THE FALSE ROD HULL - Awww. [FALSE ROD CRAWLS OFF STAGE] Oh no! What shall I do? What shall become of me?! Sans arm, sans chin, sans jelly. Sans everything.

RICH - Rod, I can only say I'm filled with embarresment over this incident. It's terrible.

THE REAL ROD HULL - Well, I honestly don't know how you two chaps were taken in by that.

RICH - Well, you know, he came in, this man (whoever he is) and said he was the real Rod Hull. Why should we doubt him? He went through a lot of trouble with that disguise just to get a few bowls of jelly.

THE REAL ROD HULL - Have you thought of it from my point of view? I mean, it's almost offensive, isn't it? How can you expect that cheap and tawdry character, that reprobate, that dropout, that amateur, to be me? Really me? He doesn't look like me, doesn't talk like me, doesn't dress like me.

And the arm was false.

I think this whole episode has been a bit... juvenile.

RICH - Well, all I can say Rod is that we are genuinely very sorry for any offense. Really, we really are.

THE REAL ROD HULL - Right, I accept that.

Now, can I have my jelly?


[THE REAL ROD ATTACKS RICH AND STU] You said I could have jelly!

[SHRIEKING] GREEN JELLY! BECAUSE I LOVE JELLY!!! I AM ROD HULL!!!!!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/heis.jpg

HE FALSE ROD HULL - He is Rod Hull.

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/jelly.jpg

STU - All right, here you go.

THE REAL ROD HULL - Ah, thank you. Jelly. [STU PUTS THE SPOON IN ONE OF REAL ROD'S REAL HANDS, BUT HE SEEMS UNABLE TO HOLD IT AND IT DROPS TO THE FLOOR] So, is another series of Fist of Fun in the pipeline?

[RICH AND STU LOOK DOWNCAST]

RICH - Ladies and Gentlemen, Rod Hull!!

[REAL ROD TAKES HIS JELLY WITH HIM OFF STAGE]

STU - That's the end of the series--

RICH - No, Stu, hold on! We've been fooled! We've just trusted him like we trusted the first guy! How can we be sure he is the real Rod Hull?

STU - Rich, how can we ever be sure of anything?

THE REAL ROD HULL - I am Rod Hull.

[Fathom Zero]

R.I.P. Rod Hull.

[darnin]

Am I missing something here?

[Fathom Zero]

No. Nothing at all. Why do you ask?

[Pub Lover]

I AM ROD HULL! :jelly

[darnin]

EVERYONE HERE IS CRAZY! Wait, since, everyone here...I'm here...Yay!

[Seven Force]

You Limes/Kiwis and your telly. :rolleyes

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v292/SevenForce/brittv.png

[Pub Lover]

Yeah.

[Seven Force]

I hate being ignored. :(

[Cliff Steele]

oh man :( . the worst is being ignored by g-g-g-irls

[Fathom Zero]

Screw the girls, bro.

Anyways, go here and get a free trial to Planetside for 9 months:

http://planetside.station.sony.com/reserves/download.vm

[Seven Force]

I got a random message from someone I don't know.

Here's the kicker: I just switched to a new name, and I haven't used it anywhere. Either they got lucky picking a random name out of a hat or someone's giving away my screename.

...or it's one of you people.

[Fathom Zero]

Creepy as hell, dude.

[Fathom Zero]

Hehe... I can't use Planetside, because it requires a 4 Gig download.
I will have it, though.

[Jeff The Ninja]

I just sent an article to Esuohlim.com. What are the chances of it actually being accepted.

[Esuohlim]

I'll give you guys a hint on this one! The word count was 270. :eek

[Seven Force]

That's not really much.

