I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

[Tadao]

:pagebrak

Yes, I agree methane right from the asshole of a young cafe.

A cafe? Is this the preview of the great text adventure you want to show the world?

[Tadao]

DBL Wut?

[Guitar Woman]

nothing better than starbucks farts

[executioneer]

gw you should try taking 1mg of melatonin half a hour before when you want to go to bed, and see if it helps

[executioneer]

AND IF IT DOESN'T, MAYBE TRY 2 or 3

[kahljorn]

TRY GETTING REALLY DRUNK THAT USUALLY MAKES ME TIRED

[kgp4death]

I masturbate before going to bed knocks me right out.

:wank -> :sleep

[Guitar Woman]

Diphenhydramine knocked me right the fuck out when I tried to use it for a buzz on the cheap, so maybe I should invest in more Benadryl

[kahljorn]

yea benadryl makes me tired and uncomfortable too

I think only opium addicts or old people can get acceptable buzzes off of benadryl

[Guitar Woman]

Well, it's really a dosage thing

50 to 250 milligrams is a recreational dose resulting in a body high if you can fight through the drowsyness, and above 750 milligrams you start tripping complete balls and seeing spiders everywhere and shit.

I mean, that's what I read :<

Testimony dictates that DPH isn't really a fun drug and more for curiosity seekers or people who like getting the shit scared out of them.

[Kitsa]

if you have any endocrine problems whatsoever, I recommend NOT fucking around with benadryl or decongestants in experimental doses.

[Fathom Zero]

Oh why not. I say take as much of it as you can stomach.

[RaNkeri]

Let all the children boogie

[stevetothepast]

when I wanna go to bed I usually pop a xanax and drink 4 beer.

20 minutes-knocked out

[Babs]

Melatonin will work. Over the counter and affordable.

[executioneer]

yeah melatonin's cheaper than benadryl

[Fathom Zero]

What would you need to take if you don't want to feel anymore?

[Pub Lover]

A bullet.

[Fathom Zero]

I knew Pub would come through for me.

[Babs]

I stopped feeling along time ago. I feel like the only people I can relate with are like Korn, Slipknot, Static X, and Raffi.

[Fathom Zero]

http://www.imeem.com/9262446/music/ns-OAbIj/the-motherhood-soul-town/

[Zhukov]

What the heck are you guys doing so wrong you require medication to sleep properly? GW if you are busy doing homework or studying all day and night, then the only advice I can muster is that you should study harder and faster.

[Dimnos]

I stopped feeling along time ago. I feel like the only people I can relate with are like Korn, Slipknot, Static X, and Raffi.

Im sorry. :lol


But again Im telling you...

http://productprincesses.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/tylenol_pm_extra_strength.jpg

You cant go wrong.

[executioneer]

and i'm telling you melatonin's 1/4 the price and doesn't have any unnecessary potentially liver-destroying pain relievers in it

[elx]

:pagebrak

[elx]

to whoever thinks i'm like GW :(
otherwise just ignore
I'm calling out elx. She is doing a GW and pretending to be a 16 year old girl.

She is actually a 19 year old girl. Could be wrong.
i don't know any better way to prove that i am a 16 year old girl, but this is the last time i'll try:(

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww161/kelcnr/two.jpg

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww161/kelcnr/three.jpg

two of my trophies, U12 and U14 soccer teams, year 2005 & 2006
i scribbled out the region, my last name, and the team's name, cause i don't want to get kidnapped~

i was twelve on the U12 team in 2005 and thirteen on the U14 team in 2006, if i were now 19 i would've been 15 on the U12 team which isn't allowed.

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww161/kelcnr/one.jpg

bedframe&co, do note the trophy which i just stuck up there

things would be so much easier if i had my driver's license:(
i hope you're convinced, aussieman

[Fathom Zero]

He's Tazmanian!

And my letters are better than yours, but your numbers are way better than mine. :(

[Dimnos]

Sadly pictures on the interweb prove nothing. :(

[elx]

Sadly pictures on the interweb prove nothing. :(
yeah of course, because between the time zhukov accused me of being a 19 year old girl this morning and then the time i read his post and took the pictures i could've totally set up a 16 year old girl's bedroom, purchased soccer trophies, taken a latin quiz, made a solar system mobile and kidnapped a young lady.

seriously though, there's a point at which denying the level of believability is just outright paranoia:(

[Guitar Woman]

that sounds like an argument I'd make, miss elx

[LordSappington]

I think I've hit a new level of procrastinating when I'm browsing the forum on my laptop in class.