[Jeff The Ninja]

Ok, So I will make it longer. Dont worry, I have a ton of ideas. It should be finished by tomorrow if I work at it. I can easily bring it up to 1000 plus words :)

[executioneer]

god dammit i hate when the weather jumps 25 degrees in three days :(

[Esuohlim]

It was supposed to be sunny all week but then the weatherman was like "Whoops actually it's going to thunderstorm nonstop until through the following Tuesday haha that's eight days fuckers, enjoy". so now I'm all P.O.ed >:

[executioneer]

it was 92 here, and a week ago it didn't even break 70 :(

[sadie]

lol. i don't have a lot of ideas. but i can add 700 words. easy!

[Emu]

milhouse i could write something!

[Fathom Zero]

That Man could also write something.

[Esuohlim]

milhouse i could write something!

ok!

[Emu]

do you mind if i write about small claims court TV shows like Judge Judy and Judge Mathis cuz i've been all obsessed with those lately!

[Juttin]

Does that mean I'm officially hated now?

:Sociallyretarded

[Esuohlim]

Emu that sounds like a grand idea, pal!

[Fathom Zero]

I haven't changed my "Zits" calander since February 2nd.

[Esuohlim]

I threw away my America: The Book (The Calendar) desk calendar in April.

[Fathom Zero]

Why would you do that?

[Esuohlim]

I haven't touched it since the middle of January. :(

[executioneer]

lol @ out-of-context :lol

[Esuohlim]

:x

[Seven Force]

Now it's time for an intermission with the comedy stylings of Esuohlim and Pub Lover!

Pub Lover: Hello, I am Pub Lover. I was born not far from here and due to a crippling fear of everything I have never been more than five kilometers from my home.

Esuohlim: Good morning, I am Esuohlim, I write articles for a website no one reads and at my leisure I drive my car around town and try to memorize traffic signs.

Pub Lover: Pleased to meet you, Esuohlim. I often take photographs of my favorite vast stretches of dirt. I have over six thousand photographs of the windswept brown field outside of my dwelling, completely barren, and I would love to show them to you one day.

Esuohlim: That would delight me, Pub Lover. I am eager to tell you about the dream I had last night, in which I was forever trying to solve an infinite sliding tile puzzle—

Pub Lover: Enough! I yield!

Esuohlim: Yes, that was among the signs I memorized!

[Jeff The Ninja]

That was enthraling seven force. Good Show.

Now, lets talk about spatulas.

For example, I have a black one. And a Metal one. But I wish I had a Red one.

[GADZOOKS]

go fry yourself

[Sethomas]

Be glad you're not a Muslim Saudi who threw away Saudi Arabia: The Book (The Calander), because it's considered sinful and offensive to them to discard anything with the Saudi flag on it because it contains the opening lines of the Qua'ran!

[Pub Lover]

Pub Lover: Hello, I am Pub Lover. I was born not far from here and due to a crippling fear of everything I have never been more than five kilometers from my home.
Kilometre. >:


Americans. :rolleyes

[MarioRPG]

3 huzzahs for the metric system.

[Pub Lover]

Hahaha go outside and get some sun.

Oh wait it's winter there isn't it :rolleyes
Fuck your advice, asshole. >:

[Pub Lover]

If I did get a tan, I'd be kicked out of my Vampires Alive! group, and they are my only RL friends.

[Pub Lover]

:(

[executioneer]

lol :(

[Pub Lover]

Hey Esuohlim, what about posting a picture of your face? >:

[darnin]

Speaking of spatulas...

They rock. Have you seen RoG's Power Spatula from Hell? The King of Spatulas.

[Fathom Zero]

Who wants to play Volleyball with me?

[Esuohlim]

Hey Esuohlim, what about posting a picture of your face? >:

lol no way man

[Rongi]

i had oral surgery today. they gave me anasthesia which made me all loopy and not caring. they had a radio in the operating room playing Proud Mary by CCR and i started singing along while they operated. i think they sang along too

[Fathom Zero]

I'm watching a episode of X Files on Sci-Fi with Burt Reynolds and I have no idea what it's about, yet I must keep watching.