[Guitar Woman]

I do that so much :(

Sometimes I'll pretend to be working and play text-based games like Zork and Nethack

[Tadao]

and kidnapped a young lady.

I saw no pictures of a young lady.

[Sam]

THAT IS WHO WAS TAKING THE PICTURES

[Tadao]

There is no proof of that!

[Dimnos]

yeah of course, because between the time zhukov accused me of being a 19 year old girl this morning and then the time i read his post and took the pictures i could've totally set up a 16 year old girl's bedroom, purchased soccer trophies, taken a latin quiz, made a solar system mobile and kidnapped a young lady.

seriously though, there's a point at which denying the level of believability is just outright paranoia:(

Who said you even took the pictures? You could have just stolen them off the web somewhere. The real question is why do you feel the need to prove anything?

[Tadao]

I'll help her prove when she's 18.

[RaNkeri]

Holy fucking shit! I can't get it out of my head

[captain516]

Latin quiz?

[RaNkeri]

Theres a starman waiting in the sky
Hed like to come and meet us
But he thinks hed blow our minds
Theres a starman waiting in the sky
Hes told us not to blow it
Cause he knows its all worthwhile
He told me:
Let the children lose it
Let the children use it
Let all the children boogie

[RaNkeri]

Oh and yea, I passed my latin quiz, although I'm taking another quiz and try to rise my grade

[captain516]

Do they speak latin in Finland

[Kitsa]

my mom got out of the oncologist's office today with nothing of note having gone wrong.

That's a rarity for us, hooray for small victories.

[Tadao]

Time for pie! Or cake if you prefer that.

[Kitsa]

I have neither.

Time for fudge?

[Tadao]

Always time for fudge.

[Aaarg]

speaking of cancer, this girl at work just found out she has lymphoma. i tried to think of advice to give her without mentioning my mother, but all i could come up with is "well, never lose hope."

[Kitsa]

lymphoma is shitty. Mom's first cancer was hodgkin's.

It sucks, and then it sucks some more.

[Aaarg]

i feel bad for the girl. she's only 22-26 or so.

the worst part, because it apparently can get worse than having cancer--she doesn't have insurance. she was going to sign up for insurance next month through the company, but now she has pre-existing conditions. i can't imagine.

i remember my mom getting an invoice at the end of the year about what her insurance company paid for her, and it was something like $400,000.

but then again she had cancer all through her skeletal system and elsewhere at the time.

[Aaarg]

noooooo

[Kitsa]

If she can get her doctors to coordinate with her, she might be able to get some sort of temporary disability insurance through the state.

[Aaarg]

for her sake, that would be good. well fuck, for anyone's sake, that would be good.

[Kitsa]

as far as the preexisting condition, you're right...if she's anywhere but Massachusetts, she's fucked. Yet another great perk to having cancer.

Edited to add link:

http://www.dhhs.state.nc.us/dma/

[Aaarg]

no way, we're in the south.

[Pub Lover]

Aww, Man. :(

Health and Science thread, please?

what'd this guy do to make you guys be such douchebags to him?

I prefer it when there isn't a reason. :(

i don't want to get kidnapped~

Be sure to tell us if you change your mind. :(

[Kitsa]

Well, hell, let's all get out of Pub's thread, please.

[Pub Lover]

That'll be great, Thanks. :(

[elx]

:( :( :( :( :( :( :(

[Dimnos]

:)

[captain516]

>:

[LordSappington]

:lol2

[Aaarg]

http://klimp.dk/glown/paint/die.gif

[Zhukov]

Hey elx I'm sorry, I was only joking about you actually being 19. It was more of a joke leaning towards what some people in that thread would have liked to be the truth, rather than being mean to you.

[b_squared]

Damn horse bucked me off. I fractured my L2,L3,L4 vertebrae. Spent the weekend in the hospital.
:(

[Tadao]

good drugs?

[b_squared]

Norco is all they gave me to go home with.

[Tadao]

Ah well. How serious is the damage, are your disks ok?

[Tadao]

Shit, Sorry Pubbles :(

[b_squared]

Fx the transverse processes. Discs ok.

Sorry Pub...Next time health thread.

[Tadao]

http://mashable.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/for-your-health.png

[b_squared]

:)
I may have more time to hang around here for a while.

[Tadao]

While on Hydrocodone!

[Womti]

While on Hydrocodone!

I hate you. and your rabbit. >:

[Tadao]

:oao

[Womti]

just please wear a jawbrace.

[Tadao]

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Emotion/pageblak.gif


WHY DO YOU GUYS HATE ME?

[kgp4death]

Because, you are a little pussy man with a big stupid mouth (like you got to compensate for a small penis or something).....:bestthread

[Tadao]

Every time to try to ham it up with the guys you manage to look even more sad and pathetic.

[Tadao]

BTW, your friends call you Krupesh. What kind of a name is that? Oh yeah, I know.

In Gujarat, Krupesh is a name commonly given to those children in which the gender was thought to be known to be a female.

[Tadao]

Where did you go Mija? 7-11 get all of a sudden?

[kgp4death]

You cn't get under my skin.....try harder....Bitch

[Chojin]

why do you people dare him

why

[Tadao]

You cn't get under my skin.....try harder....Bitch

quoting for history

[Babs]

go get a green card.....Bitch

[kgp4death]

not good enough.

[kgp4death]

Anyway at this point i would probably prefer being deported back to england.

[Babs]

I'd prefer you get ran over by car and be told you'd never be able to walk again.

[kgp4death]

sweet...disability

[Dimnos]

Yo Punjab. That would mean you have a limp dick for the rest of your life.

[Dimnos]

No more sticking it in little boy butts.

[MarioRPG]

why do you people dare him

why

We're simply amazed that he's still active.

[LordSappington]

Yo Punjab. That would mean you have a limp dick for the rest of your life.
Hey, he's not using it anyways. :lol2

[Kitsa]

Tonight is our trick or treat except the backwards-ass hicks here call it "beggar's night".

I don't think we've gotten a single kid. I personally witnessed the neighbors load up a vanload of kids so they could drive off somewhere where the houses are closer together or something.

The pizza guy didn't even take a pixy stik :(

The funny thing is, I used to live in the "rich" neighborhood of my old town and kids used to come from town because they thought everyone gave out full-size candy bars and shit. In reality, that rarely happened. Our neighborhood had cardiologists handing out cholesterol charts and dentists handing out toothbrushes. The kids made that long trek from house to house for nothing.

Except for the lady across the street, who was a showoff. Whenever a kid sold those giant fundraiser candy bars, she bought the whole box and that's what she gave out for halloween. She put them on her front porch with a "just take one" sign and then jumped out and scared anyone who tried to make off with more.

[executioneer]

jumping out and terrifying dishonest children sounds like a dream halloween activity :(

[Fathom Zero]

:lol Dick Clark's brain scan looks like a tie-dye shirt.

[Zhukov]

Somebody that I hate is having their birthday party on Haloween, all my friends hate him too but are too weak to say 'no' to their invite :(

My first attempt at trying to celebrate Haloween has been a failure.

[Dixie]

my room mate and i were moving today and while we were walking our possessions the measly 2 blocks to our new abode his pants fell down to his ankles. Because his hands were full, he had to shuffle a full block with his pants down before he could pull them back up.
i will never forget this.

[Dixie]

doublepost...yet again

[captain516]

I spent this whole week staying up 'till 1 am, studying for a test in every period, only to find out today that they've all been rescheduled.:x

[Babs]

I was up til 5 am chattin it up with dracula and doc moc. Yeah, pretty amazing

[Kitsa]

:pagebrak


I saw a woman today who had on brown corduroy pants and a green turtleneck with construction-paper apples stapled all over it. I think she was an apple tree.

[Babs]

I saw this today in real life.

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

[Kitsa]

which one?

[Babs]

oh I'm just talking in general I saw those type of people.

I'll take some pictures today for everyone. You will not believe the people in Ohio and their "Wal-mart" apparel.

edit: I have seen this woman before though
http://media.peopleofwalmart.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/260.jpg

[Kitsa]

I, for one, totally believe the Ohio-Walmart thing.

Edit: also, is this who she's being?

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn199/kitsa_for_imockery/belle.jpg

[elx]

what is it that she's returning? a hair brush?

[Kitsa]

I'm still pissed off about "Paranormal Activity" being a total fucking waste of my time (see "last movie you saw" thread)

[Babs]

paranormal activity was a piece of shit. I can't begin to describe how disappointing it was.

On a different note, I just did my make up for this halloween party and I'm going as Monkey from The Adicts.

[Zhukov]

It looks like her hair is made of paper mache.

PS: I had to guess type the last half of that sentence because it is covered by one of the new ads that seem to appear right where I am trying to look, rather than the top of the page. YOU HAVE (1) FREE RINGTONE! CLICK HERE.