Suffice it to say, I am no longer interested in playing volleyball. Sorry, folks. :(

[Rongi]

milhouse, no offense i like you and everything, but there is absolutely nothing funny or entertaining about your website at all

[Esuohlim]

Every time I see that the last post was by you in this thread I expected you to say that. :(

All I know is that I know about 10 personally that like it and I have about 8 people, only half I know personally, that want to and do contribute to it so I comfortable with my current fan base. Appealing to the masses is only a hopeful aspiration. :(

We're still buds. :(

[Rongi]

looking back, that was probably a needlessly harsh thing to say. i'm sorry buddy :(

i think the tone of the site is what bothers me or something. maybe i could write something for it?

[Esuohlim]

Absolutely, pal :D

[Esuohlim]

I just received an iPod charger I bought for 1 cent on Amazon. Shipping and handling was $5.99 though :/

It's better than buying it for $30 from Apple >:

[Seven Force]

I'm waiting to get my replacement iPod Nano because after a year of dropping it and using it as an anal pleasure device it crapped out on me.

[Seven Force]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v292/SevenForce/wat24vr.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

Why'd you have to bring that up again?
Now I'm grossed out.

[Moobs]

Yes
Female
16-17 I guess
:/

[MarioRPG]

I guess they like to keep a wide range of options open.

[Esuohlim]

Fwd: Re: Fresh stuff Enjoy multi-orgasms using this powerful thing

Dear member, If you lie down with dogs you will come up with fleas Life is like a box of
chocolates, sometimes hard, sometimes soft Loving life is living Books and friends should be few There is a time to speak and a time to be silent

Enjoy multiple orgasms with the power of proverbs I guess is the point :x

[Pub Lover]

http://www.st-uff.co.nz/inl/common/imageViewer/0,1445,243385,00.jpg
I'd hit it. :mcdonalds

[Pub Lover]

I'm watching a episode of X Files on Sci-Fi with Burt Reynolds and I have no idea what it's about, yet I must keep watching.
I remember that episode. I think Burt Reynolds is meant to be God. :eek

Which is a stone cold fact! >:

[Pub Lover]

milhouse, no offense i like you and everything, but there is absolutely nothing funny or entertaining about your website at all
I think that most days. :(

[Pub Lover]

http://www.s!tuff.co.nz/inl/common/imageViewer/0,1445,243385,00.jpg

Uh oh! :banned

[Pub Lover]

I'm not sure if I should edit those posts. :/

[Pub Lover]

Fine they're edited. >:

[Pub Lover]

Red eckses! :eek

[Esuohlim]

I think that most days. :(

sigh

[Pub Lover]

Mostly the days that I'm With Stupid, Top Ten Faggot, or my own self are the update.

[Pub Lover]

STU -If you read the papers yesterday, or a week ago if it's now the Friday night repeat, you'll have seen Judge Mr Justice Harman resigned. He's a judge notable for making a few crazy statements in his career. Perhaps the most outrageous was when a woman in his court asked to be addressed as Ms, and he said "I've always thought there are only three types of women in the world; wives, whores and mistresses."

RICH -Ridiculous thing to say. It's awful isn't it? I mean, there are only two types of women; wives and whores.

[Pub Lover]

RICH -NO, I'm joking! In the bad old days, in the seventies, men used to genuinely believe that there were only two types of women, the angel and the whore. I'm glad I live in the nineties with The Spice Girls and girl power. They've shown how ridiculous that idea is. There are actually five types of women.

STU -That's just as biased!

RICH -Five very distinct types, Stu. Not two, like you and Bernard Manning think.

STU -I don't think that! I've said!

[Pub Lover]

RICH -And the Spice Girls each represent one of the five types.

STU -I'd love to see you explain how that works.

RICH -All right, Stu, I will with the aid of these cardboard cut-outs.