[elx]

http://i716.photobucket.com/albums/ww161/kelcnr/xoxo.png

[LordSappington]

I made a last-minute costume for school today by putting some welding goggles on, putting my hood up, and holding a pair of bolt cutters. Then I'd sneak up on people, and just stand behind them, brandishing the cutters. Got me a few good scares.
Later, I put the cutters in my hammer strap, started carrying a wrench, and made a fair Wastelander.

[Chojin]

i don't know what happened to me, but my main interests these days are: reclining in comfy chairs, eating expensive cheese, listening to easy music like Zero 7 or Leonard Cohen, smoking, and drinking wine.

I think it happened around the same time that I realized that I used to play games to unwind, but playing games isn't relaxing at all to me.

[Chojin]

i hope to use this as a gateway into reading books and smoking from a pipe, wish me luck

[Sam]

you are turning into Seththomas :eek

[Fathom Zero]

God, now I can't like Leonard Cohen anymore.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

On a different note, I just did my make up for this halloween party and I'm going as Monkey from The Adicts.

:)

[Guitar Woman]

Get a churchwarden!

Also, it's because games haven't been good since 2006. It hurt me too, bro.

[Chojin]

Get a churchwarden!

is that like a chadwarden?

[Colonel Flagg]

you are turning into Seththomas :eek

You will let us know if you start wearing bow ties, won't you Eric?

[Chojin]

You will let us know if you start wearing bow ties, won't you Eric?

I think seth was going off in a 1920's fetish creepshow direction, while I'm just becoming a modern gentleman.

I've considered joining a gym even though I have everything I need here, just so I can sit in the steam room and loudly talk about the wall street journal with my peers. :posh

I'm also kinda into BMWs.

[Guitar Woman]

It's a gandalf pipe. It's good for reading because the bowl doesn't get in the way of your book.

I bet you'd enjoy being surrounded by sweaty, naked men, you putz

[Chojin]

It's a gandalf pipe. It's good for reading because the bowl doesn't get in the way of your book.

I bet you'd enjoy being surrounded by sweaty, naked men, you putz

sweaty, naked, STRONG men.

[Babs]

By the way, where the hell has Pac Man been? He hasn't posted in about 5 months or more.

[Guitar Woman]

who?

[Babs]

that black guy
(http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/member.php?u=8921)

[Babs]

:pagebrak

[Aaarg]

so i'm eating a mixture of count chocula and boo berry. it's fucking delicious.

this one's probably about 2/3 c.c. and 1/3 b.b.

[Kitsa]

I've mixed boo berry and frankenberry before. Makes the milk a neat lavender color.

I think that burn last night took something out of me...I'm not getting jack shit accomplished today :(

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

After months of not getting around to it I went to Target to buy a toaster for $6. I wake up the next morning after months of wanting to make waffles. Put the waffles in and after 30 seconds the toaster starts smoking really bad. The waffles weren't burning but the toaster started to. Now I have to wait till wednesday to return it and get a better one.

[Kitsa]

That sucks.

I've been getting entertaining texts from some guy who thinks I'm the girl he met Halloween night. She must have given him a fake number.

[Tadao]

You're not supposed to pour waffle batter into a toaster you fucking drunk bastard.

[stevetothepast]

You're not supposed to pour waffle batter into a toaster you fucking drunk bastard.

:lol

[Aaarg]

i remember when i wanted to get a toaster oven really bad, but then i thought about how much easier it is to just buy eggos.

i mean, yeah, real waffles are infinitely better, but fuck. eggo's take two minutes at best.

sorry for your toasted loss.

[Kitsa]

Toaster convection ovens are wonderful. I bake cookies, cupcakes, casseroles, everything in mine. I barely even use my regular oven.

Has to be a convection oven, though. Mine's a black and decker, ran about $60.

[Aaarg]

Toaster convection oven? I don't even know what that is.

I always had a toaster growing up, it wasn't until moving out that I was introduced to toaster ovens.

[executioneer]

yeah convection ovens are awesome. you can even take em outside so you don't heat up the house if you're baking in summertime

[Dimnos]

Toasted turkey and muenster. All the reason you need to get a toaster oven. :yum

[Dimnos]

GD it! Now Im hungry! F you guys. >:

[Kitsa]

this is what I have:

http://www.blackanddeckerappliances.com/p-131-toast-r-oven.aspx

[Aaarg]

I don't know what we have, but it's red!

And yes, toasting sandwiches makes them five-hundred times better.

[stevetothepast]

I'll have to disagree. Toasted sandwiches are over-rated. The only reason to toast is to melt the cheese.

[Aaarg]

Well yeah, but hot shaved meat is yummy.

Or if you just toast the bread and the cheese, and then add the meat post-toasting.

But maaaaan, I don't know if I could eat a pulled pork sandwich without first toasting the bread anymore.

Wait, yes I could, that's yumlicious.

[Guitar Woman]

toast is for my eggs, not my cold cut combo.

[Kitsa]

well, it's not just for sandwiches.

You can make small batches (6 or fewer) of muffins or cookies, therefore not having a bunch sitting around to make you feel like a fatty.

You can make impressive grill marks on burger/hotdog buns. It's easier to control how toasty your bagels get.

If you can move the rack to the lowest position, you can roast a small chicken in one.

It's perfect for baked potatoes.

They make a half-size loaf of garlic bread that fits perfectly in toaster ovens.

And so on.

[Babs]

Just ordered Pizza Hut online for the first time. What can I say, amazing technology these days revolving around pizza alone.

Can't wait for this Super Supreme Pizza and some P'Zone.

[executioneer]

man i'm out of range of all the pizza huts, i gotta get dominos when i do online orders >:

[Chojin]

foreman grill, toaster oven, and an electric range and you're set for life

the foreman grill becomes the most important when you're dieting, though

[Fathom Zero]

RUTGER HAUER POWER HOUR RUTGER HAUER POWER HOUR

[Fathom Zero]

http://img338.imageshack.us/img338/8431/244hauerrutger100506.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

http://img249.imageshack.us/img249/1473/7ds6b.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

http://img97.imageshack.us/img97/6506/rutgerhauer.jpg
mah page hauer

[Pub Lover]

You're not supposed to pour waffle batter into a toaster you fucking drunk bastard.
Aww, soooo Cute. ^_^
I like 4 letter words too... like Love and Hapy ^_^
Cute and Clever. ^_^
i'm eating a lollypop right this very moment!

and this is the only time i will ever be able to participate in this thread cause i'm not allowed to eat in my room :( :( byeeeeeee :(

Cute and Sweet. ^_^

[Babs]

What the fuck is a Railfan? Who the hell seriously gets a god damn hard on over a train. This up there with being next to that awkward furry shit.

[Zhukov]

What's not to like about a huge beast born of Steel and Iron careening down a track at hundreds of kilometers an hour?

I mean, I'm not a rail-fan, I don't have model railways or anything, but I can see why people would like them.

[Kitsa]

Mandy Patinkin hearts trains.

avjwsLYsswQ

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I ended up having to use the toaster oven for the eggos. I love my toaster oven but not for making waffles or toast(mine is kind of old so it burns things.) Great for reheating pizza or wings.

[Dimnos]

A little late but what the fuck ever... Pizza Hut sucks balls! Their sauce is just tomato paste. >: Freschetta Brick Over Pizza is where its at! IF you just have to order in Papa Johns is the way to go.

[captain516]

Remember the "Jackpot!' guy from the recent Pizza Hut cokmmercials? Good God I never wanted to punch a fictional character so hard in my life.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Remember the "Jackpot!' guy from the recent Pizza Hut cokmmercials? Good God I never wanted to punch a fictional character so hard in my life.

Jim Brewer

[captain516]

Damn, too bad youtube's blocked here. I really want to see him "flip out".

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I bet pizza hut was all like "We need a celebrity to endorse our new pizzah hut commercials....but we only have $20. Who could we get?"

And Jim Brewer was all like "I'll take the case."

[captain516]

Next thing you now, there's gonna be a jackpot MOVIE.

[Guitar Woman]

fuck ties

[Seven Force]

id never be able to wear them if i did that

[Guitar Woman]

It's a good thing I stepped in that pile of dog shit after my job interview and not before it!

Also, how the fuck is someone with no people skills supposed to get a job, ever? What if I don't LIKE being a leader? How about a skill where I let you employers suck shit out of my ass?

I should have just skipped the interview and bought hard drugs to inject into my eye sockets.

[Dimnos]

Janitor dude.

[Dr. Boogie]

Also, how the fuck is someone with no people skills supposed to get a job, ever? What if I don't LIKE being a leader? How about a skill where I let you employers suck shit out of my ass?

You learn to fake sincerity and interest in whatever the employer does, and you pretend to be interested in the crappy lives of the people you work with. Ask any business major.

[Tadao]

Most of us lie in order to make money.

[Tadao]

GODDAMMITTTTTTTTTTT

[Dr. Boogie]

That's two people telling you to lie, GW. Get on it.