The first type of woman, of the five, is represented by Posh Victoria Spice. She's sophisticated, she's a lady. Not the kind of woman you can take to Pizza Hut, no. She's classy. You'd have to take her to Pizza Express.

STU -You can't say that! It's sexist!

RICH -It's not! Only one in five women are like that. Not one in two, like you and Jim Davidson think.

STU -I don't think that! I said!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/scary.jpg
RICH -The second type of women is represented by Scary Mel B. She represents the kind of woman who is obsessed with sex. Sex! Sex! Sex! That's all she thinks about! She wants it Stu! She's a whore! A jezebel! She's a harlot! She's a bed bucket!

STU -A bed bucket?

RICH -Yes, Stu! She wants it! It's not sexist. Only one in five women are like that, Stu. Not one in two like you and Geoffrey Boycott think.

STU -I don't think that!

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/ginger.jpg
RICH -The third type of woman is represented by Ginger Geri. She's the one with the red hair. Though, if you've seen the photos of her on the Internet doing that Kung-Fu kick you'll know she's not a natural red head. She's a leader, Stu. She's powerful, she's manipulative. She manipulates men to do what she wants.

STU -You can't say that.

RICH -She's like Margaret Thatcher, but with a nicer arse.

[Pub Lover]

RICH - The fourth type of woman is represented by Baby Emma. She represents the one in five women who are blond... and nothing else.

STU -You can't say that!

RICH -One in five are like that, not one in two like you and Skeletor think.

STU -I don't think that! [TO AUDIENCE] Don't clap him!

RICH -No, it's true.

[Pub Lover]

RICH -The final type of woman is represented by Sporty Melanie Chisholm.

STU -Chisholm?

RICH -Chisholm, Stu. Jissom.

She represents the final twenty percent of women, which is ugly women... who can jump.

STU -You can't say that!

[Pub Lover]

RICH -She's got an ugly face, Stu, but boy watch her leap. It's incredible! Look, like a Zebedee or something!

STU -Are you saying that nature has given her the jumping ability as some kind of compensation for the ugliness? Is that it?

RICH -I think that's too simplistic an explanation; the nature argument. That's what a lamb would think.

STU -Don't patronise me.

[Pub Lover]

RICH -I think it's nurture. I think Melanie Chisholm--

STU -Chisholm?

RICH -Chisholm, Stu. Chisholm has been nurtured by society to jump, right? I think Melanie Chisholm was born. She looked in the mirror.

STU -What? In the hospital?

RICH -Yeah.

STU -As a baby?

RICH -Yeah. She thought "Oh dear, I'm a bit ugly. Better learn a skill ."

STU -What? Jumping up and down?

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/sporty2.jpg

RICH -Yeah, men love a jumping woman. You think about it, jumping is the only way an ugly woman can procreate. Imagine the scene, you're sitting in your house, minding your own business, right. Melanie Chisholm--


STU -Chisholm?

RICH -Chisholm, kind of leapt in through your window, did a cartwheel across the floor, did a backflip up onto your lap. Collected your gametes.

STU -Chisholm?

RICH -No, gametes is more polite, Stu. In her ovaries, and be out the window before you've had a chance to look at her. Just as she disappearing down the street you'll go "Hold on, she's a bit ugly!"

Too late, Stu! She's got your gametes! The ugly-woman line will continue! YAAAAY! I can feel them fertilising!

[Pub Lover]

http://www.esuohlim.com/images/ozone.jpg
THE OZONE-LAYER IS DEPLETING, JOURNAL! HELP!
I don't know why you Americans care, it's not directly over your country. :rolleyes

[Pub Lover]

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.patrick/imposter.jpg

I AM ROD HULL!

[executioneer]

THE OZONE-LAYER IS DEPLETING, JOURNAL! HELP!
I don't know why you Americans care, it's not directly over your country. :rolleyes

oh would you cut it out already

[Fathom Zero]

http://img211.imageshack.us/img211/9685/keysersoze6pi.jpg

Made it myself, a testament to my artistic skills.
That, and I've been on a bit of a Usual Suspects rush lately.