[Guitar Woman]

I was applying for some grassroots campaign shit and I lied through my teeth about how much I cared about genocide in Darfur, but I was jittery as fuck during the interview and probably looked like I was on cocaine the entire time.

Plus whenever they ask me WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU CAN BRING TO OUR WORK TEAM I think "uh, how about another person, you prick? You're the one who needed the fucking new employees so bad you put up a classified ad"

[Guitar Woman]

With the benefit of hindsight I think I at least did better than the heavyset black lady in goodwill clothes and jewelery who went "mmhmm" under her breath every 2 seconds during the group interview and at one point left to talk on her cell-phone for five minutes.

Liberals are also dumber than shit and their standards for pretty much everything are really low, so I think I've got a fighting chance.

[stevetothepast]

Janitor dude.

I was a janitor for a year and a half. it was easy and allowed me to be an alcoholic.

[Dr. Boogie]

Plus whenever they ask me WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU CAN BRING TO OUR WORK TEAM I think "uh, how about another person, you prick?

It's a generic question, so give them a generic answer:

Dedication
A hard-working spirit
A can-do attitude

[executioneer]

two hundred and fo'ty dollars worth 'a puddin'

[Tadao]

:pagebrak

I was applying for some grassroots campaign shit

You can get paid for doing this?

[Guitar Woman]

Neighborhood of 300 dollars a week, brah.

It's the kind of thing where you hang out on street corners or go door to door and pester people to donate for THE CAUSE.

I would hate myself, but I would also have money.

[Fathom Zero]

I don't like interacting with people. I can't do that. I like manual labor.

I could work in a meat-packing plant in my neck of the woods and make eighteen dollars and hour for lifting a box of meat five feet for seven hours a day, two ten minute breaks, and a lunch break.

[Tadao]

Yeah, but you would have to join a union. :x

[Fathom Zero]

what if I don't want to join a union?

[Tadao]

You won't work with meat then.

[Fathom Zero]

Bah. Unions suck.

[Tadao]

A long time ago, they were a good thing. I think nowadays they are using the people as a weapon for their own greed.

[Guitar Woman]

Jobs suck.

Why the fuck can't I just be a bum?

[Dr. Boogie]

Because you still have to sit outside and interact with people.

[Guitar Woman]

Not that I can't interact with people, I just feel like employers require you to be Dwayne Johnson in terms of charisma

And honestly, who would you hire first, a nervous, jittery alcoholic or The Rock

[Wiffles]

You should definately try being a bum, and see if it works well with you. Otherwise there are alot of jobs that dont need charisma, like fruit picker or something ^.^;

[captain516]

It's not that hard to smile and and nod politley. I'm socially awkward and even I can do that.

[Kitsa]

Unless you can snag one of these:

http://network.nationalpost.com/np/blogs/toronto/archive/2009/03/23/using-fake-homeless-people-improves-survey-city.aspx

The most spectacularly blown job interview I ever saw was a doctor. My boss, the superhighup executive doctor, had just gotten back from vacationing at his timeshare in Montana. While he waited for the interview guy to arrive, he was telling me about how great Montana was and how on his way to the airport there was an actual moose in the road. He and his wife and his kids all got out to look at the moose.

When the interview doctor arrived, he said he was sorry he was late and that he'd just gotten off a plane. This prompted my boss to ask where he was from. Montana, of course. My boss's eyes lit up and he started to go back into the spiel about how great Montana is.

The interviewee doctor said, "Yeah, it's great but the tourists have ruined it. On my way out there was some idiot who caused a huge traffic backup to gawk at a moose in the road."

That reads like a joke, but I swear it happened, I was sitting right there. The guy didn't get the job.

[Guitar Woman]

:lol

[Kitsa]

Ever since then, I've been trying to figure out the logistics. Was it my boss? Was it a different tourist? I can't remember when my boss got back to Chicago. I think it was that morning; I think this was a Monday. Could they have been on the same flight, or were there several morning flights from Montana to Chicago?

I found myself really, really hoping it was my boss the guy was pissed off about. I'm pretty sure my boss assumed it was.

[Aaarg]

Apparently Office Depot has higher security measures in place for their online store than the following: Amazon, Verizon, West Virginia University, Northern Virginia Community College, and the federal fucking government's Direct Student Loans program.

All of those services (and probably more I've forgotten over the years) have no problem with me using my credit card to make purchases, but not Office Depot!

So now I'm not getting the computer that I received a "shipping confirmation" email regarding, and I have to wait until my bank account clears the hold for the transaction and I can buy a different computer and then wait a few days for that.