[GADZOOKS]

It's Kevin Spacey.

[MetalMilitia]

I told one of my friends that, like 3-4 years after the film was released and he got in a piss with me for ages. I would understand if the film had just been released but after so long it really was his fault for not seeing it already.

[executioneer]

ok but is keizer soze really from K-PAX or is he just crazy i don't get it

[MarioRPG]

I told one of my friends that, like 3-4 years after the film was released and he got in a piss with me for ages. I would understand if the film had just been released but after so long it really was his fault for not seeing it already.
I haven't seen it. :(

[Esuohlim]

Guys I'm afraid to post in the Zod forum :( :(

[GADZOOKS]

These extra forums are geting stupidly out of hand.

Willie, I need to know do you like cody lambert?

[Girl Drink Drunk]

Some fucking idiots came in 5 minutes before ten (before we stop making food), and ordered chicken wings and nachos (2 trays I think). That cost us a fucking hour >:

[executioneer]

Willie, I need to know do you like cody lambert?

who is cody lambert

[executioneer]

this guy? (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0593711/)

[Pub Lover]

As much as I like Topher Grace, he shouldn't be any villain in any movie. Even Pub could beat up Topher Grace.
I think it would be close, but yeah, I'd win. >:



:lol

[Fathom Zero]

Some fucking idiots came in 5 minutes before ten (before we stop making food), and ordered chicken wings and nachos (2 trays I think). That cost us a fucking hour >:

That sucks, man. I'm sorry.

And Keyser Soze is really played by 5 people:

Bryan Singer, who dropped the cigarette in the first scene.
Kevin Spacey, of course.
Bryan's assistant, who played the young Keyser in all of his scenes.
A stuntman.
And one other guy whose name escapes me at this moment.

You'd know all this if you had the special edition DVD, like I do. :P

[GADZOOKS]

this guy? (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0593711/)

Oh well if you dont know him that well then forget about my idea :(

*PSST* it was for your CD :(

[executioneer]

was that who you were talking about though

cause it's been over a decade since i watched step by step

[Seven Force]

MOP AN' GLOW! MOP AN' GLOW!

[Chojin]

to be fair, gadzooks, zod had his own entire message board before on ezboard. rog probably just moved it over here instead and told all the regulars about it.

BUT HE STILL DIDN'T CLEAR IT WITH ME

NOT HAVING INTERNET IS NO EXCUSE



I HAVE A FAX, MAN

[Fathom Zero]

What is the song playing during the scene in Ferris Bueller's Day Off where Ferris is racing home at the end of the movie? I really need to know.

[executioneer]

is it one of these http://www.allthelyrics.com/lyrics/ferris_buellers_day_off_soundtrack/

[Esuohlim]

Probably not, since there were no lyrics. Unless they took them out in the movie. :/

Unless there actually is a Ferris Bueller soundtrack that has an instrumental. :(

[executioneer]

www.idiotsavant.com/bueller/soundtrack.htm+ferris+bueller%27s+day+off+soundtra ck&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=2]HONK (http://72.14.203.104/search?q=cache:H2l2wjjjbd4J:[url) HONK[/url]

[Fathom Zero]

Yeah, the second to last track, number 15:
March of the Swivelheads.

[Sam]

GUYS!

TERRA IS STILL GONE! :eek

ENJOY IT!

[Fathom Zero]

Animated gifs are no longer animated on my computer, what should I do?

[Jixby Phillips]

GO OUT AND MEET SOME PEOPLE

[Fathom Zero]

http://www.last.fm/user/FathomZero/

Last.fm is my new favourite website.

[Moobs]

I hardly know any of those bands :(

[Misdemonar]

Animated gifs are no longer animated on my computer, what should I do?

Stop using it.