I was really looking forward to fucking around with a new computer tonight, but uhhh I guess I'll have to wait another week at least?

Fuck you.


EDIT: also the couple I live with is fighting and I have to pick him up from class later (though she's at the same fucking place as him for the same amount of fucking time) and then I guess we're still hanging out and getting fucked up together?

[stevetothepast]

nobody said life would be easy Fido

[Aaarg]

everything's so terrible in the winter. i get paranoid that other people think less of me, i tend to get overwhelmed by a state of depression, blah blah blah. i don't like it when it gets cold.

[stevetothepast]

ya I think a lot of people feel that way in winter, in one way I look forward to the snow, but it does get pretty depressing after a while, my favorite season is the fall hands down. The summer pisses me off, too damn hot for my liking, spring is bullshit mud everywhere, fucking soggy ground and shit, and winter is depressing like you've said.

[Aaarg]

Yeah, fall is beautiful but it also tends to make me sad. It seems to make me dream a lot more, or at least has my imagination running more frequently. I like that aspect of it, but not the depression.

I used to hate the summer, but I've been growing to enjoy it more and more each year.

I love the changing of seasons because it makes things look different, but fuuuuuck the winter.

Luckily I'm not the only one in this household who feels this way. I was outside with my friend's wife, staring at the mountain across the road. She said "this part of the year makes me want to die."

[Chojin]

Neighborhood of 300 dollars a week, brah.

i wish i lived in the neighborhood of 300 dollars a week

[Fathom Zero]

Fucking Quicktime fucking piece of shit fucking Apple software. >:

[executioneer]

what'd it do this time

[Fathom Zero]

It doesn't want to let me actually download .mp3s. It keeps playing them in my browser. And I can't right click, because it's linked to from a Flash object.

I'm sure there's a setting in Quicktime, but I didn't care enough to keep a program that appropriated all media from everywhere.

And it called me a ******.

[Chojin]

the better question is why you have quicktime installed at all

[Fathom Zero]

Rosetta Stone requires it. :(

[Chojin]

you sure quicktime alternative won't work?
http://www.free-codecs.com/download/QuickTime_Alternative.htm

[Fathom Zero]

Oh, I'm sure it will if I try hard enough. Which I will do. I've got a super ultimate hyper codec pack that'll play everything for me. It just made me install that stupid thing when installing the rest of the stuff. >: Then I had to look at that blue Q every time I started up my computer, as I furiously tried to right-click+Close.

The only good thing I could possibly say would be that it leverages the GPU better when playing HD video, which I actually have a lot of now.

[King Hadas]

It doesn't want to let me actually download .mp3s. It keeps playing them in my browser. And I can't right click, because it's linked to from a Flash object.

I'm sure there's a setting in Quicktime, but I didn't care enough to keep a program that appropriated all media from everywhere.

And it called me a ******.
Secret technique!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v444/foxamess/Instruction.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v444/foxamess/info2.jpg

[Fathom Zero]

I don't use the fire fox.

[King Hadas]

What do you use?

[Fathom Zero]

Opera. And Chrome, but I don't really know why.

[DevilWearsPrada]

So, uh, my birthday was last week.




:(

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Happy belated birthday DWP. It was thursday right? How was it?

[Tadao]

I think he's lying.

[captain516]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIAR LIAR
PANTS ON FIRE

[King Hadas]

Opera. And Chrome, but I don't really know why.
Secret technique #2
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v444/foxamess/INfo3.jpgYou can do this in firefox too.

[Fathom Zero]

NOT IN A GODDAMN FLASH OBJECT

[King Hadas]

sorry :(

[Fathom Zero]

It's okay. I solved the problem.

[Kitsa]

which rosetta stone are you using?

[Fathom Zero]

There are versions?

Edit: 2.0.8.1a

[Kitsa]

I guess I should have said, "language".

Unless, of course, you're being a smartass.

[Fathom Zero]

I dunno, I have most of them.

14 GB worth. Because I bought all of them.

[Tadao]

Rip me Italian, I want to go to the opera and understand what the fuck they are talking about.

[Colonel Flagg]

You don't want to know - it's hopelessly boring in any language. :(

[Tadao]

That's a lie! I love the music of opera.

[Fathom Zero]

http://www.notmartha.org/archives/2009/10/27/meat-hand/

http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/473/redtopdown.jpg

[Colonel Flagg]

That's a lie! I love the music of opera.

So do I - just not the libretto. ;)

[Tadao]

http://www.powerlineblog.com/media/archives/fat_lady.jpg

Really, I always thought of it as Shakespearean. I wonder now, maybe it's just one horrible soap opera.

[Kitsa]

Depends on which opera- I like French and Italian stuff and some Austrian, but Wagner irritates me to no end. My vocal coach in college was a Wagnerian soprano and I got all the Wagner I could take and then some.

All operas are basically the same. Someone falls in love and someone dies. There are a few exceptions but that's most of 'em.

[Tadao]

I like Steinbeck novels, so I think I'll like them.

[King Hadas]

Make sure to yell bravissimo any time there's a pause in the show.

[Kitsa]

and you only yell "bravo" at guys. You yell "brava" to girls. That or "show us your tits".

[Tadao]

I suppose I'd have to dress nice too. :(

[Kitsa]

depends. Some opera crowds find it droll to dress down. Lots of opera-in-the-park is like that. The Arena in Verona is like that. But if you're going to a major city in a big specifically-for-opera space, yeah, you'd probably have to dress up. People dress to be seen at productions like that.

[captain516]

At most operas I've been to, they show subtitles from a screen hanging over the stage.

[Tadao]

I'm sure it's much more beautiful if you understand the language. Besides, I'd hate to have to take my eyes away to read words.

[Aaarg]

Besides, I'd hate to have to take my eyes away to read words.

I'm encountering that problem watching Kurosawa movies.

[DevilWearsPrada]

Happy belated birthday DWP. It was thursday right? How was it?

Thursday, yep. It was aight...me and some friends got a few hotel rooms and two 30 packs of beer, half of which ended up scattered around the hotel pool.
I cleaned up most of them, not wanting to get kicked out by the nice hindi people that ran it and cause a scene.

[Guitar Woman]

SLEEP PROBLEM UPDATE:

Benadryl fixed my wagon on monday; I fell asleep before 11 PM trying to stay awake for Colbert. Shit's unheard of. I missed him, but it was worth it.

THE PROBLEM is that I had to take ten of the fuckers to get the sleep-aid effect, and there are something like only 40 pills in each box. It was kid's benadryl, and I assumed that meant just chewable tablets, but they might also have just been weaker. I dunno.

I also went back to not sleeping last night so I guess this is going to be an everyday thing. Here's hoping it doesn't get expensive!

[Chojin]

dat stomach lining

i have a new ritual that started when i got my casein protein - casein metabolizes slowly, so you're supposed to take it before bed. So, i warm up a half cup of milk and then mix the powder in. Unlike my whey protein shakes, the casein is DELICIOUS and tastes like gooey melted brownies. Then I turn on the heater and get under 3 thin layers.

It still takes me forever to get to sleep, but I think it's a slight improvement.

[Guitar Woman]

Pfft, you can live without a stomach.

Plus I don't think it actually causes ulcers or whatever, since a lot of people use it as a sleep aid / horrifying psychoactive drug without problems

VINNIE TODD BUTTAFUOCO swears by it when his Ambien tolerance gets too high. This is actually a bigger problem than I'm making it out to be, so I should probably get a prescription.

[Aaarg]

man i'm high and captain beefheart just read me your post three times now.

[Fathom Zero]

BAel59isUjY

Goddamnit, Rankeri, that was funny.

[Guitar Woman]

Every mode of public transportation should be more like ferries

Arcades, gift shops, cafeterias, smoking decks, all that great shit

[Fathom Zero]

Like planes or buses. There's space for all that shit.

[Guitar Woman]

There could be. There could be.

[Supafly345]

The most I see on a bus is a vending machine.

[Fathom Zero]

One that serves cigarettes. :lol

[Guitar Woman]

My busses just have crazy people who chat me up about irrelevant shit until I get so uncomfortable that I pretend it's my stop and get off to get away from them. :(

[Zhukov]

My busses just have crazy people who chat me up about irrelevant shit until I get so uncomfortable that I pretend it's my stop and get off to get away from them. :(

Damnit this happens to me nearly every day. There are so many nutters out there and they all catch my bus.

There's this one guy that has really, really bad balance. I don't know if he has ear problems or something, but the bus always seems to take off before he has a chance to sit down and he goes flying around the place. He's always got too much baggage, too. And facial tics.

[elx]

that's what mp3 players/headphones are for. i take my ipod everywhere, even when i forget to charge it i still pretend i'm listening to something:( works awesomely

[Dimnos]

even when i forget to charge it i still pretend i'm listening to something

Not sure but I think this qualifies you as one of the "nutters". :\